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Darkest Before Dawn - 91
🕑 Added 2024-12-19 17:51:32 +0000 UTCChapter 91
[Kazuki Endo]
“You sure you’ll be fine?” Nemuri asked, feeling very worried as she stood at the door of his apartment, fidgeting with her purse and visibly hesitating to leave. Kazuki appreciated it but…
“I think I’m fine,” he said and that was the truth… of a sort. He mostly felt oddly calm, if that made any sense. “I’ll… Call if I need help, alright?”
“Do that,” she replied with a sad smile, before letting go of her purse and pulling him in a quick hug. “If not me, then Hina or someone else, alright? We’re here if you need us,” Nemuri told him, holding his shoulders and looking directly into his eyes. “Is that clear?”
“Crystal,” he answered with a weak smile. “Honestly… I don’t even know how to feel.”
“I guess that’s better than some alternatives,” Nemuri said with an unsure smile of her own. “Is it bad that I think it’s great?” she asked then. Kazuki wondered if she was nervous, ashamed and guilty because she was happy for what happened, or because she thought the fact would upset him.
“I don’t know?” he answered, being as honest as he could, given the circumstances. “I’m still processing things.”
“Well, once you figure out what you feel, let someone know, alright? Don’t shut us out,” Nemuri said and Kazuki was fairly sure that she was thinking about the Post-Sports Festival thing. That had obviously worried his minders, even if it had all gotten resolved without major stuff happening. It was still very much in their minds, Kazuki guessed.
“Okay,” he replied with a nod, unsure of what else to do or say. It seemed to be enough though, given Nemuri’s small smile. Then the woman pulled him closer and gave him a kiss on the forehead before letting go.
“Good boy. Don’t stay up too late, alright? See you tomorrow,” the woman told him before stepping out of the door and waving at him. She didn’t walk away though, waiting – as always – for him to close the door.
“I’ll try,” he mumbled, because he wasn’t sure he’d be able to sleep. His mind wasn’t doing much thinking, but it was certainly loud all the same. He didn’t know if he’d manage to get any sleep done. “See you tomorrow,” he added, much more sure, with a slight smile.
And then he was once more alone at his apartment.
Almost on autopilot, he moved to sit in front of his aquarium. Then he just sat there, following the inhabitants of the fish tank around, looking at the plants, the substrate, the wood and rock hardscape. He listened to the quiet hum of the filter and the fountain sound of the water dropping back into the aquarium from it.
He wasn’t really paying all that much attention, but it gave him something to latch onto instead of his mind loudly repeating the conversation he’d had over the phone and what it had informed him of. It’d been almost an hour by then and Kazuki still didn’t know… anything. He didn’t know how to feel. He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t even know why he was so confused and out of it.
‘My mother was arrested,’ he thought to himself, as if doing that would help him get some answers or start properly processing the news. It did neither and Kazuki could only sigh, slumping back on his chair. He almost wished he hadn’t been informed.
Although, Nezu had told him that he felt it necessary to do so, since he was a sort-of public figure and he shouldn’t find out through questions in the morning- ‘Fuck, that’s gonna be a nightmare,’ he realized then, feeling himself pale and weaken. He was not looking forward to the interviews he’d get the following day, because there was no way it wouldn’t be brought up.
With a groan, he dragged his hand down his face.
Then he reached for his phone, because much as he wanted to just shut off for the rest of the day, he couldn’t. He needed help and not only with the mess he was going to have to deal with. Hell, he wouldn’t even know where to begin addressing that, but there was one thing he knew then and there. He needed to prepare for the morning and there was one very good way to do that.
It also helped that Kazuki imagined it’d make him feel better.
“Hello hello, what can I do for my favorite male intern?”
“I was your only male intern,” he replied, a smile already forming on his face. “And… I need help.”
“Still my favori-... What happened?” Hina asked, likely realizing the shift in his voice.
“My mom was arrested,” he answered, bluntly and to the point. He didn’t have it in him to try and be more elaborate or anything, honestly. He didn’t even want to talk about the issue but… Needs must.
“No offense, but good riddance,” Hina replied, just as bluntly and Kazuki thought he got a vindictive edge in her voice. He found it odd, actually. Was she angry at his mother on his behalf? It shouldn’t have been a weird notion, he supposed, but he still found it to be such, at least to him. It was like he couldn’t quite comprehend that someone was angry for him. “Are we celebrating or… Oh, right… Fuck.”
