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Bed and Break Fast
🕑 Added 2025-11-11 19:26:13 +0000 UTCThe wizard's tower was in the best part of town. On the King's Road itself, within a few minutes of walking to both the Arcane University and the castle, with all the best eating, shopping and recreation the city had to offer surrounding it. Anybody would have killed for the location... unfortunately, killing was not the main method of obtaining legitimate building permits. No, a far darker art had to be used to get such a prime location.
Property law. One of the journeymen who served under him at the Mages' Guild had rich parents, and those rich parents had mentioned offhand that the Duke of their fair city had been looking for more inns and taverns to draw in adventurers. Then, with some detailed study as to what exactly constituted an "inn" under city law, he realised that while he had to admit customers, he could limit that customer base to a very, very specific clientele. Only the strongest, most powerful adventurers would be allowed to grace his halls, and if anyone argued that there was no way that a world-shaking legend would come to crash on his spare bed, he'd say "it's a premium experience" and mail them back to the city council as a frog.
...at least, that was the plan. The reality? He was staring up at his first ever guest as he explained where the magic bathroom was.
Char was that reality. He was on a pilgrimage, of sorts, spreading the word of his goddess across the world, and he'd made a habit of staying at whatever inn-equivalent had the strangest limits. In this case, he probably would have been fine with a tavern, or even sleeping under the stars, but the specificity of the listing made him wonder if it wasn't divine provenance.
The tower only accepted large sized adventurers, which was why he'd found it, it would be nice to not have to fit twelve feet of horse on human-sized mattresses. The tower only accepted archmage-level magic users, which was fine by him, which made sense for a wizard’s tower really. The tower only accepted adventurers in the 'storm giant plus' strength range, which was -very- odd combined with the last request but he'd known a few dwarf wizards. It was the addendum that the accepted level of sexual activity was 'constant' that made him realize it was for him.
"Thank you for your direction," Char nodded politely at the tiny wizard that was explaining where everything was. A vanishment-capable bathroom would be the ideal kind of facilities for a guy his size, so he appreciated it. "If it is not too forward, may I ask if you face some trouble? The listing was specific enough for My Lady to guide me here, and it seems interesting that you should need a magic user as... sculpted... as myself."
Char was the trouble. But he was also the picture of professionalism. He had a mithral shield strapped to his arm and an enormous warhammer strapped to his back, but no armor. He had magic items stuck into every crevasse, but his clothes were humble. He had vestments of sparkling, polished white, but they were worn loose.
And didn't really cover that much, being entirely open on one side.
He wasn't just twice the wizard's height, he was at least four times his girth. Char had pecs like the tower's own foundation stones pushing over the top of his robe. His stole was caught on the underside of obliques built like handles, failing to hide abs like sculpted black marble; and the way it draped over a perfectly round, perfectly -enormous- shoulder covered in silk-shiny black fur reminded Nick of his crystal ball with a cover on it. The bicep -beneath- that shoulder.
Well...
Nick wasn't sure he had anything -that- big.
“Trouble? No, no trouble at all… can’t say I’ve got any brewing around here.” The rat’s head was tilted upwards at an uncomfortable angle just to try and look at the horse’s face. He had thought himself so slick when he filled out the forms to register this place as an in – just select the maximum option for every category, right? Nobody would show up, and he’d be able to do his thing in peace. Not the most elegant solution, but it meant he could go to that nice seafood restaurant and not have to walk all the way downtown.
Of course, that had meant he had to have the correct facilities available for guests of such… prodigious calibre. The most modern magically-equipped bathroom, of course, for which he was able to claim back a few crowns on taxes. The building itself was also large and roomy to fit bigger people – and those vaulted ceilings were very nice, he had to admit. He also had a vast bed, ready to fit just the type of patron he saw in front of him here and now!
...which he had been using as his own. Maybe he’d get lucky, though, and not get kicked out of his own bedroom. After all, this patron was rather handsome. “So, ah… adventurer, right? Or at least some kind of wanderer? What kind of god do you follow? Any cool powers?”
