chunwa
patreon
Chapter 198: [Red Night Palace]
🕑 Added 2019-09-15 09:14:49 +0000 UTCWhen I write dialogue, I often wonder whether I'm too long-winded. Every character has several sentences worth of speech, and it switches between that. Do you enjoy longer speech parts or should I try to cut down on that? Also, tell me if the brothel scenes are completely wrong, I've never been to a bar or a brothel before. Hope you enjoy ~
The hostess seized up Nisha rather overtly, and the dragon recognized that she was being appraised.
As this was her first visit and they had never communicated like this before, she guessed that it was inevitable for the other side to practice caution and allowed the woman dressed in thin cloth threatening to slip off her body at any moment to observe as much as she liked.
Her state of dress certainly helped to convince the dragon to make more allowances.
“Allow me to introduce myself. I am called Velvet, and I work directly under the boss.
What exactly can the [Red Night Palace] do for you?”
Producing her best smile, Velvet secretly drew some conclusions from her observations.
A young elven girl, with fair skin and showing first hints of her growing curves, visited an adult establishment alone with an invitation card issued by the seat in charge of the red light district.
Perhaps, the store on the card in this rotation did not allude to the procurement of goods and materials, but rather to the purchase of human resources …
Nisha had no idea that the hostess suddenly developed a strange notion in her head and reciprocated the greeting.
“My name is Nisha, and I have discussed a certain transaction with Carmen, who I assume is your boss?
Anyway, I got this card and the message that she wanted to review that deal, hence I came over.
Do you know when she will be back?”
The elf took another sip of the sparkly water. It tickled the back of her nose and the prickly taste suited her palate quite nicely.
I wonder what this beverage is called. In the future, I have to buy some and bring it back home for the others.
Happy enough to wait for the Golden Heel, Carmen, who apparently dealt with something else at the moment, Nisha smiled and continued to study Velvet.
Her words inadvertently gave quite a shock to the hostess.
Not many people had the audacity to directly address her superior by her name directly, without any honorifics or using her more well known alias, Golden Heel.
Furthermore, they discussed a deal directly? That meant that the values involved definitely exceeded Velvet’s authority.
Prompted by the shock, the hostess observed the elf even more in-depth.
Piece by piece, small details emerged that gave even more context.
A poised bearing, the knees closed and slanted to the side, gracefully sipping on the beverage and quality clothes from expensive material.
The blue scarf hid some of her features, but it was not uncommon to wear hooded capes in the red light district when high ranking personages visited.
Rather than using it to obscure her face, the elf had all the grace and bearing of a noble daughter.
Combined with her earlier insight, the delusion inside Velvet’s head gained another layer of complexity.
The offspring of a declining noble house met the Golden Heel, a seat in charge of the [Red Night Palace] and struck a deal.
Afterwards, the girl voluntarily came over to begin her path as a star, her young features already promising the future of a legendary seductress …
When the hostess arrived at this point with her thoughts, a blush crept on her face and steam threatened to shoot from her ears.
Obviously, the dragon had no idea what the party opposite of her made up on her own and wondered why her countenance reddened.
Velvet fantasized for a while longer and spun an exceedingly intricate drama inside her imagination, when she finished her drink and subsequently broke out of her reverie.
“Excuse me, I had something else to think about for a moment.
The boss left earlier to handle some matters, perhaps around midnight or later will she return.
Without an appointment, Sera Carmen does not usually receive visitors and has no set schedule.
If you don’t mind me asking, did you come over right after obtaining the card?”
Speaking up to that point, the hostess apparently had some kind of enlightenment and asked a question.
“Indeed, a messenger delivered it earlier, and I came over directly. Is there an issue with that?”
On the territory of another power, the [Thieves Guild] and the Golden Heel specifically, the dragon was forced to treat with caution.
Inquiring about the rules and customs now would save her time later on.
“Not a problem, not really. It’s more or less a difference in habits.
You see, when anyone receives an invitation to the [Red Night Palace], most of the time the guest will have to arrange a suitable opportunity first - very rarely do they have the opportunity to make it right away.
Similarly, for this district, the current period is rather early, all of the shops here operate during the night, until the sun goes up.
When you combine both, it’s really no miracle that you missed the boss, sorry about that.”
Velvet fetched a new bottle while speaking and gave the elf an endearing chuckle during her explanation.
The innocent girl really had no idea and looked extremely adorable to her.
It further cemented her secret fantasy about Nisha as a possible reality.
Pretty much anyone that had prior contact with the redlight district knew the ins and outs, at least to some extent.
“I see, such a coincidence that I got the worst possible timing.
Thank you for the information, I had no idea that the shop belonging to Carmen only operated at night.
The name makes sense, [Red Night Palace], is indeed quite fitting then.”
Nisha did not mind making a wasted trip. Since the Golden Heel wanted to see her and quite possibly discuss matters related to their cooperation, it did not hurt to learn about their meeting place in advance.
For example, if they were discussing something outside of this office, she would have had no idea if anyone sat inside and watched them through the cleverly arranged illusions and peepholes.
She was quite curious about this place too, as the opulence and lavishness of the constructions and decorations neared the quality of a duke household.
“If you do not mind, I can to some extent represent Miss Carmen, it’s my duty as the gate watcher.
