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Akuyaku Reijou ni Nanka Narimasen - Chapter 548, 549, 550
🕑 Added 2024-11-24 09:00:09 +0000 UTCRosarin and chefs.
Weddings and delicious food go hand in hand. Should we go with a course meal or a buffet-style party?
To decide, I turned to Dan, our family’s head chef and a long-time companion. My brother? Oh, he’s out with Mitchell-san and the others.
“Ojousama.”
“Yes?”
“The food served at a wedding is a reflection of the chef’s skills. I want to create the ultimate full-course meal for your big day!”
“Dan…!”
What incredible enthusiasm! I couldn’t help but feel motivated myself.
“Ojousama! I want to craft the world’s first and finest full-course meal centered around rice! If it’s with you, I know we can do it! This is my chance to make your wedding meal the crowning achievement of my career!”
“Dan!! Alright, let’s do it!”
Who knew he’d even been thinking about rice! Moved by his passion, I got on board.
When we put out the call for sous chefs and additional staff for the big day…
“Dan, what’s with this lineup?!”
“Oh, their skills are top-notch.”
“Why are most of them top-tier palace chefs?! Sure, they’re talented, but come on!”
“They’re old colleagues of mine. They don’t care much about pay; they just want a chance to sample the food we’ll be making together.”
I see. They’re intrigued by the idea of tasting dishes made by me, the cheat-wielding otherworldly cooking enthusiast, alongside a master like Dan. Understandable.
“Alright then, let’s get their input for the menu.”
With this level of talent, designing a menu should be easy.
After much discussion, we decided on a full-course meal. Buffets tend to run the risk of certain dishes running out too quickly, and with a crowd this size, it wasn’t a safe option.
Their idea of a full course wasn’t all that different from what I knew from my world. The only real differences were the lack of a palate-cleansing sorbet and coffee after the meal, as tea remains the main beverage here. Mentioning this sparked Dan’s curiosity about food from my world.
Naturally, the palace chefs wanted in on the action too. Who wouldn’t want to taste authentic, otherworldly cuisine?
“Give me some time to think about it. Also, for safety reasons, I can only bring one other person.”
Of course, I’d have to get permission from the gods first.
“Sure, go ahead!”
The ever-casual god, as always, was light and breezy about it.
“Hmm… I have no objection.”
Even Heavenly Fox, a.k.a. Tenko-sama, approved easily. In fact, he decided to tag along, saying it had been a while since he’d had a truly good meal.
Surrounded by dashing older gentlemen with sharp features, my morally ambiguous face stood out like a sore thumb. When his son, Ten-chan, added his two cents…
“You look like a boss lady, Rosarin-san… or should I say, Big sis?”
“I’m not leading anyone!”
To blend in as a foreigner, I changed my black hair and eyes to brown hair and blue eyes. My original features didn’t match my "Western" face at all.
By Tenko-sama’s suggestion, we dined at a three-star restaurant. Every dish was beautiful and delicious, and Dan, along with the head chef from the palace (who had somehow joined the party), discussed and sampled each dish thoroughly.
At one point, Dan suddenly said:
“Could we call out the chef?”
“Dan?”
“It’s fine, Ojousama.”
Though unsure what he was up to, I followed his lead.
“What seems to be the matter?”
The chef was a kind-looking older man.
“I’ve been too arrogant. Ojousama’s ingredients are exquisite, and I relied on their inherent quality to shine. But this… This is something else. These dishes extract the maximum potential from ordinary ingredients, crafting masterpieces individually and as a cohesive whole. I’ve never encountered such extraordinary cuisine before.”
“Thank you. That’s high praise.”
The chef smiled warmly, though Dan looked deeply conflicted.
“Please take me as your apprentice!!”
......... What?
“......... What?”
The kind-looking chef was just as stunned as I was. We must have been thinking the same thing.
“I’ll do anything, even handle menial tasks! Please let me learn under you!”
“Ehhh…?”
The poor chef looked utterly bewildered. I don’t blame him—I was just as flustered.
“I get how you feel… Dan, leave things to me!”
“Stop egging him on!”