"Oh absolutely!" Char had been -asked-, that was so much better than finding a way to slide an advertisement sermon in on its own. "I follow Aria, the goddess of darkness, art, and sexual perfection. Of course I'm well trained in all the usual clerical arts, writing, dragon skull smashing, healing, and so on, but as a patron of the arts she offers the unique boon of waiving the cost of offerings for more expensive spells when they're used to create beauty. Such a misfortune, isn't it, that so many other gods require the vanishment of endless gems and gold? My Lady would rather add to the world!"
Char walked as he talked, a heavy stride that sent his legs wide in a way that confirmed he was hiding some pretty massive thighs under those robes to work around. The bedroom was lovely, thick blue sheets covering a giant sized bed. It looked very recently used, however, and Char began to wonder if there were any other guests here...
Well, whether there were or weren't, he could unpack a few things the same. He fished into a pouch on his belt and pulled out multiple massive jars, thick, 100 pound pottery with fitted ceramic lids that he grabbed three at a time, hooking fingers under the handles and sliding them over the dressers with practiced ease.
Nick ground his teeth together a little as he watched his guest unpacking. At first, he was content to watch those thick thighs as the horse bent over and arranged ceramic jars… then more, and more. Spell components? Offerings to the Lady Aria? ...juice? “Ah, yeah! Well, Arcane caster here, so I’ve just kind of… taken into account the cost of doing business, y’know. Sexual perfection, huh? Interesting domain. Guess you must be popular out on the road…”
The rat flicked his tail back and forth as he watched, getting truly rather curious about those ceramics. Maybe that was his hobby? Or pottery could have been his art, if his goddess liked her clerics to practice something… religion certainly wasn’t his strong suit, beyond an interest in making sure that nothing from off-plane wanted to kill him for his research.
“...so were you always that big? Perhaps that’s an awkward question… forgive me, I’m just interested in the first guest I’ve had in…” The rat’s eyes flicked up as he tried to recall. “Uh, yes. The first guest I’ve had inside.”
"I try not to brag. Though you did ask for 'constant' levels of sexually active," Char nodded along, but began to focus in on the rat. Nobody else here, eh? "Not too many guests, though? Something went wrong? You really can tell me what you'd need somebody of my qualifications for... or... perhaps not. Twitch a tail if there's mind control."
Char was immediately handsy. Grappling the rat, examining his skull with a massive, calloused hand. He wasn't... rough... though there was certainly nothing physical Nick could do to escape as the massive beast started giving him an impromptu medical examination, faint, cloudy purple light shining from his hands. Hands that ran over his pecs, cupping half his torso easily. Hands that felt his butt, massive palms covering his cheeks. Hands that could hold even his massive balls.
"Hmm, you seem fine, apologies, I usually have to check," Char withdrew, "But no, I have not. Bodybuilding qualifies as an art, you see."
Nick had been out of the adventuring game for too long. He was a little stunned when the cleric simply scooped him up to poke and prod him (most people would be, he reassured himself) and simply... let it happen. Though perhaps he had been out of the game for too long in some other aspects, too... as the horse gripped at his skull there was a brief twitch of his dick as he remembered a particularly handsy minotaur. For all the city comforts, there had been some good times out there adventuring instead of making fat stacks of gold coins casting spells for the wealthy.
"Er, nope, no mind control here..." he murmured, before taking a moment to stretch out. "Ah, yes, of course. Self-sculpture. And not the way arcane casters do it, either, though you can have some real fun with the artificial stuff..." Nick stroked at his chin a little as he thought for a moment. "Oh, and, uh... no, I didn't ask for constant levels of sexual activity, that's just... that's who's allowed to come. Uh, you said that your goddess guided you here? What would a goddess want with this place?"
The thought was slightly unnerving as the rat fixed his hair, pulling it back neatly into place after having been slightly put out of place by the groping. He neatly fixed up blue robes, staring over at the bed. Man, he did not want to sleep in the workshop tonight.
"That's a good question," Char hmmed over the question, looking around more seriously. What -was- here. It was clearly a dark wizard's tower of some sort. Plenty of magical projects based on life draining, necromancy, magic item creation, less demon summoning than expected... all the usual suspects really.