He snorted. He couldn’t help it, really. Something about that response struck him as hilarious. Or maybe he was more out of it than he thought. It might have even been both things at the same time. He wouldn’t know.
“Right. We have to prepare you for tomorrow,” Hina said, obviously having realized the issue. “Tell me everything and we’ll figure this out,” she told him and Kazuki’s smile widened the smallest bit.
Hearing her say “we” was more reassuring than anything at that very moment.
It was like everything was easier than it had been a moment before.
He wasn’t alone.
[}-o-{]
[Toshiaki Matsumura]
“You mean to say that you didn’t even know your mother was arrested?” one of his fellow reporters asked and Toshi almost wanted to laugh. They’d been trying to get the boy to slip up for half an hour already and credit where credit was due, Endo really was good.
Because Toshi was sure that he’d known about what happened, but there he was, denying it like a pro. If not for his Quirk, he wouldn’t have been able to tell, which meant that all the other reporters around definitely didn’t, unless they had a similar tool. From what he was picking up though, that wasn’t the case.
Good on Endo, he supposed.
It also made his job easier.
“The closest to an interaction with my mother I’ve had since she divorced my father was her interview after the Sports Festival,” Endo said and Toshi held back a grimace. Well, that was… very sad, to say the least. No matter how many times he was hit with bombs like those though, he couldn’t help but pity the guy. Certainly made him feel better about being there and working for free, basically.
“What do you think about her arrest though?” a new voice asked and the boy turned to give the man a somewhat confused, somewhat bored look.
“Given that I don’t even know what she was arrested for, I don’t think I can have an opinion at all. I also haven’t seen her since a while back, as I just said. I have no idea what she’s been doing or what she could have done. At this point, she’s almost a stranger,” Endo answered and Toshi was sure that was a true statement. He really didn’t know what had happened.
“A stranger? Even if you haven’t interacted, she still raised you for long enough that you should remember,” another vulture asked, happily poking at the wound she saw. “You saying that you don’t care?” Toshi’s Quirk fed it all to him, the sadistic twitches on the woman’s face, the hopeful turn of the other reporters, the ever so slight stiffening of Endo.
He had a question ready at the tip of his tongue to shift the interview, but he didn’t manage to get the words out.
“We didn’t have the best of relationships, as I’ve explained in other interviews,” Endo replied, even more bored than before, but there was some sadness there. That’d prevent many of the indifferent claims reporters could try to make. He’d covered himself well. “Now, if that’s all-”
“Could I ask a question?” a voice called and Endo paused.
“Ah, Miss Kizuki, right? From Shuwaysha?”
“Shoowaysha,” the blue-skinned woman corrected goodnaturedly. Toshi had seen, in his many appearances close to Endo, that the woman and him seemed to get along fairly well. Not entirely unheard of for a reporter to get along with a public figure – he’d know, considering his own situation at that very moment –, but… That wasn’t quite as good a thing as some might have thought. Kizuki was… The woman unnerved Toshi. There was something there, something that he couldn’t figure out even after years of knowing her and using his Quirk to try and get a better read of her. Not even the best of his enhanced perception could he find all the pieces and where they went in the puzzle. “Can I ask about your time in UA?” the woman said and everyone seemed to pause at that, from Endo to the other reporters and even Toshi himself.
“My time in UA?” the boy asked, clearly caught off guard. Maybe that was Kizuki’s angle? To unbalance him before striking? If so, it was certainly working. He’d have to be alert.
“What’s your opinion on the school? Do you think it’s good for you? How do you see your own progress?” the woman shot, question after question seeming more and more out of the blue. Endo recovered fast though, Toshi would give him that.
“In order, I think UA is great. Definitely can see why it’s as highly regarded as it is,” Endo started with. Smart that he didn’t call UA the best or the number one school. Although that was its reputation, it wasn’t a fact and his opinion could easily be twisted to turn into an antagonistic statement against other schools. “I think it’s wonderful for me. I have all the space and time and support I need to develop, academically and practically. And without sacrificing safety, since there’s always heroes around and alert in case any of us messes up. I feel like a completely different person from who I was when I joined and it’s only been the first term.”
