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Chapter 32: A Day in the Village

🕑 Added 2020-12-01 21:17:59 +0000 UTC

Comments

Colby Last

Sorry to be a downer, but better in the comments than a review. I really don't care for chapters like this. There are two goals with character interactions. 1)Advance the plot. 2)Develop the character. If you can't do either, just skip/summarize it. The reason I say this doesn't develop the characters is because it's unfocused. Jumping between 6 characters in a mish mash of idle chatter on the level of talking about the weather just isn't interesting. Taking a bath, registering at an inn, giving a round of greetings to people... The best character development scenes are 1v1 and they don't chat about the baths. I'm honestly on the verge of dropping this. I can see the idle banter getting worse and you are starting to grow a team. The team is probably one of the worst things you can do to a fiction. Just look at "He Who Fights With Monsters" who used to top the best rated list, now he's at 3 stars because he's increasingly focused on teamplay. Teamplay is almost never done well.

SunriseCV

I'm pretty sure that I've written, "Checked his system for the time." Once or twice in the story.

RanaSuilep

Good chapter. Just an FYI and something people often forget in stories, you had the villagers refer to a set amount of time. That implies they have clocks of some kind, which in turn implies a certain level of tech. Counting time is a modern thing people take for granted.


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