WarbyPicus
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Sky Pride Vol. 4 Chapter 17- Necessary Rituals
🕑 Added 2025-10-07 14:00:12 +0000 UTC“This is a death trap!”
“It’s a hot spring complex, Brother Zihao. One with an attached hotel, restaurant, gardens and recreation pavilions. You know the mortals are getting whiffy. They need a bath.”
“Yes. The mortals.” Tian gave Liren a pointed look.
“Oh don’t you start this again! Leaving aside that it’s impossible, do you really think it’s worth it to avoid bathing?”
“I’m just saying if I can do it, everyone can do it. And should. It would be a much less stinky world if they did.” Tian sniffed, looking dubiously at the bath house. He couldn’t help but think the little symbol on the banner looked like steam rising out of a soup pot.
“Do what, Immortal Tian?” Little Treasure asked.
“Turn yourself into soup and rebuild yourself with snake meat and lotuses. A little trick I learned from a wise hermit when I wasn’t that much older than you. That's why I smell so nice all the time.”
“You really turned yourself into soup?!” Little Treasure’s eyes shot wide open.
“Yes, it’s a bit messy, but once you have gathered enough Three Venoms Seven Deaths Adders and Dustless Lotuses, you’ve done all the tricky stuff. All that’s left is injecting the flesh destroying venom into your limbs and chest, then falling back into a pool of water, crushed snake meat and lotus pulp. Eating the snake gallbladders and lotus seeds first is also a big help. Very good for the eyes and kidneys.” Tian tapped his nose.
Now both of the mortals were staring at him wide eyed.
“It’s not as strange as it sounds.” Tian muttered, lowering the tapping finger and looking back at the bath house. Bath house was an almost comic understatement. It was huge, elegant and exquisite, with more than a dozen immaculately maintained buildings wrapped around gardens so carefully tended, you might think they sprang into existence naturally.
“It is strange. It absolutely is strange. Don’t be fooled. This weirdo has the Dustless Lotus Phisique, but he keeps claiming that he made it by listening to some hobo in the jungle. This, Good Child, is what’s called a lie.” Hong spoke urgently. “Good children do not dissolve themselves in mud pits filled with mashed snakes and pond flowers. Not if they expect to live.”
“Which is why I said this is a death trap. Anyone can turn themselves into soup, it’s just that everyone thinks they can’t, so they don’t turn themselves back into people afterward. And this is clearly a place for making soup of people. For heaven’s sake, look at the sign! They are practically declaring to the world they are cannibals.” Tian was stubborn on this point. If a sickly, half dead child could manage it, then surely anyone could.
Censor Hanshen coughed and changed the subject. “I, for one, would appreciate the bath. And a night’s sleep at a… reliable inn. The Northern Beauty Hotsprings complex is somewhat legendary. It was created by the old Wu Kingdom, under Emperor Wudu, building on an even older site from the Sheng dynasty. There are famous poems that feature it, and endless artworks. None of which, I am happy to say, include cannibalism.”
Tian looked over the two and three story buildings, immaculate in their white plaster and red trim. The black tiles on the roofs gleamed under the setting sun. That same sun gave a warm luster to the lush gardens bursting with blue and red blossoms, white puffs of lotuses in green ponds and elegant pavilions overseeing them all. Each pavilion was placed to admire a pond and its darting koi, or a tall hill, or a fine rock surrounded by lovingly tended flowering trees.
His mouth couldn’t help but twitch. It looked better than the garden on the Windblown Manor. Elder Feng wasn’t a gardener, and Steward Pan had other duties, but it was still funny. A bunch of mortals made, and enjoyed, a nicer garden than an elder of the Ancient Crane Monastery. Maybe the materials weren’t as special, but their arrangement was, simply, better.
He sighed, knowing he was going to lose this argument. “Do they at least have decent tea?”
The etiquette of the bathhouse was bewildering, so Tian resolved to just do whatever the Censor did. They were led to a changing room with tiny closets to hang their robes and leave their weapons. If they wished, the clothes would be laundered, while fresh clothes were laid out for their use after they were done soaking and enjoying the services of the hot springs. Tian just shrugged and nodded.