“That’s great to hear. You mentioned before that it allowed you opportunities to improve your Quirk usage. Could you elaborate on that?” Kizuki asked and Toshi twitched. He really didn’t get what the woman was trying to do, considering that was nowhere near the topic of the day when it came to Endo. Those were still certainly questions to ask though.
He wasn’t surprised though, every single time Toshi saw her there, she’d ask questions along those lines at some point.
Maybe she was helping out a preferred contact with easier questions than the usual topics?
“For sure. The training facilities offer a lot of space, for one, but also a lot of tools and a safe environment for me to use my Quirk. There’s supervision and many other safety measures in place too. I can also train with everyone else, my classmates, people from other classes and such, which offers me lots of opportunities to test my limits,” Endo explained, sounding almost happy to answer the questions now. That was certainly a topic he appreciated and Kizuki looked like she was having the time of her life too. “I feel like I have a much deeper understanding and much better control of my Quirk than I ever did or hoped to have before.”
“That’s great to hear,” the woman said, beaming at the boy. “Now, I do believe you have classes to attend to, so don’t let us hold you up,” she added, single-handedly cutting off everyone else as she gave the boy an out. Something that Toshi had been waiting to do himself when things looked like they’d spiral.
‘Easiest job ever,’ he thought, but he was still suspicious…
Alas, something to think about later. For the moment, he had something to do. Thus, he took his phone from his pocket and started making a call. He knew she would pester him to no end if he didn’t give a report quickly.
“How did it go?”
“You trained that boy well,” he commented, glancing over his shoulder to see Endo walking through the gates and into UA. “He did great.”
“Of course he did,” she said, and he could almost hear the smug smile on her face. “Didn’t even have to try that hard. He’s a natural.”
“I’ll take your word for it, Hina.”
[}-o-{]
[Kazuki Endo]
“You don’t have to wait for me, you know?” he commented, catching up with Minoru after getting inside the halls of UA. With a groan, he cracked his neck and took a deep breath in. The morning had been stressful, expectedly, and that really wasn’t the kind of thing he needed right when he was still recovering from the exam period.
“And I don’t, not really. If I arrive early, I just go to the classroom. If I don’t, I might as well be late or almost late with you,” his friend commented and Kazuki smiled. Maybe Minor thought it was nothing much, maybe it wasn’t anything much, but he’d always appreciate the little gestures more. Or, at least, he did then and there. Time would tell if he ever got used to them, he supposed.
“I guess, but let’s make sure we aren’t late, yeah?” Kazuki said, mind already going to the classes they’d have. Things had calmed down plenty now that the term was over and there was a break around the corner, but that didn’t mean the teachers had let up. They weren’t that lucky.
“I was told that things are going well, you know?” Minoru commented out of nowhere and Kazuki blinked. “I should be seeing more growth, or so I was told,” his friend added and he had to hold back a chuckle. Well, apparently someone was excited about that news and couldn’t wait to talk about it. Although, really, Kazuki was just…
“Happy for you, man,” he replied, slowing down and grinning at his friend. He knew better than most – and maybe even better than Minoru himself – how much his height affected him at times. That’s why he always was careful not to push him in regards to that unless he didn’t pick up on much negativity.
“Once that happens, you gotta teach me your ways, man. You’re way too good at the socializing thing,” his friend said and Kazuki just stopped and blinked at him. “Don’t give me that! You have it way too easy talking to pretty girls. I’d know, I’m there to see it most of the time!”
“Need I remind you that that’s because you are part of the same group?”
“Yeah, but I’m way too nervous sometimes, and that’s with friends,” Minoru grumbled, looking away. Kazuki knew he felt kind of bad at times when dealing with the girls in their group, but he thought it was holding back his… tendencies. In a way, he guessed he was, but about more than just not messing up. “This is the most friends I’ve had, like… ever.”
“I mean, same,” he commented wryly. “And I’d say we are doing fine. You have to relax, man. If I’ve learned anything during all my acting lessons and such, it’s that you need to be able to be yourself,” Kazuki explained as best he could.
“I don't know if you noticed, but being myself is likely to get me slapped,” Minoru replied dryly and Kazuki just rolled his eyes. “What? I’m being serious. You’ve literally had to slap and kick me to keep me from messing up!”
