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Darkest Before Dawn - 93
🕑 Added 2025-01-30 17:53:20 +0000 UTCChapter 93
“All ready?” he asked, a smile on his face as he took his new violin and got ready. Itsuka nodded at him, camera in hand and positioned to record him. Then he glanced towards Hina before nodding back, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath in before slowly letting it out.
Then he opened his eyes and started playing.
His best song was the one that he chose to play then and there, after checking the violin and making sure that everything was in order. Hina deserved nothing but the best after the gift she gave him. Because Kazuki had no delusions that she’d bought a violin on the expensive side, which was already saying something considering the instruments weren’t cheap, really.
Even if it had been one of the cheap violins though, the gift meant the world to him. Because he’d been working towards buying one for himself and Hina knew it. She’d also told him to tell her if he did something out of the ordinary, something like “buying something”, before and it became clear to him at that moment what she’d been talking about. She’d been making sure that he didn’t get a violin himself before she gave him her gift.
At the end of the day though, Kazuki just felt really grateful and, thus, he’d do his absolute best playing this song. It was what Hina had asked for and he’d give her his best performance, or at least try to. If that was the only thing he could do to pay her back for the gift, for everything she did for him, then he’d play for her anytime.
Devil’s Trill wasn’t a very “grateful” song, of course, but he could work on one like that for next time. Kazuki made a mental note of that while getting ready. Not then and there though, because the only thing in his mind was playing and doing so well.
He wasn’t so good that he could play while distracted, at least not well. He had lost quite a number of years of practice, after all. Kazuki would catch up though, especially now that he had his own instrument. He could already tell that he’d have plenty of hours working on his music now that he could.
Eventually though, the song was over.
“Thank you,” he said, looking at Hina, who stood behind Itsuka and the camera, smiling as he regained his breath. “Thank you, Uwabami, for all the help and for this gift,” he added, taking in the moved expression on the woman. Maybe he’d done a good enough job with his music.
“No, thank you. That must be your best one yet,” Hina told him, approaching him as he went to set down the violin in its case. “It was beautiful. I feel like I should be paying you for the show.”
“I think the violin is much more than enough payment, Hina,” he commented jokingly, smile still in place. “You know how much I’ve wanted to get one?”
“A little bit. You’ve talked about it. It’s why I got it for you,” Hina replied, looking very proud of herself. “Seems like I chose well. Is the violin good? I’m no expert, but I checked with some other people and-”
“It’s perfect,” he interrupted, already having left the violin in its case and walking up to Hina. “Thank you,” he told her once more, drawing her into a hug.
“Don’t mention it,” she replied, her voice and her emotions seeming a little weird. Maybe she was feeling a little awkward because of how intense his reaction was? He couldn’t help it though. “It was the least I could do.”
He barked out a laugh at that, as if he could ever believe that. She was a lying liar, as far as he was concerned. She’d gone above and beyond what she was expected to do, after all. Not only had she been the best mentor, but she’d also given him opportunities that he wouldn’t have dreamed of, such as the interview that he was there to do. And now, she was giving him something that he’d been wanting for a while already, in a gesture that was more than anything his parents had ever done for him.
“You have no idea how wrong that statement is,” Kazuki told her with a chuckle. “Thank you,” he told her, squeezing her between his arms briefly before letting her go. He guessed he’d made her feel awkward enough as it was. He still grinned at the woman though, because he seemed incapable of having any other expression for a while by then.
“Will it make you feel better if I accept your thanks?” she asked him exasperatedly. When he nodded, she sighed, but there was a very visible smile on her face too. “Fine then. You’re welcome… Now!” she continued, clapping as if to close that conversation. She was still feeling a little odd, which made Kazuki think that’s why she wanted to move on. “I think we’ve ignored Itsuka long enough.”
“Don’t mind me,” the girl herself told them, waving both of them off. “That was a beautiful moment, actually. I took a picture,” she added with a grin and Kazuki rolled his eyes… even if his smile remained.
“I told you to record me playing, nothing else,” he said, narrowing his eyes a bit as he walked up to the girl and took the camera away from her. He did check the pictures she’d taken though and they were… nice. So, looking for the best one, he saved it and deleted the rest. No need to have a million pictures when one could be enough for every moment.
He wouldn’t be telling her that he saved one though.
“So, what did you have in mind for right now?” he asked, turning towards Hina.