His non-uniform robes were mortal make. They got pretty dusty and grimy. No force of propriety would see him parted from his weapons, however. As a concession, he hid them in his storage ring. The staff didn’t ask any awkward questions. They were the very soul of hospitality, in fact. The party consisted of an Imperial Censor, a plainly noble child, and two youths who might dress with excessive frugality, but had the casual fearlessness of the true elite.
Besides, while the girl looked like a farmer, the boy had the skin of an imperial concubine. The staff didn’t know they were receiving immortals, but it was the Broadsky Kingdom. A little extra hospitality was never amiss. You never really knew who you were serving.
Censor Hanshen insisted on bathing with Little Treasure “family style” and Tian tagged along. He had no clue what that meant, and was curious to see. What it actually was, was the two washing each other. First Hanshen poured warm water over Little Treasure, making sure the boy made good use of the soap and washcloth before rinsing him again and carefully washing his hair. Then Little Treasure returned the favor, looking quite comfortable with the whole process.
Tian wasn’t. Not that he truly objected to bathing. He rather enjoyed that just-clean feeling you got after a good scrub. It was Censor Hanshen.
The entirety of Censor Hanshen’s genitals were gone. There was a little hole left for him to pee out of, a scar, and that was it. He didn’t try to hide it either. It was just who, and how, he was. Tian asked how it came to happen, and the Censor could only shrug and say it was the arrangement of his family, and that the actual process itself was considerably unpleasant. However, thanks to surviving it, and his significant academic achievements, he was able to earn a posting to the Imperial Palace. At an age when most civil servants were suffering through their first rural postings, he was directly serving the Imperial family.
Why he was currently working in a comparatively distant province with a middling rank in the bureaucracy wasn’t explained, and Tian didn’t ask.
Carefully washed and toweled dry, they put on the soft tan robes made from luxurious cotton. They were the first cotton clothes Tian had ever worn, and while they lacked the sheen and smoothness of silk, the cozy breathability of the cloth nearly took his breath away. He immediately understood why cotton was such an expensive luxury. Such a precious material, how could it be common goods?
They exited the hall where they had been bathing and entered a garden. There were others in fine tan cotton robes walking along the winding pathways, each going to their assigned pool or pavilion. There were frequent admirers of the elegant, almost luminous, white crane wading in one of the ponds, with its striking red face. Tian just rolled her eyes and left her to it. He was hardly going to insist she hop in a hot spring with them.
They ran into Hong looking up at a statue emerging from a fountain in front of an elegant green tiled building. The statue was of a woman, half naked, her robes hanging loosely around her arms. The robe was done in a translucent yellow stone, while the body was carved from alabaster.
There was a quadrain carved into a rock at the base of the fountain, the characters painted a vivid red.
On a cold spring day, he bestowed upon her the honor of bathing with him at the Northern Pools,
The waters of the hot springs were smooth, and washed over her pale white skin.
The palace maids helped her to leave the pool, because she was too delicate and lacked strength.
This was when she began to receive the emperor's advances.
“This must be Lady Gufu. You may not know the story- she was the favorite concubine of Emperor Wutian. Their love was immortalized by many artists, including the Poet Xi. I’ve studied his work.” Censor Hanshen smiled as he admired the statue and poetry.
“Her hair seems a bit long.” Tian noted. Not so long as to be mannish, of course, but considerably longer than the sisters of the Ancient Crane Monastery would tolerate.
“Accurate to her era, perhaps. I don’t know when the statue was carved, but hair fashions change, and the sumptuary laws change too.” The Censor shrugged.
Tian looked at it then shrugged. “Good scrub, Sister?”
“Mmm. I’m soaking in the pool in there,” She jerked her thumb at the green roofed building behind her. “Then I’m off for the herbal soak. I’ll meet you for dinner in the…” She trailed off, trying to remember.
“The Peach Blossom Pavilion. Have fun.” Tian cupped his hands and smiled.