Even as I scolded the palace head chef for his reckless encouragement, Dan wouldn’t back down.
“Hmm, Rin.”
“Huh? Yes?”
Tenko-sama spoke up unexpectedly, tilting his head slightly.
“If you desire it, I can arrange for him to train here.”
“No, that’s too much…”
“Consider it a wedding gift. Or an apology for the trouble my foolish son caused in the past. What do you say?”
Dan had done so much for me, and if this was his dream, I wanted to make it happen.
“Please, make it so.”
“Heh… You truly are selfless when it comes to others.”
With a wave of his hand, Tenko-sama convinced the chef to accept Dan. Smiling, he said he’d take responsibility and bring Dan back when he was ready.
“Thank you, Tenko-sama.”
A week later…
“Sorry to keep you waiting, Ojousama! Japanese, French, Chinese, Indian… you name it, I can cook it all now!”
Dan returned looking like a man 20 years younger. And not just with French cuisine under his belt?
“... Tenko-sama?”
"I couldn’t help it, I made him younger little by little so it wouldn’t be too obvious... sorry!"
Tenko-sama is definitely Tenko-sama’s father. He’s indulgent and kind to those he’s taken in.
"I understand. I’ll tell Obaasama."
"Rin!!? Please don’t! Her lectures last forever!"
"I know."
Grandma’s lectures are endless and she loves to bring up old stories. She’s not a bad person at her core, but she has a lot of quirks, and Rinka really disliked her. Her relationship with Koto Neechan was also the worst. As for Koto Neechan, it's probably because they're stepdaughter and stepmother.
"Rin!??"
It’s because you kept making him younger! But there’s no ill intent, so I’ll let it slide this time.
Just kidding.
If things could be solved by saying sorry, there would be no need for the police! I made sure Grandma heard about it through Minato-san and he received a thorough lecture.
Then, I got a message back from Grandma: "Come visit me once to show your face." When I have business in Japan next time, I think I’ll take Rinka with me to say hello.
----------
The ultimate menu.
The person seemed to have more they wanted to learn, but Dan returned after completing his training.
Dan’s cooking had leveled up significantly, with his plating—once tasty but slightly messy—now elevated to the level of an art form. The skill of a dedicated chef is incredible. Or maybe the knowledge from another world plays a part too? Probably both.
“The flavors of the ingredients are stronger here...”
Dan mentioned that while training, he had been contemplating the full-course menu for the wedding. He served us some of his trial dishes, and even without special ingredients, everything was absolutely exquisite!
“It’s delicious~”
“Hearing you say that is the greatest reward, Ojousama.”
Dan smiled warmly and patted my head. To him, I must seem like a little granddaughter. While treating me as an equal, he also spoils me with affection.
“I even trained to make that ramen and curry you wanted, Ojousama.”
WHAT DID YOU SAY!?
“Though it’s not suitable for the wedding menu, I really want to eat ramen! What kind of ramen?”
“I’ve prepared salt seafood, tonkotsu, and soy sauce varieties, so you can have some for lunch.”
“Dan, you’re the best!!”
And so, I urgently called upon my close friends.
“This is an emergency! Ramen scramble!”
“What does that even mean!?”
Thank you, Kanata-san, for your sharp retort! But I’m on a ramen high right now, so it can’t be helped! I’ve always wanted to try making ramen, but it’s so labor-intensive, and I’ve never made noodles from scratch before.
Soon, Rin, Yukihime, and Kanata-san arrived. Unfortunately, Makoto couldn’t join due to work. He was genuinely upset, so I promised to bring him some next time. I get it! Who wouldn’t want to eat ramen!?
“Ahhh... This is amazing! Simply the best!!”
“Slurp, slurp, slurp... So good.”
“Wow, Rosarin-chan’s Dan-san is incredible. This is restaurant-grade! If he opened a shop, I’d be a regular. It’s insanely good!”
We all indulged in the delicious ramen. I made some gyoza to pair with it. Ahh… pure bliss. We even managed to freeze-dry the leftover soup and noodles! The development of packaged ramen for the otherworld's adventurer guild became a top-selling product, but that’s a story for another time. Sadly, the issue with containers means cup noodles are still out of reach.