“Now, we work on both of your gigs. Plenty of practice and rehearsing to do,” their mentor announced.
[}-o-{]
Running a weary hand through his hair, Kazuki dropped on the sofa in the common room of sorts in Hina’s agency. Off to the side, the heroine herself was advising Itsuka on her own thing. There’d been some other employees from the agency helping both of them out too for a bit there, but they’d been sent away some time before. Now it was just the three of them once more and he was taking a bit of a break while the other two talked about their stuff.
Thus, Kazuki tried to make the most of his brief moment to himself.
He deflated on the couch, relaxing, closing his eyes and taking deep breaths. The emotions coming from his Quirk were still there, but it was nothing he wasn’t used to, so he pushed them aside with some ease. Traveling had taken quite a bit out of him. The same went for the mentoring session they’d just held – which might even stretch for some more time – and it’d also been an emotional day in the end.
Kazuki was kind of surprised that he still had energy left, quite honestly.
Alas, there was no rest for the wicked, further proven when his phone vibrated in his pocket, again. He groaned, but ultimately shifted to take it out and check. He’d been ignoring it for a bit already and it probably wasn’t a good idea to put it off for much longer. After all, he had an inkling that he knew who it was and that he’d want to see what was up. Sure enough, he was getting messages in the group chat he’d set up between himself and the Management students.
For the most part, the three of them were talking among themselves, just bouncing things off one another. Kazuki skimmed through their messages a little bit, trying to get the gist of the conversation and the parts that he most might be concerned about. All in all though, they seemed to agree that the idea he’d shared with them was a good one. Granted, it was rushing some plans, but there wasn’t any real reason why not to go for it.
What was it?
Posting his video playing the violin as his first step into social media.
It was a big, scary step, for sure, but Kazuki would have to do this at some point regardless. Might as well get it over with and… Well, he had other reasons to want to go for it too. The Management students seemed to agree with him that there was nothing wrong with the idea though, so that was reassuring. At that point, they were mostly trying to figure out what would be best put in the post’s text space, among other things.
Kazuki almost wanted to suggest just posting the video on its own, but they’d commented on how it wasn’t a great idea already. Thus, he tried to help them figure out something that’d sound like something he’d actually say while also being good enough for his first post ever and posting in general. More complicated than one might think, especially considering all the little details that he had to take into account in order to avoid giving a bad impression as much as possible.
There’d always be people that saw the worst in what he did, either because they couldn’t let go of who he was or because there would always be people to hate on something, no matter what it was. That’s why he had the Management team though, to take care of the ugliest side for him. He’d leave that in their capable hands unless he felt like it was too much for them. In which case he might need to call on Hina for help.
Still though, that didn’t mean he couldn’t try and make that a little easier for everyone involved.
“What’s got you so absorbed?” the aforementioned heroine asked him, making Kazuki jump where he sat. “I called for you a few times.”
“Sorry,” he mumbled with a nervous smile. “I thought the video of me playing could be my first post,” he said, drawing shyly into himself. It felt odd to comment on that to Hina. Was it weird that he was making a big deal of it like he was? Was he worrying too much? Hina herself had worried about it, even though it was her idea, so surely he was justified, right?
“Are you sure you want to dive into it so quickly?” she asked as she moved to sit beside him and peeked at his phone screen. “And that that’s what you want to start with?”
“No reason not to do so right now,” he commented with a shrug. “And I think it’s good enough. I like that video and I think it’s impactful enough without feeling like I’m forcing a grand entrance or making the entrance too much,” he explained, wondering if he was making a wrong choice. At least he had the reassurance of Hina being right there to tell him if he was being stupid.
“It’s a good idea, but I thought you might want to do something more personal for your first post, not something about me,” Hina told him softly. There was some uncertainty coming from her, mixed with some kind of uncomfortable – or maybe pained? – feeling that felt odd to him. He was feeling entirely too many odd emotions he couldn’t quite place those days…
“Without you, I wouldn’t even be doing half the things I am,” he said, a smile on his face. “And the Management students told me that I should post things I’d want to show or tell to everyone in the world. This certainly fits the bill. I think everyone should know how much I appreciate everything you’ve done for me, Hina.” There, he’d said it. “This is personal.”
Now he’d just resolutely not look at the heroine for a while to get over his embarrassment, thank you very much.
