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"Are you kidding?"
🕑 Added 2020-10-22 01:26:55 +0000 UTCI interrupted the monkey's whining tirade. "I don't think you realize where you are nor who you're dealing with."
Lysander paused and looked around, while the trees rustled menacingly (which was a nice touch.)
"AY YI YI!" Lysander wailed, suddenly doubling over and clutching his knee. "My knee! You brutes have damaged my knee! You're going to have to pay the cost of my surgery, as well as some hush money if you don't want me to alert the Guards to your activities here!"
"Forget it, you faker," I scoffed dismissively. "Nobody touched your knees, and you were only pretending to be unconscious earlier. I saw how you suddenly sprang up when I mentioned the Crotch Punch of Life. You're just trying to pull a fast one, to extort money from me. I know how you lowfolk operate. You're worse than Vulpitanians."
"LOWFOLK??" Lysander exclaimed indignantly. "That, sir, is blatant Antipathy Speech! Why, I'll have the, uh, the Non-Elvish Anti-Antipathy Guild come down on you so fast your head will spin! You'll never do business in these woods again! Unless of course you're willing to make amends immediately. You'll find that I am a reasonable monkey. I'm willing to forgive and forget, if the price is right."
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Comments
leafgreen
While a drastic response to this fool may be tempting. I suggest seeking Vernier's advice on what should be done about him. She has shown to be pretty sensible and is far more used to dealing with low folk being one herself. This is a decent opportunity to show your trust in her and making her feel useful, (in a way that is not only emotional support).
Walter Reimer
TOUCH the Monkey! Now ist der time on Schprockets ven ve DANCE! (sound of bad German techno dance music)
Simone Spinozzi
Dude wants to be paid. That much is obvious. I would ask what is the right price to do stuff that would be useful. At this point anything goes. <h1>😅👍</h1>
Major Matt Mason
Do a Peter Gabriel and shock the monkey.
"All the time..."
No, alas, he isn't.
Joel Kreissman
Transform him into a toad.
Rick2tails
that monkey is a scammer it seems. but it takes one to know one. and again with the blatent classism! He is not a very woke skunk at all!
