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The Queen's New Pet (Mini Story)
🕑 Added 2019-10-02 04:59:44 +0000 UTCBillie, a palace serving girl, was dragged before the queen. She had been caught stealing ham from the queen's personal larder and her majesty did not suffer thieves well.
"Please, your grace, have mercy. I only took but one slice of ham for my luncheon." Billie begged.
"Stealing is stealing. It matters not whether you stole one slice or everything in the kitchen." The queen said firmly. "If food and ham is what you desire, then that it what you will have. Guards! Take her away as we discussed."
The guards dragged the begging servant girl away from the queen's chambers. But instead of the gaol or the stocks, they took her the pig pens of a nearby farm.
Ten months later, the queen visited the pens with one of her ladies in
She now five times bigger than she was last they met, easily the biggest member of the swine herd. She moved through the mud on her hands and knees, crawling towards a large trough and eating from it face first. Her body was almost completely encrusted in wet and dried dirt, though you could still see tiny welts and scars from a switch marring her saggy behind and flabby back fat, likely given to her by the farmer during her "re-education."
"How's our little food thief doing?" The queen asked.
Billie, not noticing their approach, was startled and removed her face from the swill filled trough. Too fat to stand, she sat in the mud and attempted to do a curtsy, much to the amusement of the queen and her companion.
"Please, your majesty. Oink! Oink!" Billie said, having been instructed to oink and grunt like a pig every time she talked. "Please, grant me clemency and permit me to leave. Oink!"
Billie then let out a fart so long and strong it caused the mud to bubble around her for a few seconds. Even among the large swine herd, her stench dominated the air around them.
"A thousands pardons, grace. Oink, oink. But I can't control it. Oink." Billie said, face red with embarrassment.
"Fear not." The queen replied. "Your days in the pen have come to an end. Your size makes you ill suited to return as a serving girl, so from now on you will have a new occupation, one where you may eat all the food you like."
The snicking lady in waiting approached Billie and unwrapped a package she had been carrying: a hand knit, full body pig costume with fake snout and hoof styled mittens and booties.
"Let's get you cleaned up and then we can discuss what being the royal pet entails."