The rat himself wasn't half bad either, bottom heavy, massive balled, currently hard due to his exposure to Char's body...
"Well, unless you're planning on planeshifting anywhere soon, I'd say either I'm here to help with a project or just have you worship my cock." He said. Still formally. Even though he was already starting to disrobe.
"...no, wasn't planning on leaving... and the only really big project I have right now is trying to combine Sending and Major Illusion so that people can send me pictures of their-" Ah, well, there was a live example in the room, wasn't there? He watched those massively muscular thighs shift as Char removed his clothing, and figured that he could take his own robe off.
"Can I admit something? Nobody ever actually comes here by design, so I just use this one as my bedroom. In fact you are quite possibly the only eligible guest I have seen for... quite some time. If you could see your way to not kicking me out of the room tonight, then maybe it'll help you out with that whole, uh, "constant" thing."
"Ahhhhhh." That made a few things click into place quite quickly. "To be honest, I had wondered why you asked for a perfect man. You simply weren't expecting to find one," Char continued his strip tease rather more sensually after that. Inch by inch he revealed himself. His sheath was massive, the wrinkled black slit at the top going almost to his navel like a happy trail, rapidly widening.
And widening.
And widening.
Char revealed inch after inch of gaping hole, the slit where his cock hid alone was over a foot in sheer diameter.... and his balls dwarfed them quite a bit. It was honestly impressive he could walk so smoothly, given the size of the faintly furred, jet black, absolute fucking MONSTERS he was sliding his vestments over.
His balls were so big that... his balls were so round that...
Well.
Nick could probably fit a -person- inside them if they curled up.
And they weren't unadorned either. Golden tattoos of holy symbols that actively glowed sprawled across their surface, along with runic script in an ancient language, the nuts almost as tightly wrapped in spells as in skin.
"So sorry to disappoint, then."
“You will find me, sir, most assuredly not disappointed whatsoever.” Now… that was interesting. Nick winced slightly at the glow, but his eyes adjusted to the sight after a moment. As a mage, he was used to a few bright flashes, after all. Perhaps a wisecracker might add that the horse’s striptease was, in fact, the brightest flash he had ever seen, but his mind was focused.
Well, mostly. He wanted to experience that shaft for himself, of course, but those gargantuan balls and their unusual ornamentation were sparking a deeper academic curiosity, even as his dick throbbed with eagerness. He was caught by just how good the visitor smelled, too – the olfactory equivalent of being held at night by someone far too big to move. Strong, comfortable in its way, but definitely present.
“Say, ah… what do all those do, if you don’t mind my asking? That’s certainly a lot of concentrated runework. Must have been a real bitch to place on there without disrupting any of the interlocking pieces...” Nick dared to step closer, adjusting his glasses as he looked at the nuts, feeling their warmth radiate across his face as he leant in.
Well it helps that I keep adding more space for the new work~" Char's tail flicked around, pushing the rat's nose just a -little- deeper as he examined them carefully. "But the central bits are fairly standard! Having your holy symbol tattooed on your body is a pretty standard act of faith, and a way to ensure it's always with you, so obviously I started with that. Then from there I went for magic capture and recycling networks, so that any 'waste' energy from my spellcasting stuck around. Then I got a -heavily- enchanted network to use that magic to amplify channeled energy..."
Char's balls let out a rumble. A deep, ominous rumble that made Nick almost lose his grip on the floor as his tower lurched... and his vision started to eclipse. The largest, blackest, fattest-flared, most obscenely massive dick jumped out of the sheath above him by an entire foot... which just about covered the head... before it started extending further six inches at a time and didn't seem like stopping, bobbing heavily as the ladder-piercings that ran down it a -very- far distance flicked past the sheathe on emerging.
"...Then of course after that I was becoming -dangerously- virile, so I started adding runes of control and suppression. LOTS of those. Until I got an injunction from the goddess about that. Now most new space gets used for her to write something sassy on. I think this one right here," Char slid Nick's nose to a blazing part of the swelling spheres that was hard to focus on, "Says "God Daddy" in the divine language of creation. I can't actually pronounce it myself."
