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#1115 The Divine Realm’s King of Inflation
🕑 Added 2025-01-17 19:42:59 +0000 UTCIt is still I, Hermes, the celestial god of Olympus.
How might we restrain this canine deity, Anubis, lest the Saint be doomed to one day rest upon a museum’s display shelf?!
“Hmhmhmhm… The soul returning unto its mortal vessel? So there be gods with such outlandish beliefs about life and death.”
“Who dares to speak?!”
And forth steps a burly elder with cheeks aflame.
The God of the Underworld from the Buddhist realm, the Great King Enma?!
“The soul doth wander the endless cycle of rebirth, ever passing from one body to the next. By such means it gathers merit, heaps upon itself karma, and in time at last finds release from this realm of suffering, thereby attaining perfect freedom. What purpose, pray tell, is served by thrusting it back into a mortal body once departed? ‘Tis naught but a reversal of the natural wheel of rebirth!”
E-Enma, my lord?!
Let us not spark religious warfare in this place, I beg thee!
Let us respect one another’s beliefs!
“And the weighing of a soul’s virtue and sin at life’s end, then guiding it unto a new turn of the wheel—this is mine sacred office as King Enma. Especially for the Saint who dwells in this world, whose heart and deeds art more virtuous than most. I come in person that I might see him properly sent onward in the cycle of rebirth.”
My thanks for explaining thy motive for arriving!
Yet!
Anubis needs not fret over the Saint’s afterlife! Truly, ‘tis far too soon to worry.
Moreover, in Olympus, we too possess well-established laws for dealing with the departed!
It is complete with thorough benefits!
Right, Uncle Hades?!
“Ah… erm… indeed…?”
What is this, Uncle?
Thy answer doth falter…!
All is well, yes?
“O-Of course it is! Have I not reigned as lord of this underworld since time’s first dawn? Day by day the souls pour in, and we sort them all by a grand system. The underworld is divided into eight circles, from the First Hell to the Eighth. And in the deepest pit, Cocytus, dwell the most accursed sinners—Cassius, Brutus, and Judas—gently gnawed by Satan… Wait, why is Satan in here…?”
Uncle Hades, that portrait of the underworld sounds suspiciously like Dante’s creation…
Or some hodgepodge from Kurumda Msami.
“Silence! The glory of Olympus is its generosity in all matters. So long as the lyre’s melody moves our hearts, we can even return a dead man to the land of the living!”
Perhaps that generosity is somewhat excessive, seeing how the gods often cause chaos upon mortal soil…
Especially in matters below the waist.
At the sight of such unseemly talk, King Enma gives a derisive snort.
“Hahahahaha… well, in truth, most underworld realms art thus. Overstuffing the details of one’s afterlife arrangement leads only to contradictions ere long.”
Kindly spare us the meta-commentary.
“But we of the Buddhist realm possess a doctrine of life and death forged by many awakened masters, leaving no gap nor flaw in its grand design! I speak of the Eight Great Hells, from the lesser punishments in the Hell of Revival, the Hell of Black Ropes, the Hell of All-Assembled Sufferings, to the Screaming Hell, the Great Screaming Hell, and then the Heating Hell, the Great Heating Hell, and lastly Avici, the Bottomless Pit. Within each of these lie sixteen subsidiary hells with finely detailed names, specific sins, and punishments set forth.”
“Might the Eight Cold Hells be lacking in detail?”
“Hush!”
Indeed, dividing hells into eight layers is quite reminiscent of Dante... I mean, Uncle Hades’s Underworld, yet thou hast subdivided each layer into sixteen smaller domains?
That is stuffing in details aplenty.
“And to proceed further, in the deepest circle of the Eight Great Hells—the Avici Hell, also called Abiji—is a span of eighty thousand yojanas, encircled by seven walls and layered with seven iron lattices. Within stand 18 barriers, and between each barrier slither 84,000 serpents spitting poison in all directions. Moreover, 500 billion worms each bearing 84,000 beaks doth torment the damned. The agony of Avici Hell surpasses even that of all other hells combined a thousand times over!”
Wait a moment.
‘Tis an appallingly large litany of numbers.
Why dost thou array such crude, enormous figures without end?
Art thou crafting a mere draco ball manga, wherein strength is measured only by the magnitude of numbers?
Moreover, why from earlier have thou spoken naught but of hell?
Surely thou intend not to fling our precious Saint into damnation after his demise?!
“Perish the thought! A soul of such pure merit should ascend far beyond any Hell. Indeed, he might rise to the highest of heavens, the Deva Realms. Perchance even to the realm known as Paranirmita-vasavartin, supreme among the six celestial worlds of desire, wherein all pleasures may be shaped at will. A single lifespan therein is 16,000 years, but one day in that realm equals 1,600 years below.”
