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Be a Dragon: A Rose with Thorns (ch.17)

🕑 Added 2020-06-10 15:00:23 +0000 UTC

Comments

Ahtu Nyarlathotep

Bye bye novel. I think you could have been saved with a simple rewrite/tweaking of this chapter, and some toughing it out. But I suppose "what-ifs" are generally pretty useless if you don't/can't act on them... I will miss you though... There was story to be told here, it just didn't have time to ripen.

iTEX

Took the words out of my mouth... Having a random wild Rose appear didn't make me do anything other then role my eyes. Having the SI be successfully baited made me cringe, having him owe her a favor made me go "great we're getting a tsundere love interest 🙄". Would highly recommend dropping and rewriting this as it pretty effectively killed any emotional connection the reader has with dragon dumbass. Not that he wasn't already getting hard to read with how emo he has been. Artificial drama doesn't drive a story, plot and character development do. This chapter reeks with foreshadowing for future drama that only teen girls enjoy.

Anonymous Daniel

It's great I guess that you have a logical gacha point for why the SI acted like a complete dunce. Still doesn't change the fact that emotionally I no longer connect with him and instead find him to be the equivalent of a retarded harem protagonist. Dense as neutronium. There is no emotional connection between me as a reader and the SI any more. So all of the fun has been sucked out of this particular storyline. Especially since this entire chapter also comes across as exceedingly railroaded. It's like a dozen specific tropes where played straight here with no variation to spice it up. As soon as I saw the si was fighting I knew he was in a simulation, that his girlfriend was watching, that some asshole would walk in and start a fight, that the asshole would "win" on a technicality, and that the SI would be oh so grateful for getting his ass beat finding some kind of lesson to be learned from the experience. That was before I finished the first paragraph.

Ahtu Nyarlathotep

You do have something of a point here. The plot is slowing down exponentially currently. He will have to let the MC make significant progress soon, one way or another. Or we will forever be getting stuck in a rabbit hole. He does need to have his setbacks, but also need to make strides.

Ahtu Nyarlathotep

Didn't like the lack of creativity displayed by the MC. But I do like that he taken down a peg or two. I'd just prefer it, if it was done by a more worthy opponent, and if he performed a bit better before going down.

Ahtu Nyarlathotep

Or he could use the white flames to create an ideal prison to contain her on the spot.

Ahtu Nyarlathotep

Mmm, not sure I love his obvious lack of creativity... So many things he could have selectively destroyed with his flame... Her weapons, her stamina, her will to fight him, the distance between her and the sea(teleport her into the middle of the ocean), her resistance to suggestion, her ability to move, her enhanced abilities, her sense of reality, her combat expertise. The flames can undo anything, so have them undo her as a threat.

Zephraim Dotson

I liked this chapter, it was the only way to actually push our guy out of his rut. Good job.

IdeasGuy

Rose was the Bad Guy in that encounter, so yes, she would have. Had Nero been the Bad Guy, he would have won the moment that he popped up behind Rose. But since Heroes don't kill, he was at the disadvantage.

Anonymous Daniel

Unless your saying rose was willing to shove that piece of glass into his throat he won that encounter.

Anonymous Daniel

That's like 25% of my issue at most with this chapter. The other 75% is the pure hypocracy of rose and the slow growth of just how tiring the while civilian plotline is to read.

IdeasGuy

I can't tell you to not have an opinion, but I've hammered the point home repeatedly throughout the story that Nero is very much a civilian in mindset. He runs from emotional problems unless he's in a situation where he's forced to confront them. In terms of how he fought --, Nero doesn't have the experience nor the mindset to properly leverage his powers. Which is something else I've repeatedly reinforced throughout the story. Right now, he's stuck at a level where he's treating them as a hammer and everything is a nail. When it came to dealing with the robots, something that didn't require a gentle touch, he tore right through them. When it came to holding back, the first time he ended up 'killing' two people, and the second attempt he would have crippled the Suicide Squad, much like how he had crippled Gizmo. Except that they were fake people, and Rose wasn't. She wasn't a problem that he could use a hammer on, and because of that, he lost.

Anonymous Daniel

Not a fan of this update. Honestly this whole update might have ruined me for this storyline.


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