“... Ok… I guess it… works,” she said, struggling with the words and with the odd feeling getting worse. Maybe he had messed up somehow? Should he apologize? Should he try to go for something else? “Now, let’s see about this post, yeah? I’ll help you out and give some advice to these kids too,” Hina added, her voice going back to normal and her emotions normalizing.
Maybe he’d misunderstood something?
[}-o-{]
“So, do you feel ready?” Hina asked them while they sat at the small dining area at her agency. She had a place for literally anything there, since there were always people around on duty. There were kitchens and sleeping areas – that Kazuki and Itsuka didn’t use, even during the internships, since they’d been given a place to stay at back then – together with a number of other rooms to make sure that nothing was needed. There was also the fact that Hina half-lived there, having shifts that lasted days and that she’d sometimes string together into as much as a whole week.
That didn’t happen often, but it could, at times when her side job didn’t give her much to do.
“No?” Itsuka answered, feeling fairly nervous.
“Ready as I’ll ever be,” was Kazuki’s response, more resigned than confident.
“You guys really need to be more sure of yourselves,” Hina told them with a huff. “You’ve prepared enough. You got this.”
“If you say so.”
“Of course.”
Hina stared at them with an expression as flat as their replies had been. Apparently, she wasn’t impressed with their level of confidence for their respective jobs, or interview for a job, in his case. Too bad that she was dealing with teenagers, he supposed. Self-esteem issues were basically their thing, from what he knew.
“One day, I’ll fix you two, I swear.”
““Good luck,”” both of them said almost at the same time, sharing a self-deprecating grin between themselves. “You might need to give up, Hina,” he added after a moment, turning his smile towards the heroine.
“Never,” the woman replied stubbornly. “Now, keep eating, you two. You’ll need all the energy you can have. Can’t have my interns do badly, now can I?”
“No pressure,” Itsuka said dryly.
“Yes, mom,” was Kazuki’s response in turn, turning back to his meal. He grimaced a second later when he felt Hina’s emotions get all odd once more. Yeah, he probably shouldn’t be making jokes like that, given his mother and such. Maybe he was more affected by the whole exam – even though he was feeling better as the days passed – and the whole thing with the interview and his looming social media debut.
Speaking of, it had been decided that he’d go through with it once things were set up. He couldn’t just make an account and post, after all. He needed to enter a little more smoothly. Get his account set up, get his friends and other closer acquaintances to add him and then get the ball rolling with them once his first post was on. The Management team was taking care of getting all that done. The main part was getting the requests accepted and then organizing with his closer friends so that they’d share the post… all done in a way that didn’t feel artificial.
It was a bit of a headache, but that’s precisely why he’d recruited them, so Kazuki left it all in their capable hands.
“There,” he said, eventually daring to look up after he finished his meal and was more certain that the awkwardness of his comment had gone away. Looking up, he pushed his plate away slightly. “Happy?” he asked Hina, somewhat teasing.
“Good,” she replied with a nod, but her emotions still seemed odd, if less so. “Drink more water though.”
“Fine,” Kazuki said with a roll of his eyes and a smile. Hina could sound like Recovery Girl at times, which was a little amusing. He wouldn’t be telling her that though. He had some self-preservation instincts, after all. “So, what now?”
“Now, we can relax some more. No need to be all about work,” Hina told them and both Itsuka and him blinked at her. “What? You thought it’d all be training, rehearsing and working? I need breaks too, you know?”
“That’s kind of how the internship went though,” Itsuka pointed out, taking the words right out of Kazuki’s mouth.
“Yeah, but this isn’t an internship. This is me helping you out,” Hina replied, waving them off with her hand. “Now, is there anything you guys want to do?”
“I mean, I guess I could practice with viol-”
“No,” Hina denied immediately, before he even finished.
“I could try out the training se-”
“No.”
“We could study so-”
“No,” Hina repeated once more, growing a little annoyed. “You kids are entirely too serious. Relax, will you? I know you like to play, Kazuki, and I know you like to train, Itsuka, but you need to do things that don’t require effort from time to time,” she explained to them… to which Itsuka and Kazuki shared an unsure look. “Honestly,” Hina huffed, rolling her eyes.
“I don’t know what’s here to do, really,” Kazuki said, rubbing the back of his neck. There was also the fact that he didn’t really know what to do with his free time when he wasn’t participating in one of his hobbies or training or studying. Most of the time, he just went along with whatever his friends wanted to do. Hina’s presence also made things slightly awkward, since he didn’t usually hang out with adults except when his minders visited his apartment, like before with Aizawa and now with Nemuri.