Hong stared at the statue for a long few seconds, then shook her head and glanced away. She read the poetry, shook her head again and waved as she walked into the bath house. Tian hid a sigh. Liren stood straight and tall as she walked into the bath house. Looking terribly alone.
Their hot spring was in a large building. The spring itself was surrounded by a stone-lined pond, with a built-in bench below the water line. It was one of the cooler thermal springs, suitable for a child like Little Treasure. The boy groaned and flopped bonelessly on the bench, his little face just above the water line.
“Hehe. It seems the young gentleman is tired. Have you been on a long journey?” There were other men in their pool, a bit older than the Censor. A slightly chubby man that Tian dubbed The Merchant, and a skinny wisp of a man with a goaty beard and a faintly superior attitude. Tian decided that he was likely an official, or possibly a scholar.
“Just beginning one, I’m afraid, but all travel is tiring if you aren’t used to it.” The censor cupped his hands towards the two seniors. Tian had long since done the same, but didn’t feel any need to speak. Speaking, in his experience, was a dreadfully treacherous thing. Silence around strangers was always wise.
“Seniors, I caught a little of what you were saying when I walked in, and it sounded interesting. Were you referring to Sima’s Rites of Wei just now?” the Censor asked.
“Ah, a fellow scholar!” Goaty smiled and nodded. The Merchant likewise smiled, though a bit more thinly. “Indeed, indeed! Particularly the passage in Chapter Six- ‘The Heavenly Court and its officers stand in their eternal places, changing positions only after endless cycles of testing and reincarnation. So too must the earthy court be, lest chaos and disorder blight the nation and bring untold suffering to the world.’” Goaty had a good voice for reciting, Tian thought. It was easy on the ears.
Censor Hanshen nodded. “A rather uncontroversial section, I always thought, yet it seems the Gentlemen have grown heated in your argument. What inspires so much passion?”
“It’s internally contradictory, and points to the false conclusion it is routinely cited to support.” The Merchant’s voice was confident and relaxed. “The positions aren’t eternal if they change, and the cycles of testing aren’t endless since they do result in changing positions. The framing reflects the author’s prejudices, not a verifiable truth.”
The Censor started laughing and coughing at the same time. “I see what you mean. I believe the accepted interpretation is that on a mortal timescale, they are functionally eternal, and likewise when each cycle of testing and rebirth lasts as long as a universal epoch of creation and destruction, it too could be deemed “endless.””
That got an approving nod from Goaty and a smirk from The Merchant.
“Exactly the orthodox position. Attested to by numerous authoritative commentaries, I might add.” Goaty slid a glance over to The Merchant as he stroked his wispy beard.
“And I would agree… that it is the orthodox position and has much support in the commentaries, though ‘authoritative’ might be a stretch too far. But the key points still stand- the argument is self defeating, and reflects the author’s prejudices, not a verifiable truth. It’s put forward to support the establishment of an immobile social hierarchy. But we know that some of our very best civil servants come from the peasant and merchant classes, and are promoted based on merit. Likewise the Army is commanded by nobles, often, but even those nobles had to earn their way up the officer ranks. Many of them became ennobled for their military achievements! Only the Imperial Family and those holding the title of Duke or other enfeoffed nobility are excepted. And there are fewer of them every year.”
“Ah, I see where you are going. There is such a thing as virtuous and orderly social mobility. I suppose the fact that there are both hereditary and non-hereditary noble titles would support that argument, and the enfeoffed nobility all trace back to the founding of the kingdom.” Censor Hanshen nodded.
“Exactly. For the kingdom to be stable, it must be unstable in controlled ways. Particularly in the face of injustice. If a person suffers in a role they are not suited for, they should be allowed to find a role that serves them, and society, best. If their current role was assigned by administrative error or administrative incompetence, then it is doubly just. Rather than rely on Sima, I prefer the proverb of the Old Master- ‘Refusing to correct a mistake is the true mistake.’” The merchant smiled in triumph.