Now, after the thrilling ramen high, the focus shifted back to the main topic.
“This is the wedding menu I’ve envisioned.”
Dan’s menu was a full-course meal, leaning more towards kaiseki-style. However, every dish was cleverly adapted to be eaten with forks and knives.
For rice, there were options of ochazuke, porridge, or seasoned rice, along with plain white rice.
The chefs were tasting each dish with solemn expressions, but the consensus was always the same—delicious.
“So, what do you think?”
“It’s perfect!”
“No, not yet. These are made with ‘ordinary’ ingredients. To create the ultimate full-course meal, I need these specific materials. Depending on the ingredients, some flavors may need adjustments.”
Dan handed me a list of ingredients. As I reviewed it, the head chef of the Cristia Royal Palace, peering over my shoulder, turned pale.
“Wait, this is impossible! Even a nation’s budget wouldn’t cover this!”
“No worries... Leave it to me! Having accidentally made it onto the SSS-rank monster guild’s blacklist and earned the nickname ‘Gluttonous Rosarin,’ there’s no prey I can’t hunt!”
“... Wait, hunt? Don’t you mean buy?”
The head chef—and everyone but Dan—looked utterly horrified.
“Ojousama often casually brings back S-rank ingredients as souvenirs for me, so I’m sure she’ll be fine. But be careful, alright?”
“Haha, of course. And while I’m at it, I’ll aim for even higher-ranked materials for some of these.”
“... Seriously?”
“These and these are already in stock. I’ve been storing a variety of premium ingredients just in case.”
“... Seriously?”
Dan and the head chef went to inspect the storeroom in my hideout.
“Jouchan, that room is insane. It’s like a treasure trove of culinary gold!”
I got scolded, though I don’t quite understand why. I mean, I hunted all that with Geraldin-san because we might need it! Even Valkyrie said she was losing her sense of purpose, so we went on a massive hunting spree for the first time in ages. Maybe I went a little overboard in my excitement...
“Ojousama… Did you gather all of this just for me?”
Dan was in tears. What happened!? Did something go wrong!?
“Yes. I wasn’t sure what you’d use, so I went all out to collect as many top-quality ingredients as possible. Was something not to your liking?”
“To be this prepared… If I don’t live up to this, I’m no man! Ojousama, I will create the ultimate full-course meal! This will be my gift to you!”
“Dan…! Thank you! If you need more plant-based ingredients, I can grow endless supplies. And as for meat, fish, or shellfish, I’ll keep hunting whatever you need!”
“... You and Dan are unbelievable… What kind of masterpiece is going to come out of this?”
The head chef gazed off into the distance for a while. Meanwhile, countless aspiring chefs flooded Dan with requests to become his apprentice, but he declined, choosing to devote himself entirely to crafting the ultimate full-course meal.
Thus began the legend of Dan, the Miracle Chef.
----------
A very rational hunt.
I reviewed the list Dan wrote:
- Meat of the Billion Buffalo
- Eggs of the Ukokkatrice
- Meat of the Beast King Cattle-Bird
- Sea King Tuna
- Rainbow Shrimp
… and so on.
When it comes to hunting, Geraldin-san is the go-to person. He eagerly joined in, wagging his tail. Jash, who was off duty, decided to tag along as well. Even Jend came to help, saying he wanted to do something for me. I tried to pay them for their assistance, but they refused, expressing a desire to repay the favor.
I spread out the world map and pondered. The habitats are scattered all over. Is there some place where I can find all these boss-level monsters together? … No, the sea creatures are probably impossible...
If I approach this normally, it might take years. Boss-level creatures aren’t just lying around waiting to be found...
“Oh!”
I found it. There’s a place where all the targets can be hunted!
Which brings us here: the extra dungeon beneath the Wolfanea Castle!
“Well, I’ll cooperate, but…”
The Dungeon Master, lounging lazily on Kagiko-san’s lap, sounded reluctant, but he agreed to help.
“Your attitude toward the Awaited One is unacceptable.”