Nick might, had he not been enraptured so, been mildly irritated at being whipped by the tail. Instead the little course corrections went without statement as he was drawn closer, examining the holy symbol. He had to push his glasses up to let his natural short-sightedness focus better on all the detail work. His less-natural magic senses did their best to aid in turn, though the intensity of all those prepared runes was quite… imposing.
He looked up to see the ladder piercings in the corner of his eye, marking the way down that length like road markers. He half suspected that was what they were used for, in reality; an easy way to track just how capable a given bottom was before assigning them a letter grade. He chewed his lip a little, thinking about just how easily the horse could bottom out on any given person he knew.
“Oh, that? Ah, I know a little, I think you pronounce it-” The word – or whatever approximation of a word the rat tried to pronounce – didn’t quite catch on the rat’s gullet. Contrarily, it escaped his lips all too freely, given a push. After all, it seemed right enough in his mouth. God Daddy.
When he blinked his eyes open again, he found his tongue buried in the horse’s sheath as more cock spilled out, the great throbbing length grinding against his cheek as his body stood up against those massive, taut nuts. “Say, ah… just apropos of nothing, if I said that a lot of my work was focused on being as invincible as possible through various means, would that be of any use to you?”
The rat swallowed a little, leaning back only a fraction to get his face out of the horse’s crotch. If a goddess was giving him playful names like that, then how powerful was this figure? “And if it was, you wouldn’t need, say, a pet in this part of the world, would you?”
Char raised an eyebrow at that, "Invincible, eh? Bold words. Though..." and quickly a testing hand started to grope the rat again, this time much more roughly. A giant finger teased his asshole, stripping the last from him, teasing around his ring before going inside. Char pulled at the edges to see how stretchy he was as his other hand wrapped around Nick's own.
Char's massive mitts engulfed Nick's hand almost entirely, pressing against him somewhat appraisingly. Char squeezed tighter. Tighter than the world's most aggressive handshake. But Nick was fine. Char pressed his fingers against Nick's own, bone bending and -flattening- before the horse released him. But Nick was fine. Char -crushed-, light shining from his hands as he pressed hard enough for the air to feel it, Nick's spellcasting fingers spaghettified by the force of a black hole. But he was fine. They sprang back the instant Char released, before he had a chance to start healing and regretting.
Char smiled. He really might not have to hold back.
"Well if I could boast an -invincible- pet, then how could I turn that down," Char grabbed the bed, and a wave of purple shot through it, reinforcing it, before he gently pushed the rat over onto the modified mattress.
"Make yourself comfortable," Char began to finger his piercings, one hand circling his cum slit as he started to pour pearlescent pre as thick as gelatin, rubbing the natural lotion across a dick bigger than Nick was, the flood just growing and growing until it had spurted hundreds of times a giant's orgasm - or just enough to lube Char's monster. "I try to be a 'generous' lover in most ways."
There was really only one thing that anyone could say when their hand was turned into an ultra-flat abomination against healthy bone structure, and as Nick unclenched his teeth from a locked jaw so tight it would crack weaker teeth, he exhaled and said it.
“Ow.”
A lot of the necromantic texts around the tower were genuine, and some of them were genuinely evil, yes. Nick had no ambitions of raising an undead army, though, no dreams of conquering the town and ushering in a thousand years of darkness. The powers over life and death, though, were very handy to have in one’s back pocket. A step beyond the damage resistance and respawning of a lich – it was a good start towards doing whatever the hell one wanted with their extensive magical abilities. If what one wanted was to take a cock that far outsized their body, then…
Nick looked up as Char cast a shadow over him. Every spurt of precum came with a considerable deluge across his body, only some of that elixir finding its way onto Char’s rod as that impossibly thick flare loomed. He was more than wet, he was utterly drenched with cum – perhaps being a beaver might be better than being a rat right now? There was little time for extra spellcasting, though, as he felt that gargantuan rod pressing at his ass. As a strong spurt of precum sprayed inside him like a pressure washer, even that lubrication gave him the feeling that Char was about to try to fit an entire elephant into a mousehole.
Well. A rat hole, but who was counting?