“Prioritizing finality and reliability in official pronouncements is hardly a mistake! There is good reason for saying the place of a peasant is behind a plow or in the rice paddy, without permitting the possibility of becoming a noble, a merchant, a soldier, or any other class. Let us not forget that the Kingdom of Wu replaced the vile Shang. The slave armies of the Shang were bad enough, but the civil wars and warlordism that ravaged the land for almost three hundred years during their long collapse were considerably worse! No fixed status, only the constant striving for dominance.” The long bearded man slapped the water to emphasize his point. Tian wondered if he did it as a display of dominance, like the crane stretching her wings.
“Rape, murder and cannibalism were utterly common in that era, particularly given the famines that occurred due to an absence of peasants to work the fields. A place for everyone, and everyone in their place. Order, not for its own sake but to ensure the safety and prosperity of all. Individual injustices are more than justified by the benefit to social harmony fixed ranks provide.”
Goaty flicked the dancing water, sending spray flying. He then stretched a dripping hand out of the hot spring to rap the stone floor of the bathhouse, as though the existence of flagstones proved his thesis. Chaos versus fixed order, perhaps, though Tian couldn’t help but notice the pool was spring fed, and those stones had been quarried and cut before they were brought here.
“The prosperity of all?” The Merchant’s smile was unkind. “Some more than others, I think. We can afford a stay at the hot springs. Could the waiters here say the same? How about a disabled veteran, a widow, an orphan?”
“All. Because no matter how low and mean a peasant’s life may be, if they have enough food for two good meals a day, a decent roof over their heads and the wherewithal to raise a family, then they are prospering. So long as they are well educated, so long as the rituals of civilized life are firmly etched into their bones, they will be content.” Goaty’s eyes were clear, and his voice firm.
Tian immediately thought of the Dragon Calling Bell. Ring that, and fate had determined you were worthy of joining the Outer Court of Ancient Crane Mountain. Don’t, and a cultivation life wasn’t for you. A question of birth. Except it damn well wasn’t, was it? Not everyone had the potential to reach the apex, that was true, but far, far more than you would suppose could better their lot with cultivation. If they were just given the chance.
“Seniors, if I may ask, what brought on this argument?” Hanshen asked.
“A ghost haunts the hot springs at night, and has done so for centuries. It claims that it had passed the Imperial Exams, but its results were wrongfully revoked and he was condemned to a life working in these baths. In death, it claims, it serves the people by suppressing evil ghosts and instructing those spirits that will listen about virtue and benevolence. Complaints about the ghost have piled up unresolved for so long, they have their own closet in the prefectural archive. We were coming here anyway, and thought we’d investigate and make a decision. In our roles as Officials of the Ministry of Personnel, should we grant the ghost an honorary role and title after death, relieving its grudge and confirming its service to the Kingdom? Or should we strictly maintain order, conform to the rulings of the ancestors, and have it executed by an exorcist?”
Comments
Oscar Shipley
Two respected seniors, philosophising in a hot spring?? This is familiar ground
Ranger Science
Ban, you fools, it is neither interpretation: the *positions* are eternal; who is *in* them may change.
Nùmenor
I love the philosophical element of this novel. It adds a level of depth that simply doesn't exist in most Xianxia.
Brandon Cleveland
If Tian is able to teach and or prove the reality of 'soup making' that would be a huge benefit for the sect.
Endgame
Edit suggestion Tian just rolled her(his) eyes and left her to it. He was hardly going to insist she hop in a hot spring with them.
Felix Giron
If the role of mortals (represented by the mandated Emperor and his bureaucracy) is to mediate between Heaven and Hell, then the two poached officials' concerns regarding the overreaching ghost are more jurisdictional than ethical. Bathing pools are the new/old cop bars.
Jeryd Greer
What an interesting end to the chapter… Tftc
Nonnyor Business
Valid point. I'll work on it and see what I can do.
Tom C
Idk about this chapter tbh. It’s good… but I feel like it’s a bit too much tell? The philosophical depth here is obvi well researched - order vs change i think? My issue is that, when it is presented through extended dialogue, it kinda starts to feel like the story pauses for a lecture. The same ideas might hit harder if they came through character choices, or maybe the ghost’s situation, rather than just dialogue. The philosophy can underpin the story as opposed to being front and centre TFTC!
