E.M. Dash Web Novels
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Chapter 041 The Mayo is King
🕑 Added 2025-08-25 22:00:05 +0000 UTCDay 5. Monday 1:00pm.
Oh, crap. If she finds the bow and sword, I have no explanation. Jack dashed for the front door.
His mom stepped inside, carrying a tray piled high with fresh-cut herbs.
“Hey, Mom. I was just coming to see if you needed any help?” He scanned the tray; there was no bow or shortsword, so no need for an explanation. Phew. I’d better move them later.
Raising a suspicious eyebrow, his mother said, “You came to help me pick a few herbs? Why?”
Oh, damn. Panic prickled at his skin as he forced a too-wide smile to cover his guilt. “Can’t I be nice to my own mom?” he asked. “You do so much for us and…” He ran out of nice things to say.
“Hmm.” Anna didn’t sound convinced. She gave him a long frown as she carried the herbs into the kitchen.
Desperate to change the subject, Jack asked, “Is there anything quick I can eat? I’m heading to the Adventurers Guild soon.”
She gave a short laugh. “Now it all makes sense. You’re after food… again.” Shaking her head in mock disappointment, she added, “I’m a little busy right now. Why don’t you make yourself a sandwich?”
“Sure,” he said, glancing around the kitchen. “What can I use?”
His mom shot him a dry look. “Most people use food, Jack. With all those books you read, I assumed you’d know that.”
He groaned. “I can see where Polly gets her wonderful personality from.”
Anna gave him a smirk that wasn’t too different to his sisters. “There’s sliced honey roast ham in the cooler. Add some salad… also in the cooler. And you’ve got yourself a ham salad sandwich, Jack. There’s mayo in there, too.” She shook her head, disappointed in having to explain where everything was.
Jack’s stomach gave a loud grumble. “That sounds really good.”
Zia, perched at the end of the table, copied him with wide eyes. “That sounds really good.”
Jack laughed. “Want a sandwich, Zia?”
The little girl nodded, her silver hair bouncing with each movement.
He grinned. “I was beginning to believe you were on a biscuit-only diet.” He’d seen the little girl eat a lot of biscuits.
Flushing a soft pink, she said, “They’re really, really, really nice…” Her voice went small. “And they remind me of my mommy.”
Jack’s grin softened into something more tender. Poor kid.
Anna reached over and pulled Zia into a gentle hug. “Until we get some meat on those bones of yours,” she said, ruffling her hair, “you can eat as many biscuits as you want… though not as many as Jack.” She leaned in and, with an exaggerated stage whisper, added, “You don’t want his huge, podgy belly.” She placed a gentle kiss on Zia’s head.
The little girl giggled. Whether at the joke or the kiss, it wasn’t clear.
“Hey, I’m not podgy!” Jack protested, jiggling his not-quite-flat stomach. “It’s just that my muscles like a bit of… erm… padding to keep them warm.”
The kitchen rang with laughter and little Richard’s gurgles, as Jack moved to prepare sandwiches. “Do you want one too, Mom?” he called over his shoulder while rummaging through the chilled larder box; it was an enchanted brass and copper contraption that hissed as it released a curl of cold mist when opened.
His mother paused mid-chop. “What have you done with my son?” she asked in a serious tone.
Jack froze, his heart thudding. Shit! Has she noticed something? His eyes widened. He didn’t know what to say.
But then she chuckled. “I think that’s the first time you’ve offered to make me something to eat.” She smiled. “I’d love a sandwich, Jack. Thank you.”
Relief washed over him. “I’m sure I’ve offered before? Haven’t I?” He tried recalling a memory of making his mom a meal. But nothing came. Damn. I was so selfish…
“Nope,” Anna said, returning to her work. “I’d remember. Polly’s the same.”
Jack stepped forward and gave her a hug from behind. “Sorry, Mom. I’ll try to be more thoughtful in the future.” The words were simple, but he meant every one of them.
Zia rushed to join the hug, wrapping her small arms around them.
Anna hugged back. “It’s alright. I love cooking, it’s my passion. But… it is nice to be asked once in a while, so thank you.”