“Yipe!”
To my shock, Kagiko-san grabbed the Dungeon Master (in his puppy form) by the tail and swung him around dynamically!
“Kagiko-san! Don’t grab a dog’s tail! You should pet it gently! You’ll tear it off!”
“He’s not a dog. He’s a silver wolf.”
“No, he’s the Dungeon Master, you know!”
“W-Well, just let him go! Poor thing!”
And so went the comically disjointed exchange with Geraldin-san, the stoic Jend, and the kind Josh.
“Happy to cooperate!!”
Crying and screaming, the Dungeon Master finally agreed and was released.
Then, we were transported directly to the boss room, and the hunt began.
A Billion Buffalo appeared!
Geraldin-san defeated it!
Ukokkatrice eggs appeared!
Josh quietly stored them!
A Beast King Cattle-Bird appeared!
Jend defeated it!
The Sea King Tuna flopped around!
Jash skillfully prepared it!
A swarm of Rainbow Shrimp appeared!
The silver wolf duo defeated them!
Everything was so rushed!!
It was easy, yes, but still! The only effort involved was waiting for the prey to be summoned and then taking them down. Some, like the eggs, just needed to be collected!
“Something feels… lacking.”
“Yeah...”
The silver wolves were too fast, leaving no work for the Valkyrie.
“You’re so spoiled… How about this?”
A buffalo-like creature I’d never seen before appeared. It was massive, dragon-sized, with three heads, horns, and an imposing aura of strength.
“Whoa! That’s…”
It dodged Geraldin-san’s attack, repelled Jend’s strike with a barrier, and retaliated with a breath attack.
“That was close!!”
Thankfully, I set up a barrier in time, or it could’ve been fatal.
“Hahaha! What a worthy foe! My Lord! That must be an Abyssal Buffalo!”
“That sounds amazing!”
It was a monster I’d never even seen in games! Wait, is that a snake for a tail? Jash is getting wrapped up in it!!
“Valkyrie!”
“Rosaariiin!!”
CHOMP!
Valkyrie, why did you shove your head into the snake’s mouth?! Well, it’s an opening!
“Wind, heed my call!”
No fire or ice—those would ruin the meat. I needed to bleed it out instead!
“Wha—?!”
“Ahhh!!”
“Nooo!”
“Kyaaaa!!”
The spell reflected off its fur, scattering everywhere and nearly hitting us all!
“It seems its fur has magic reflection properties.”
“I see.”
If that’s the case, there’s another way!
“Valkyrie, activate ‘Bari-Kannon Mode!’”
“Rosaariiiin!!”
A ridiculous pun, but effective. Valkyrie wielded clippers like a multi-armed deity, mercilessly shaving the buffalo’s fur with incredible speed.
“It looks so pitiful without fur...”
To make it worse, Valkyrie left it with a Mohawk style for fun.
“Bumo!? BUMOOOO!!”
It let out a frustrated bellow and charged at me. I couldn’t dodge! Could my barrier withstand it!?
“My Lord! I will protect you!!”
“BUMOOO!?”
Geraldin-san threw herself between us and hurled the dragon-sized buffalo away with brute strength. Impressive.
As if on cue, Jend slashed its belly open, and Josh finished it off with precise strikes to its three heads—and the snake-tail, too.
The teamwork was remarkable, and for the first time, Josh truly shone. He seemed elated when I patted his head in appreciation. Of course, I also praised Geraldin-san and Jend, though Geraldin-san practically shoved his son aside to get his share of head pats.
“Hey, Awaited One,” the Dungeon Master interjected.
“What is it?”
“Wouldn’t even higher-ranked monsters be better than what’s on that list? Should I summon some?”
I grinned mischievously. Geraldin-san looked equally excited, while Jend and Josh exchanged resigned glances. They said they’d see this through, so they had no choice.
In the end, we did it.
The meat was so delicious, even lightly salted, that it made us beam with joy and nearly cry tears of ecstasy. What’s more, it surpassed all expectations, delivering flavors so incredible that they felt otherworldly.
Next: https://www.patreon.com/posts/116942132
