intertwining

who you are

is very good so be itopenly * [a collection of 35mm film]

grace

i sit in the fire and i run from the fire and i am the fire.i sleep for days and wake up and am fed by Grace. my heart is tender like raw meat. i spill coffee on my white blouse and i don’t care. i care so much. i show up. i hide. i lay down and sleep more and pray to be protected while i sleep. i surrender and have ...

and when love speaks to you, believe in Him

For even as Love is for your growth so is he for your pruning.Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun,So shall he descend to your roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth.And when he speaks to you believe inhim,Though his voice may shatter your dreamsas t...

riding the pregnant tigress

learn that your innate luminous nature is a hair’s breadth away (i) know who you are i want to say this now don’t worry. you are so good. i said this to a friend and then a week later he said it back to me and thank god because i forgot … we need to keep reminding one another, recollection of God is the impenetra...

new moon in cancer

i wake with the feeling of the knife in the back of the heart. after taking asana and breakfast, i am to drive Lama Lorraine to physical therapy. i pick her up and am a little nervous. i am wearing a nice dress and shawl to be respectful. i am surprised that she remembers my name. she is grandmotherly and has a british...

mandalic entrance

circle around the Heart of matter /slow and steady, or swift movementit doesn’t matter /as long as it is with love/what is That? there is no use in trying to figure it out /breathe pay attention a little more this time /

drawing blood, std panels, and unconditional love

there is ordinary magic moment to moment which can easily be missed by the hungry ghost. what is it that we hunger for? perhaps to be loved without condition, seen in our totality and strangeness without judgement. sometimes, in being seen, it can lead to clinging to an external situation or person that seems to be the...

or, like a dream

downpour and cherries

no one controls Nature i thought gleefully as the rain poured suddenly down and a shirtless man met my eye and we giggled and another person under an umbrella shrugged and grinned and i stopped. and became drenched in order to take in the velvet-y soaked pink flowers and i felt the inner fire and the sun came, everyth...

liminal moments

everything is changing

i danced and danced and danced…/we went to the city and the Mother fed us in many forms fat and hairy strong or luminous homeless and rich and there was chaos but always there was the stillness the radiant nucleus watching silent witness…and i was heavy and i am light and i fuckedand i weaved everything together ev...

observations

a poem from the first day of april

i take myself to cold river holding florathe whole way /gently and fiercely /the lips of this flower smell of honeysuckle and what is this urge to consume/what we love?/wind caresses skin icy air, sweet milkand the brilliant sun/reveals and reveals more /you cling to your confusion your confusion does not cling/to yout...

streaming iridescence

smell the flowers /at the cafe it’s orgasmicand the barista plucks one off and places it in the center /of the palms sharing fragrance of heart /and a private student says here is the glass jar of herbs i made it for you and i smile and pause /while giving head to a loveri want to see his face enraptured, relaxedungu...

meditation (05.03.25)

the spine is an icicle /ice to water fluidity to translucence /love is an ocean unfathomable action /the ones who love the world are offering the body/and then disappearing like waves /here and then gone /do not say i love you become the ocean

a flash of lightning in the dark night in the dream of loving awareness

loosen the grip

i walk near a bird with plastic in the mouth and this creature clings tightly to treasure, swiftly flying on /and i wonder how many times we cling tightly to what we think is good for us, good for this ephemeral form /to grip tenaciously to contract beautifully do not let go make love to the poison /and then there is...

‘the heart essence’

Hatha Yoga is medicine/take the posture. where is the mind? /love yourself so much that you forget yourself /fuck the mystery the pregnant sky /the body is an offering to God, unfathomable Love /seek this love inside, in quiet /be spontaneous .. look into someone’s eyes /for a while, in silence .. see the Beloved /...

learning to work with water

if i do not/respect steaming pot it burns me /if i do not /respect frozen expanse i fall / in clumsiness i spill boiling liquid /in reverence i am stream mm mother river /this moment becomes baptism / if i do naught /[ — learning to work with water/wrath — ]

fields of flora [ii]

fields of flora [i]

15 years ago, i decided to embark on a project where i took one self portrait a day for a year. i called it 365 days (original). this ritual was my refuge of quietude and stillness within a very emotional and seemingly turbulent inner world. i didn’t have words for it at the time; attention is a form of devotion, and...

another experiment

Millions are burning with the fire of aggression. We can sit with the intensity of the anger and let its energy humble us and make us more compassionate. This is where the fourth instruction comes in: it is helpful to think about the person who is angry, the anger itself, and the object of that anger being like a dream...

if the root is cut, the branches cannot grow

waters

i walkto the waterfall and stop *to admire the rocks and roots and sky and here *blush-tinted expanse and verdure fertility i lay on a bed of stones *and listen to the mother *and gaze at the emptiness and fullness inside i ask the teacher *about the gaze and he says stop return to the breath *all the textures breathin...

is-ness

a drop of oil on a sizzling pan *in immediacy no time for thoughts *no need to push that away with one-point of attention *all-pervasive laser beam. surrender *to the paradox *i am empty and fullof the holy spirit *i pray to be hollow tool *for Thy will*the master (no mind)the clouds * included the elements in balance...

cold, spring lake

i am the cold water clear, fluid container around these bliss limbs the breath slow and deep the lake swift unchanging and the waxing gibbous ivory wind horse silent luminous witness —

the places that scare you

we are learning firsthand what everyone who has ever set out on this path has learned: we are all a paradoxical bundle of rich potential that consists of both neurosis and wisdom.— pema chödrön —

naked luminosity (visual diary)

naked luminosity (poem)

Topaz leaves quiver by windSilver moon weeps gentlyupon the mid night*Little flowerAnd heretrees blush —*Swollen,vulvic, birthing.*Laboring blissfully hum, *Repetitive unborn drum*Laughter which slices heart down the center *And I seeAnd I seethe pregnant sky*Who is there to see?Who is there to see?Holy flesh sunrise...

The Flowers of Our Wrath

“Divine rage is fierce. disciplined, and visionary...The aim of divine rage is not vengeance but to reorder the world...Perhaps our task as human beings is to find safe containers for our raw reactionary rage - and then choose to harness that energy in a way that creates a new world for all of us.”—VALARIE KAUR�...