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IBHJ Chapter 786
🕑 Added 2024-04-13 04:55:38 +0000 UTCShirou looked at Skadi's deathly pale face and sighed. "Shisho, what happened to you?" With another sigh, he walked to the cave entrance and sat down cross-legged in case Jörmungandr made a sneak attack.
Skadi regained consciousness in a daze. As she recalled what had happened before she passed out, she tried to sit up, but then noticed the white cloak covering her body and the spinning object emitting light nearby.
Shirou was sitting at the cave entrance, observing the flooded land. When he noticed movement behind him, he turned his head and saw that Skadi had woken up.
"You're awake."
She handed the cloak back to him, avoiding eye contact.
"Thank you," she said softly, still avoiding his gaze.
Glancing at the frost that still clung to her body, he asked, "Your divinity..."
"It's nothing. I just lost control for a moment," she stated flatly as if she hadn't just fainted.
His puzzlement only grew at her response. "You can lose control of your divinity?"
"I'm a High Servant, so my divinity is complex and compound. It's different from typical divinity." Skadi glanced at him. "It means I'm a bit special and different from the others. But if I push myself too hard, these different divinities can cause problems."
Shirou raised an eyebrow. High Servants were formed from multiple heroic spirits combined into a single Saint Graph. Thirteen years ago, when he fought against Crimson Moon, he had used Crimson Moon's fragments to become a High Servant himself. Since High Servants were a combination of multiple heroic spirits, if too much power was exerted and the ideals of the component heroic spirits differed significantly, it could lead to instability in the High Servant's existence.
"If you're not feeling well, you should stay in the cave and rest up."
"It's okay, I can handle it." She leaned against the cave wall for support.
"Don't push yourself too hard. Aren't you being a bit tough on yourself?"
"No, this is nothing."
"You're overdoing it. Why do you have to force yourself? It's clear you're struggling... don't you realize there are people who care about you and will worry?"
Skadi gently curled up her long legs and buried her face between her knees. "There are people who will worry about me?"
The sea breeze blew into the cave, making the goddess's long hair flutter. She spoke slowly, "I've always known that the people I protect are all depending on me. I don't have anyone important in my life, and no one sees me as important to them. It's not my kindness, but my weakness that has hurt them. I'm afraid... In the end, I'm not really the Aesir god of this world, nor am I a giant. I'm just a lonely being without anyone... I don't have anyone..."
Skadi wasn't the cold goddess anymore. In that moment, she was just a fragile girl. Shirou looked at her trembling figure in the darkness.
After confirming the truth of that dream, he finally understood why Skadi was always cold to him but never angry. It wasn't because she had a soft heart, but because she was his teacher, Scathach. He also realized why sometimes he would have wicked thoughts towards her and sometimes wouldn't. It had nothing to do with her beauty, but because from long ago, she was the person another version of him respected and admired, while there were some who also loved her. And who knows how many versions of him felt the same way?
Seeing Scathach's lonely figure in the darkness, he couldn't help but walk up to Skadi and wrap his arms around her.
"W-What are you doing, Eternal King?" She was startled.
"If you keep going like this, you'll not only hurt yourself but also those who really care about you," Shirou said softly.
Skadi tried to push him away, putting her hands on his shoulders, but he wouldn't let go. Even the bone-chilling cold couldn't make him give up the hug.
"Don't do this. You're too heavy."
Even if she said so... This feeling... she felt strangely calm and warm. But why? Why did she feel something like this? Could it be... No. I am Skadi. There's no way I'd have strange feelings for humans...
Feeling his warmth, Skadi's body grew a bit weak, and she felt uneasy, trying to find a distraction. Then she remembered his Command Spells.
"Oh, now that I think about it, why do you have a contract with me?"
"Because you're my Shisho, Scathach," Shirou said. "Even though we only met recently... I've always been your contracted Master."
"That can't be right. Scathach and I..." Skadi was confused. She felt her mind getting a bit chaotic. These connections had already crossed the boundaries of time and space.
"Don't you remember?"
"Remember what...?"
"The dream..."
"Wait, you're saying we had the same dream?"
He smiled, "And in that dream, there was a little boy who kept calling you 'teacher'."
Skadi stared at him in disbelief.
"That's right. It was me. At some point in time, in the endless cycle of reincarnation... I'm your master and your student."
"Impossible. Don't make things up. That boy...it couldn't be you!" Skadi looked like she'd been provoked. She'd never been this angry before, not even when Hildr pierced her. Even at her weakest, Skadi had never been angry. But this was different when it came to the boy in her dream. Because that dream, that person, was the spiritual support that helped her endure two thousand years of loneliness.
—"Teacher, if you ever face danger, I'll definitely come to save you, I'll definitely protect you..."
Remembering that unforgettable promise, as if it was engraved in her soul, Skadi felt both sorrow and anger.
She was weak and could be bullied, but she refused to let anyone desecrate her spiritual support. It was the only thing that cared about her, valued her, and helped ease her loneliness. Even if that person was just an illusion, she wouldn't allow anyone to tarnish that feeling. Skadi glared at him fiercely, her already chaotic divinity becoming even more turbulent. More ice formed on her skin, as if she were about to shatter.
Seeing this, he wrapped his arms around her tightly and shouted, "Calm down, shisho! Don't get worked up like this."
"I don't want your concern. I'm not your shisho. Just let me go!" Skadi pushed against him with her hands, trying to break free from his hug.
Seeing Skadi pushing herself despite her dangerous state, he clenched his teeth. "I'm not letting go. How can you expect me not to care about you? I said I won't abandon you. If you ever face danger, how could I go back on my word? I'll definitely come to save you, I'll definitely protect you."
Skadi's stubborn hands softened, and she turned her head to the side. "Is this the price of weakness?"
Shirou placed one hand on her waist and the other on her trembling hand, asking seriously, "Tell me, how can I save you?"
"You can't save me," Skadi said, struggling to get the words out. "My divinity have already begun to separate. If it continues, the divinity within my body will completely separate from each other and return to nature. Even the gods who are well-versed in these matters are helpless when it comes to the separation of divinity..."
Shirou pursed his lips tightly, "Isn't there any other way?"
The implications of the separation of divinity for Skadi were self-evident. Skadi's existence relied on the divinity of the Norse gods and the body of Scathach. If the divinity separated, then she herself would also... How could Shirou allow that to happen? His memories had already returned through dreams. The person in front of him was the one he had loved deeply in the previous cycle. But in the end, the result was separation once again.
If that were the case, It would be better not to recall this memory, as it would only bring sadness. Did he really have no way to stop Skadi from disappearing? Why was he always so powerless? Even now, when he had become so powerful with many Servants under his banner, what was the point of having all this useless power? Shirou pondered for a moment, and at this time, he remembered something. His eyes narrowed as an idea struck him. "I think I know how to solve your divinity's problem."
She gave him a bitter smile. "There's no way, Eternal King."
"Maybe not in this world, but in the past, there was a way."
"What are you..."
Comments
JeanMartin Freites
This was a much needed moment between these two.
