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Chapter 51 - Meeting old friends (1/2)

🕑 Added 2020-11-04 12:36:32 +0000 UTC

Comments

Zogarth

Yep, fixed!

Azulmar

'At least three of them still lived, at least' I think you could cut one of the "at least"

Zogarth

Fixed. I did edit the second one a bit, but it is actually a complete sentence. "The crafters got involved." is a sentence in itself.

BubblyGhost

"Jacob was walking about(,) talking with people" Comma after about, or some other sentence break "Especially the crafters got involved." Incomplete sentence

Wow lol let’s see what happens 😁

Zogarth

The second part is also up, but only for the 5+ bucks tier until tomorrow (begun building that up too after I got the 5 advance chapters for 3 dollar tier done).

Derrick McDowell

Does 1/2 mean we will be getting another one today? Edit, NVM I see it but can't access it it join the patron tier for it?

John Doe

so here's what I'm hoping would happen. Caroline thinks best decision is to betray Jake, even though she knows it's wrong. It's the safest option for her and Jacob. The fight starts. Jake is strong, but can't fight everyone before the rest of the camp comes. Jacob switches over to Jake's camp and escapes with him. Caroline stays with camp, maybe due to getting an injury that prevents her frome escaping. Richard and Caroline gets together as a couple, he manipulates her because she has to be there for the rest of the camp, says they'll find jacob, and that it's safer inside the camp instead of being alone. She's already helped Richard manipulate William kill many people in order to keep the camp strong. It would be too weird for her to switch over to Jake's side for no reason. Hayden still hates them when they try to talk to them. Outcome: Jake and Jacob leave tutorial and head out to find a camp to join. Jacob may leave to join camp while Jake goes solo. Richard and Caroline becomes a source of conflict after the tutorial. Jake and Jacob tries to find a way to save everyone. We need a continual source of conflict. Hayden stays a source of conflict, but he's thinking that maybe he's being manipulated This way, we have clear enemies and no convenient "everythihg solved" plot. It also highlights the vipers response of Jake needing to get stronger until he's strong enough to wipe out all plots/deceptions against him. It will also goad Jake into getting as strong as possible.

Zogarth

Fixed!

“Jacob was waiting patiently as she saw Caroline” —> he saw

Danielle Warvel

TRUST NO ONE JAKE! *twitchy eye* NNOOooooonnnneeeee!

Ethan Flohr

Thank you~


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