“Maybe there’s a park nearby we can visit?” Itsuka asked and he perked up. That sounded nice. Especially if-
“One with gardens or at least plants to look at?” he added, turning back towards Hina to see that she was pleased they’d finally decided on something she could agree to. He wasn’t sure what else they could do in a park, but maybe the other two would help him figure it out.
“I know just the place, I think,” the woman said and he smiled.
[}-o-{]
“Stop picking at your clothes,” Hina told him and Kazuki grimaced.
He just felt like the casual clothes he was wearing weren’t up to par with the task at hand. He was auditioning for a movie. Surely he’d need to dress well, right? Not that he was in rags or anything, but when he’d pictured it, he’d imagined himself wearing a suit or something more formal, more befitting of something so… grand.
“You need something comfortable, first and foremost, so that your movement isn’t impaired. Besides, the scenes they gave you to audition with don’t require formal clothing, at all,” Hina reassured him, almost like she’d read his mind. “Unless they make you cold read, but then you won’t be expected to be dressing the part, obviously.”
“Ok, it’s just…” he started, before trailing off. It was just that he wanted to do his best and he was nervous. Hina had done everything she could to help him though and he had to trust her. Everything else from now on was on him and his skills.
It was better to imagine that something else was a factor though, he supposed.
“You’ll be fine, Kazuki,” she told him, stopping her walk to put a hand on his shoulder and give him a comforting squeeze. “You’ve got this,” she added with a confident smile that he returned with a nervous one. He might not believe what she believed, but the fact that she believed it was reassuring, if only a little.
So, he nodded and they continued walking. They moved inside a building, where someone greeted them and then guided them to a room. That is, until they reached a particular room.
“I’m afraid that only the auditionee can enter, ma’am,” the woman that had been their guide said and Uwabami nodded. They’d talked about it and Kazuki already expected to be left alone at some point. This was it.
“Of course,” her mentor said and she gave him an encouraging nod before he was shown inside.
Kazuki took a deep breath in as he walked through the door and into a mostly empty room. That is, beside the long table to the side with a few people sitting there. These were the people that he needed to impress and convince. There were also a few other people with filming equipment, so that they could judge how he looked on camera instead of just how he looked normally.
“Good afternoon, everyone. Thank you for the opportunity,” he said with a slight bow, his best mask on since way before he even walked into the building. It was only when he walked in that he pulled on his best mix of negative emotions. Or, at least, the best he’d found so far. That was a lot more taxing, after all.
He got a bunch of replies to his greeting and he gave his best business smile to them as they did so. Names were dropped and Kazuki tried to commit them all to memory. He would forget many of them anyway, but he tried to make sure he remembered the judges’, at the very least.
Then, who appeared to be in charge of things spoke.
“Welcome, Mr. Endo,” the man said and if his Quirk wasn’t eye related, Kazuki would be surprised. The irises and pupils were bigger than normal even though the eyes themselves didn’t look any different from the norm. The distinctive amber color also made them look that much sharper. Kazuki had the impression that anything he did would be spotted, the good and the bad.
It was, somehow, both reassuring and unnerving.
“If you could give us a moment, we have to set things up for your audition,” the man said calmly and Kazuki just nodded.
“Of course, sir,” he replied as politely as possible. ‘Be polite, be calm and be patient,’ he recited in his mind, one of Hina’s many pieces of advice. So, with his “orders” received, he stood there, in front of the judges while the people with the equipment moved around him and did their thing. Many of the things they did looked familiar, from the time he’d been on the backstage of Hina’s ad recording.
As they set it up, he paid special attention to the lighting equipment and crew, together with the cameras. That’s what he had more of an idea about, after all, so he tried to put what he’d learned to good use there. He took note of that to have a better idea of what to do when the time came, how to position himself and such.
“I think we can begin now,” the man in charge said and Kazuki nodded, running his fingers through his hair. He’d gotten good enough that the move looked good and his hair wasn’t messed up by it, which was more important. “Are you?”
“Of course,” he said as confidently as possible. No one needed to know about the knot his insides were turning into other than himself. “Where should I start and with what?”
“Let’s start with the first scene of the ones we sent you, is that alright?” a woman to the side of the head judge asked, her voice cold and harsh. Kazuki didn’t let it get to him, keeping his smile in place. He’d faced much more frightening people, in juvie, in the USJ, in interviews. If they were trying to intimidate him, they’d fail, and if she was just like that, then he was fine anyway. Her emotions didn’t mirror her voice though, so he imagined it was a test of some kind.