“That’s because you’re an idiot. There’s more to you than being a pervert, man,” Kazuki said, exasperated. “There’s acting like an idiot and then there’s being yourself. Find the difference and you’ll be fine. Hell, it’s been a while since I’ve had to smack you. You’re doing great.”
“Really?”
“How in the world am I the one giving socializing advice between the two of us?” he asked back, looking up at the ceiling as if it would give him answers. It wasn’t enough that he had to help Shoto? What was up with his classmates when he was about even in their level of adjustment? “Yes, really,” he added, just in case. “And besides. They’ve put up with you when you were putting your foot in your mouth every other sentence. Now that you’re doing better, you’ll be fine.”
“I guess,” Minoru mumbled, deflating. “Doesn’t really help me with others, right?”
“As I said, you’re doing better. Anyone that doesn’t give you a chance isn’t worth it,” Kazuki told him, trying to be comforting, even if he found the situation hilarious and exasperating. “And you should tell us. We’ll deal with them.”
“Don’t make our friends sound like a mafia, Kazuki,” Minoru commented with a slight grin. At least he was feeling better though. Kazuki was happy with that. “But thank you.”
“Don’t mention it.”
“Also… Do you think I should visit Inui?”
“Yes,” Kazuki said instantly. He didn’t even need to know the reason for the question. If he felt the need to ask, then chances were that he should go. Worse come to worst, the counselor would just let him know and that’d be that.
“Hm… I’ve been hesitating to go again,” Minoru mumbled, looking anywhere but at Kazuki with his insecurity spiking. “I talked to him about how I feel, being so short, not having a great Quirk and… other things. I just… I don’t know how much it helps to just talk about it,” his friend said, but he couldn’t let that be.
As the number one fan of therapy and generally asking for help, Kazuki needed to keep him on the best path.
“It might seem useless at times, but just talking about something is better than bottling it up. You’ll feel better and it can help you look at things in a different way, somehow. Nevermind the fact that Inui can have some words of wisdom or advice to help you out,” he explained to Minoru, who was very much doubtful.
“I guess. It’s just…”
“It’s not easy asking for help, but there’s nothing wrong with that,” Kazuki told him, giving him a soft smile. “Do I look bad going to Inui all the time?”
“No! No, of course not,” Minoru exclaimed, clearly panicking a little. He was fine though. Kazuki knew he didn’t mean to insult him or anything. “Your situation is different from mine though. No offense, but you had a fucked up childhood, man.”
“None taken.”
“And I’m pretty sure Shoto did too. And Toru almost died in the USJ attack.”
“It’s not a competition where the most fucked up are the one that get the help, Minoru,” Kazuki told him with a snort. “It’s not about being worthy of getting help. You need help and you should get it. Just because we got it “worse” than you-,” he continued, making the quotation marks with his fingers. “-doesn’t mean you don’t deserve help too. Your issues are serious to you, and that means they are serious, period.”
“I… If you say so…”
“I do,” Kazuki told him firmly. “You’ve helped me and been there for me a lot, man. I can’t help you myself, but consider this me doing something for you. Go for it. It’ll help.”
“Right… I’ll go,” Minoru finally agreed and Kazuki smiled, feeling like he’d accomplished something. “For the record, I consider us even. You’ve helped me a lot too.”
“Sure, that works for me,” he said with a slight smile.
As he walked with his friend to class, Kazuki almost could forget what had happened.
[}-o-{]
“You alright, Boss?” Chikuchi asked him, and she wasn’t the first person to do so. It had escaped absolutely no one that he wasn’t having a great day. All his friends had asked him at least once, Minoru being the first shortly after their talk in the early morning. “You look… distracted.”
“I’m fine,” he answered simply, but it was obvious that he was getting nowhere. “... You’ll probably see it in the news as soon as you get back though, I guess. My mother was arrested,” he said bluntly, deciding it was better to get it over with.
Something that the girl clearly hadn’t expected, seeing as she needed a moment to process that.
“... You don’t talk much about that kind of thing, but I’ve seen your interviews and… I can put two and two together,” Chikuchi said, taking the seat beside him at the training facility bench. “Shouldn’t you be happy?”
