Leaqio.com
Zogarth from patreon
Zogarth patreon

Chapter 204 - The Wyvern of the Desolates

🕑 Added 2021-04-21 10:50:21 +0000 UTC

Comments

Michael

Ok, instantly one of his coolest skills. Allows him to look into the past and learn the concepts of the viper. The benefits of this will probably be obvious even when he reaches godhood.

James Faulkner

Thanks for the chapter!

Blake Richardson

Thanks for the chapter

Bob Dole

could be more context, could just be because it's ancient history

Senjo

Hmm. And Jake is ok with being buddy buddy with a genocidal maniac?

Johnny Smithers

"Jake closed his eyes as he focused on his Path of the Heretic-Chosen as he tried to get it to activate" using "as" twice here makes the wording really awkward in my opinion. Probably want to re-word that. "In its wake always followed death and destruction" --> "Death and destruction always followed in its wake" "Getting nothing but a breath of toxic green energy in return as the wyvern attacked." Not a complete sentence, needs a subject. Starting with "he got nothing..." could work. "As it flew, its form became smaller, shrinking from being a several hundreds of meters long monstrosity to only being about a dozen meters from head to tail." Cutting the second "being" would make it flow better. You use "Manifold" which means many. in this context it essentially says "His speed increase many" which doesn't work. You probably want "Manyfold" which means by a lot. That would make more sense. Also the fact that these nearly identical words with subtly different meanings exist is yet more proof that English was a mistake. "claim what was rightfully the Protectors." --> "Protector's"

Jonatan

This is a good way to introduce him & the readers to other worlds, culture, races and power levels above himself. 10/10 would read again.

Zogarth

Fixed.

Sean Wilner

canals of history -> annals of history

Zogarth

fixed

Zogarth

fixed

Chris

Lay its eyes > laid its eyes

Chris

The gem had been that power, should be been what powered

James Squibb

This was great!

Zogarth

Fixed. Please include a few words around the edit next time, is a bit hard to find.

joshjosh100

attack -> attacked

Zogarth

Fixed.

lockx

With bots legs > with both legs

BlackRazaras

Thanks for the chapter


More Creators