“I have a different idea,” another man on the judge table cut off before he could give a response to the woman. Several of the judges turned to him and he saw – and felt – some annoyance appearing, but for the most part people didn’t seem too bothered.
Which made sense, Kazuki supposed. That was the movie director, after all. That didn’t mean he was the most important one on the table though. His word wouldn’t get him in if he liked Kazuki. However, his word would keep him out if he didn’t like him.
‘No pressure,’ Kazuki thought to himself.
“Let’s start with something a little harder, shall we?” the man suggested and Kazuki didn’t let that question affect him. He was already as nervous and scared as he was going to be, really. It couldn’t get worse. “How about Scene 7?”
Kazuki didn’t need to check what scene that was. It was one of the scenes that Hina said would be the most important for his passing, if they asked for it. It was a difficult scene, despite how little dialogue it involved and one that couldn’t be messed up.
And the judges asking for it made his smile turn that much more honestly.
“Is that fine with you, Mr. Endo?” the head judge asked, turning towards him and raising an eyebrow.
“Of course,” he replied easily and he seemed to catch everyone’s attention. Well, off to a good start, he supposed. The fact that the man that had suggested the scene smiled made him wonder if it had been someone giving him a hand. He could appreciate that
“Then, please, let’s see it,” the head judge indicated, almost warmly. “Director, if you would?” he added then, turning to the man in question, who nodded.
“Of course,” the director answered. “Now, I want you to act the scene towards me first. We’ll do another try towards a camera later,” the man informed him and Kazuki nodded. “I’ll call for when to start, alright?”
“Sure,” Kazuki answered simply. Not wanting to bother with anything else, Kazuki cleared his expression, took a deep breath in and let it out. As he did that, he reached with his Quirk. There was a reason why he was confident in it and that’s because it was an intense scene that relied a lot on negative emotions. That was one kind of scene that he was confident in.
So, he pulled on the emotion nodes that he needed and waited.
“And, go,” the director said and Kazuki moved immediately.
He walked towards the man, emotions boiling inside him. Anger, frustration and revulsion, all of them coursed through him as he let his expression mirror them towards the outside. He stalked forward, decisively, resolutely. He reached the table, leaning on it and down so his face was closer to the man.
And then, he spoke.
“You,” he half hissed and half growled, pausing and taking a deep breath in to “calm himself”. His glare remained though, staring at the man like he was the reason for all his negativity… which he kind of was, depending on how one looked at it. “You disgust me,” he said, dropping the line like it was a foul thing in his mouth, a statement of fact and nothing else cold as ice and hard like steel. “Do you have any idea…?” he started asking.
However, he didn’t finish the question, instead grimacing as if he were holding himself back. His expression pinched, he balled his hands into fists before extending his fingers back outwards, as if trying to relax. All the way, he kept glaring at the man before him like he was really the case of all his emotions… Which he kind of was, in a way, so maybe that helped.
“Just… Stay away from us, from him,” he told the director, letting air out of his nose as if that’d help him calm down.
Then he took another deep breath in, straightening himself and looking down at the director. His expression twitched as if he were going to say something else but thought better of it. Then Kazuki turned to the side, his expression softening as he let go of the emotions a little bit. After that, he side-eyed the director with the emotions coming back a bit and then he just turned away sharply once more, this time walking away and not turning back.
“And that’s that,” he heard after a few steps, making him turn towards the director, who had spoken. He saw the man staring, his face lit up with excitement and no bad emotions to be found anywhere on the judge table.
Kazuki beamed right back, now a lot more confident about his chances.
[} Chapter End {]
Hey guys! How’s it going?
The Muse is intent on testing my limits with this fic, evidently, because it seems to push me to try things that I’d never touch with a ten-foot pole.
Really, why?
But oh well, at least I’m confident in most of the chapter. It’s just the end part that has me a little nervous. It’s hard enough to make realistic characters in a story, now I have to make realistic characters attempting to act a realistic story… An inception of realistic story telling, I guess? Storyception, if you will.
I hate myself.
Anyway, hope you guys liked the chapter and that I’m worrying about nothing once more.
Discord Link: discord.gg/UTDransjJZ
Random Question: What’s the last show or movie you saw? I was watching The Glades yesterday. I dropped it, but still.
See you.