Mmaze
Zhong Kui-ish tea party let's gooo!
Nikolai Beckel
You just can't resist, huh? It's just an urge you've gotta fulfill, to include these chapters with long-winded philosophical debates. One of my favorite parts of your writing though, so never stop lol.
Wholly Anonymous
So, any chance the bigger of the two is planning to make a new, beautifully-sculpted body for the ghost? Perhaps while the other writes poetry to calm it down?
Noah
Hopefully she’s there to witness Tian Soup 3.0!
Kain
He’ll convince someone like that old diviner they met a few chapters ago. Someone who’s opinion or agreement on the matter will only reinforce everyone else’s disbelief
Orthes
This seems kind of core to a lot of the major themes though? They are literally discussing the same thing that the elders from Ancient Crane asked Tian and the other three to think about.
Deathly_God
Did we just meet the same duo from Slumrat, in the springs once again?
Hermit Yarma
I didn't expect the story to take this turn, that's for sure.
BelligerentGnu
Ok, I really really need Liren to understand Tian soup is real.
Zenopath (AEV)
Mmm feels like a filler. Not every chapter can be gold I guess. A philosophical debate just to introduce the fact there's a ghost? Oh well, still a fun chapter, I suppose.
Raymond Mouton
Thanks for the chapter. Good one.
Edward Sandberg
Is this the same Sima from the Redstone Wastes arc…that’s what I’m curious about. I think it’s a possibility.
William Johnson
If they're talking about what constitutes good, who you gonna call? The glorious emperor’s third order of the outer division of the Phoenix office of personnel’s investigatory cabinet secretariat
Brandon Cleveland
Okay but if the ghost is suppressing evil spirits and guiding more neutral ones to better standing isn’t that more deserving of a small local festival or shrine instead of trying to get rid of it?
Red Potato
Tian soup is my favorite gag, I hope he finally convinces someone it is true.
BurnNote
With all respect, that's more what you're noticing. There's another error in the chapter: "Tian just rolled her eyes and left her to it. " That sounds be his. I didn't try to find any.
Noah James
This chapter is everything I love about warby’s writing
Aaron Weingrad
If there is something strange In the bathhouse pool Who you gonna call? The glorious emperor’s third order of the outer division of the Phoenix office of personnel’s investigatory cabinet secretariat
Abhi
Nice call back. I am looking forward to Tian having tea with another ghost lol. Sounds like a nice enough dude.
Johan Persson
“It is strange. It absolutely is strange. Don’t be fooled. This weirdo has the Dustless Lotus Phisique" Think this should be Physique! Noticing this made me realize that it stood out for being so rare. Amazingly rare, really, considering this is patreon and not RR. I don't know if i've ever read a webnovel with fewer spelling errors, or errors in general. Absolutely *loved* Tian immediately realizing that he's obviously in front of an industrial sized longpig cooker.
Veridescent
Ah yes there it is the sociocultural philosophy. Social harmony above all is such a funny thing when you look at the logistics of rebellions that happen due to a lack of restoration or remediation of harm that becomes systemic due to fixedness being actually quite good for making local power blocs with little true accountability. Its a interesting thing when looking at the term usage for the mandate of heaven(most interesting during plagues). Though one can note that as a dynamic of a lot of rigid hiearchies in practice. Anyway, a lovely place for swim lessons I am sure. A ghost surely knows of good means of swimming after being here so long.
Sam
It's appears I was right about our Censor. Again the person that did it. And the person that ordered it should be taken out back and shot. Then quartered and bathed in Lemon juice
Pinpenny the great lithian
Out of curiosity, is this particular scene a reference to non-Warby piece of literature I don't know off, or is it just a funny callback?
Pinpenny the great lithian
Two guys, arguing in a pool about philosophy. One portly, one thin. *Looks around* Where's Medici?
Steve Wright
Two senior demons, arguing philosophy in the bath, mist from the springs hiding the view while letting the truth shine through.
William Johnson
Hot springs and philosophy?! Sweet!