Another avalanche of outrageous numbers…
“Given the Saint’s virtuous deeds, he is surely worthy to ascend to that heaven. Surely ‘tis a far loftier fate than entering some random underworld of this realm?”
Nghhhhhh...!
Uncle Hades, thou hast been reproached! Hast thou no rebuttal?
Alas, Uncle Hades is dumbstruck and can muster no retort.
Anubis, too, stands in silent defeat!
Nay, this cannot stand!
There must be some means to challenge these overinflated mythic fancies with their endless tallies!
Yes, Odin!
There is yet another deity among us, newly arrived from his own realm!
Odin, hast thou aught to say?!
Didst thou not come hither seeking to guard the Saint as well?!
If thou wouldst not speak now, Enma shall claim the Saint by default!
Hast thou naught to offer?!
No boon to bestow if thou be named his patron god?!
“Mm? Nay, none in particular.”
What?!
Wherefore such lethargy?!
Then why comest thou all this way?!
“Why, to lure the Saint unto mine own underworld, Valhalla.”
Right… thou, too, rule a realm of the dead.
“I am a collector of mighty souls. I ever desire more heroes, more men who have toppled legions and stood astride mountains of corpses to join me in mine hall. All in preparation for Ragnarok, that final battle of the gods. Though the Saint may be an amicable sort, he might awaken his battle lust if cast amid ceaseless conflict. And the allies that cling to him art no weaklings either. I would gather them all, hence subduing their leader first is the keystone of mine plan.”
This is dire...
Every god here, from realms known and unknown, thinks likewise.
Verily, Odin was such a god in that world.
All was war, and strength alone did unite their values.
Take whatsoever thou desire, fear not death, and let combat and victory art thy sole justice.
Even regarding the contest for guardianship of the Saint’s realm, he considered naught the interests of his foe.
His own desires art his only guide.
What profit lies in pondering those whom thou wouldst assail and plunder?
Even among us Olympian gods, such a level of heedlessness provokes sheer dismay.
“Truly, the god worshipped by Vikings and berserkers is beyond measure!”
“‘Tis madness that their chief god also take the mantle of a grim reaper…!”
So say Anubis and Lord Michizane, recoiling in dismay.
Seeing them so, Odin quickly attempts to defend himself.
Is there truly room for thee to plead thy case now?
“Nay, wait! Ye do me wrong by likening me to some savage brute. I, too, can engage in fair exchange if I so desire! See this single eye of mine! Know ye why I possess but one?”
I do not, nor do I wish to (and I do recall this was said before).
“This missing eye was offered in trade for the wisdom and knowledge dwelling in Mimir’s Well! Is that not proof that I honor the law of equivalent exchange? I sacrificed an eye for enlightenment! Dost that not earn me some credit?”
Surely thou misunderstood the “equivalent” in that exchange.
Thine sense of cost and gain is askew because thou art unpracticed in commerce.
“Cease seeking shortcuts to knowledge! True wisdom comes from daily, diligent study. Such is the way of scholarship!”
So declares Lord Michizane, furious.
“Then I shall offer this remaining eye to claim the Saint’s soul. Let none complain of that cost!”
We want it not! That shall be a cause for complaint indeed!
Keep thy remaining eye, man!
The Saint would be confounded beyond measure by such a horrifying bargain!
“Hmph… If so, then I must seize him by force…!”
Stop!
Cease this madness at once, thou truly art the most fearsome of gods among us!
“But at this rate, we wander in circles with no resolution. Now that our attempts at persuasion and display of merits bring no end, we must find another method to decide the matter.”
Which means… a contest of some sort?
Yet a violent feud would trouble many realms…
“Fret not!”
It is Grandfather Cronus who speaks!
“There art many peaceful ways to settle a matter. For instance… behold this!”
Momotaro D*ntetsu?!
Aye, a perfect method to declare winners and losers without crossing swords.
Though it risks the ruination of friendships…
“Excellent! I accept!”
“I shall show thee the cunning hand that made Osiris furious for three moons, such that he spake not a word unto me!”
The other gods show high enthusiasm.
Let us commence! But how many years shall we set for our game?
“Three hundred million.”
What?!
Which fool set the length so absurdly high?!
King Enma?!
Letting the King of Inflation choose the duration was a mistake!
“What babble is this? Three hundred million is far shorter than the one trillion six hundred sixty-five billion, three hundred million years one endures in the Hell of Revival. Three hundred million shall pass in but a blink.”
Uoooooooooh! This match shall be exceedingly long!
Prepare thyselves!
Hyaaaaaaaaaaah!!!
＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝
kurumada masami is the creator behind saint seiya.
think of momotaro dentetsu as the monopoly board game of japan