Jack nodded. I should do something nice for Mom and Dad… The thought lingered as he turned back to the worktop. What could I do to show them I love and appreciate them? He retrieved the ingredients from the magical cooler. Crisp lettuce, ruby-red tomatoes stored in a humming freshness drawer, and a large jar of creamy mayo that resealed itself after each scoop. “Mom, can I use this cheese?” He was holding a small enchanted pot of grated cheese.
Anna shook her head. “No, not that one. That costs more than your dad earns a week.” She pointed at a larger pot. “Use that one.”
Shrugging, Jack collected the other pot. Why’s that cheese so expensive? To his untrained eye, it looked like any other cheese. He popped slices of bread into the toaster. A squat brass machine with runic heating coils that clicked and hissed as it browned the bread in under a minute, before puffing out a single fragrant puff of spent aether-steam as if pleased with itself.
Jack laid the toasted bread on a cutting board that was enchanted to keep crumbs in a neat little pile. A flick of his finger activated the spreader. A brass wand-like utensil that skimmed across the toast with precise, even strokes, singing to itself in a whimsical tune including the lyrics, ‘Joy to the world, the mayo is king.’
He chuckled, shaking his head at the quirky spreader that would sing about what was being spread. “Mom, what’s wrong with this thing?” he asked, waving it in the air. “These lyrics are awful.” The spreader moved on to another verse of ‘The Mayo is King’ tune, including the words, ‘So pickles get your buns; for the creamy condiment fun.’ Jack winced. “It doesn’t even rhyme.”
Anna chuckled. “It’s a prototype. The inventor knows your dad and asked me to give some feedback.” She started laughing. “So, what’s the verdict? Should we buy one if it ever goes to market?”
Jack looked at the spread mayo, while the spreader was on another verse of, ‘Joy to the world, the mayo is king.’ Turning the thing off, he replied, “Well, it spreads like a dream, but those lyrics are bad. I think its memory crystal is corrupted or something.”
Anna nodded, still chuckling.
“I like it,” Zia declared, with no shame and questionable musical taste. She began singing the chorus in a shy, nervous voice. “Joy to the world, the mayo is king.” But forgot the rest and resorted to, “La, la, la, la, lalala…” before repeating the chorus.
Jack and Anna broke into laughter as Zia turned a vivid shade of pink. Little Richard gurgled along to the catchy tune as he tried to eat his own hand.
Being in the capital of innovation, inventors were always releasing new ‘useful’ devices for the modern-day kitchen. Being in the cooking industry, his mom tried new technology.
Jack continued making sandwiches by layering the ham, salad, and cheese. Making sure each sandwich looked as good as it tasted. He even sliced the tomatoes thinner for Zia and cut the crusts off her sandwich, remembering how Polly used to hate them when they were younger.
After preparing enough toasted sandwiches for the three of them, he glanced over at his mom. She was busy sealing sauces in small jars with an aether-powered gadget that formed a vacuum and sealed the jar lids. Zia was swinging her legs at the table, watching him with eager anticipation while still humming ‘The Mayo is King’ tune.
This, Jack thought, this is worth protecting. He placed the three plates on the table. “Sandwiches are ready, Mom.”
Anna smiled. “Be there in a moment, just a few more jars to do and the order’s complete,” she said while pulling the bronze lever to activate the device. It gave a sharp ‘phshh’ noise as the vacuum was formed.
Jack sat beside Zia and nudged her plate towards her.
“Thanks!” she said, then took a bite. Her eyes widened. “This is really, really good!”
Jack beamed. “Better than a biscuit?”
She chewed a few times, then whispered, “Maybe?” But her head shook from side to side betraying her true feelings.
He laughed. “High praise.”
Anna joined them a minute later, wiping her hands on a towel before sitting down. She took a bite and raised her brows. “Jack… this is excellent.”
He grinned. “What can I say? I’ve got hidden talents.”
Anna gave his hand a quick squeeze. “Don’t hide them, love. Let them shine.”
In a kitchen filled with the warm scent of toasted bread and roasted ham, the trio ate together in companionable silence, while little Richard was still trying to eat his own fist.
Comments
ReaderofMany
How sweet