However, should the matter you want to discuss require privacy, you can either return at a later time or I can entertain you until the boss returns.
It’s your call.”
The hostess meant her words. The unfinished fantasy in her head made the woman giddy to know more, to see if she was right or not.
Even if she was not correct in her assumptions, just as the young elf eyed her with obvious adoration, she also enjoyed the unrefined and charming innocent flower before her.
“That’s very kind of you.
To confess the truth, I have briefly met Carmen before and we discussed some things, but I do not know what exactly her current topic to talk with me is about.
Since I don't exactly know, it’s probably pointless to repeat everything to you, and then guess which exactly is the problem.
If it’s not a burden, I will wait for your boss to return and accept your hospitality for the meantime.”
Nisha was not entirely averse to the idea.
While some of the people back at the Dharnas estate might worry in case she stayed out for a night, there was no restriction on her free time either.
Additionally, the [Red Night Palace] appeared like a fantastic wonderland to her unblemished eyes, missing some obvious signs that indicated the true nature of a redlight district.
Despite the bright facades and smiling faces everywhere, the darkness cowered around the corners and sometimes reared its ugly face when hapless visitors expected it the least.
Thankfully, the two women currently resided in the seat of power lording over the entire district, protected from all the shady characters and potential dangers.
“Of course, an honored guest of Sera Carmen is always welcome in our establishment, no matter how long you stay.
Our kitchen should be just about to be ready to serve the first dishes, and the seats are not yet all taken, how about we change locations and head to the first floor?
A good meal is the duty of every keeper, and while I might not be on duty for the floors today, I can still keep you company.
Should we head down?”
Velvet stretched like a languid cat, a professional habit picked up long ago and executed without really meaning to.
Nonetheless, it never failed to draw gazes and influence the whims of others, as the young elf before her agreed absentmindedly.
In some twisted way, the hostess really enjoyed messing with such an innocent girl, who probably had no idea what exactly her job entailed.
“Perfect.”
At some level, the dragon recognized the foreign influence on her state of mind. Between the clarity of serious talk and being a moth that threw herself into a pretty flame, the most basic beast inside her identified the problem and filed it away quietly.
Still, giving in to a temporary while once every now and then is probably fine. Definitely. As long as I’m aware of it …
Her thoughts trailed off again as the target she focused on hopped through the room and looked left and right before hiding two empty bottles in a cabinet.
Seeing that the elf looked directly at her, Velvet winked and put a finger to her lips, which were just so red and full …
-------------------------------
In a chamber deep beneath the ground, the target of discussion of the elf and the hostess currently observed a humanoid creature slamming itself against a reinforced glass wall, supported by a foundation enchanted with multiple spells.
No matter how ferocious the creature behaved, its rampage never even made cracks in the sturdy structure.
Unimpressed at the attempts, the Golden Heel turned around and addressed the dark robed figure standing in a damp corner of the room.
“Is it not too fast, even for the [Blackroot Plague]? Degenerating so fast is highly unusual, right?”
Originally a human, the frenzied monster had black vines growing from its skin, mottled skin with open patches of rootwork showing beneath, and dried sockets where the eyes used to be.
It looked more undead and alien than humanoid, and it took a lot of imagination to connect it with a foreign sailor, who the monster used to be.
“It’s a side effect from my studies. In an effort to find a method to control the spread of the plague, the means unintentionally accelerated the process.
From what is known about the plague, it starts with an infection, small seeds contaminating the body through food or contact.
Afterwards, the plague grows over a period of time. It’s not even particularly noticeable in the incubation period, aside from an undefined sense of fatigue and tiredness.
Only when the roots are ready to spread will a growing pain set in, from the core to the limbs, but it’s already too late to prevent a further spread, the host will have already have released countless contaminants and likely doomed others.
When the first roots break through the skin, the host is already more or less dead and the brain will shut down.
The final process only involves a rapid decay and a final release of seeds, tiny to the eye but deadly nonetheless.
Without the spells in this holding cell, this monster would seek to inflict as much harm as possible and spread the [Blackroot Plague], tainting the land where they break down.”
The Alchemist, another seat of the [Thieves Guild] dispassionately recounted the general course an afflicted human went through.
He had seen it once before, yet he had no methods to solve it through his own means.
Comments
HattmanHendrix
Dialogue can be used to flesh out a character even beyond the literal meaning. How someone speaks there accent the mannerisms they use are all powerful tools.
Thenks for the chapter! And who cares if some might think the dialog or something else should be whatever they think insted of what they come read, we pay patron here to read your story and this means we like your storys, like they are! You liking your story and enjoying righting it is most imporpent, atleast in my opinion. Happy author with a good book is grate, unsetteld or rushd author with a awsome book that get droopd or shortend midway is enoyying. XD
The dialogue is fine. It gives exposition to the story and context outside of what you, the omniscient narrator, can or should tell us. It also allows for the characterization of newly introduced personas.
RuRo
Don't worry, your dialogue patterns are fine. I've seen some authors try to artificially shorten the spoken sentences or decrease the number of sentences, because "that's how people speak in real life". IMHO, that's not actually how people speak. If you remove the intermittent "uh-huh"s and "I see"s, normal dialogue can easily span up to 5-7 medium length sentences per character. In my opinion, "short" exhanges only happen in reactionary dialogue, not during discussions.