“I should, shouldn’t I?” he asked back, leaning back and looking up at the high ceiling of the huge room. “Somehow, I’m not. I’m not even upset, really. I just… I don’t know how to feel, honestly.”
He’d talked about it with Inui already, actually, first thing after class. And…
“You’re allowed to be confused about your own feelings, Endo,” the counselor had told him. “What is more, it’s normal for you to not know exactly how to feel, especially in such a situation. Take your time and figure it out. No need to have that confusion making you feel worse for no reason.”
That was all well and good, but Kazuki was fairly sure his Quirk was determined to turn his confusion into shit feelings. After all, since he didn’t know how he felt, he had no way of separating his unsorted feelings from what he sensed. It sucked, but that was nothing new for him. Just another thing to deal with, business as usual.
“Anything I can do to help?” Chikuchi asked, feeling more than a little insecure. That made Kazuki feel worse, but it also gave him something to latch onto. Because if he wanted to help her, he needed to feel better. Now, he might not be able to do that on command, but he could act like it, at least a little. However, he didn’t want to act too much, considering all the times he’d been told not to hide how he felt, so…
“I’m not going to sort out my feelings anytime soon, I don’t think,” he commented, glancing towards the girl by his side and giving her a tired smile. “But I can at least not feel shitty, I guess. I just need a distraction.”
“Well, I can help with that, I think,” Chikuchi said, feeling a little better. Or, at least, her bad feelings seemed to dim some. That was good enough for Kazuki though. A small victory was still a victory.
“Certainly can,” he told her with a grin of his own that felt much more honest. If nothing else, it was nice to be able to help someone else. “Is Mei turning her prototype into the real thing?” he asked then, deciding on a topic that’d keep him engaged without further having to put up with the mess that was the elephant in the room.
“She’s working on it, yes,” Chikuchi answered, smoothly following the new conversation topic. “It worked great for the practical exam. I just had a few things to tell her, but there’s more changes necessary for my costume than the purse, honestly.”
“Mei’s no expert on how to turn formal clothes into something hero worthy. I’m not surprised. The one I have now was made by professionals after all,” he said with a chuckle. “She’ll get there. I’m glad that didn’t get in the way of you passing though.”
“Honestly, it made no difference, really. Thirteen was a pain to go against, but we didn’t get the chance to move much during the fight,” Chikuchi explained with a shrug, rubbing one arm with her hand and looking somewhat unsure. “Which was good. If I had to, it definitely would have been an issue.”
“Luck was on our side for once then,” he commented and was surprised to feel her bad emotions all but vanish as she beamed at him. That by itself was strange, since Chikuchi wasn’t always the most expressive person around. Least of all about good feelings. She was, after all, mostly infamous for her resting bitch face, after all.
No offense to her.
“Sure was,” she said, smiling from ear to ear. “Also, Mei told me that you gave her what was left of your budget to finish the last model for both my costume and equipment,” she added and his eye twitched. “Yeah. She’s not good with secrets.”
“So I’m learning,” he grumbled.
“I’ll pay you back eventually,” Chikuchi told him. When he went to say something though, she beat him to the punch. “I’ll have some money to share when I get promoted to 1-A, after all. Right? I can return the investment then.”
“... Sure thing then,” Kazuki said with an exasperated smile, knowing there’d be no end if he argued with her. He was happy to hear her be confident in her promotion for once, so he decided to let her get away with that.
[} Chapter End {]
Hey guys! How’s it going?
Well… sort of an aftermath chapter, kind of, maybe?
Our boy is kind of out of it and sorting out his feelings. Fun stuff, especially when his Quirk makes him more susceptible to bad emotions. He’s having a great time like that, I’m sure.
We also talked to a few characters and…
Look, don’t ask me about that random reporter PoV, alright? The Muse was doing Muse things and I don’t take responsibility for her actions. It was all her and that’s that.
Anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter.
I also hope that you had a good time at Christmas and I wish you a Happy New Year.
Important: I’m going on a vacation at the end of this week, as I announced some time ago. Thus, I won’t be updating anything for a whole month. Wish me luck, guys, because pre-vacation times have not been kind to me.
Discord Link: discord.gg/UTDransjJZ
Random Question: Any plans for the festivities? I’ll probably be home with my immediate family for Christmas and then I’ll be on a vacation trip with them and my aunt’s family for New Year’s.
See you.
