AuthorPalt
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Tutorial Rewrite 93
🕑 Added 2023-01-31 07:57:16 +0000 UTC—Lobby. You really are too predictable, system. You know that, right? And now you’ll sell my inventory, because I’m clearly not using any of it.
<To repay your debt,
your inventory has been sold
for 3 500 points.>
That’s… a very exact number. Considering that I don’t think I had anything sellable in my inventory apart from the book, that would mean that this was the price for the book, huh? I wonder how much it hampered my ever-growing debt?
<Current debt:
115 228 points.>
…Ah. Yeah, uh, that actually makes sense. Still…
Six-figure debt. Here we are. I wish I could react more strongly, but I just feel numb. There’s just no realistic way for me to pay this back, is there?
So, as you usually do with impossible problems, I’m just going to ignore it! Hakuna matata and all that. Let’s check the time in the meanti—
<You have received a message.>
Hm? A message? From who?
<Status—Community—Top>
<Personal Messages>
<[NEW]SuperMoleman[F52]: Congrats on beating the floor!>
<[NEW]SuperMoleman[F52]: Checking in again.
Please respond if you’re able to.>
<[NEW]FarmerOfBlades[F32]: Have u die yet?>
<[NEW]SuperMoleman[F52]: Checking in again,
did everything go alright with the floor?>
<[NEW]ExplosionBeyond[F29]: Wither In A Hole,
You Inhuman Martinet>
<[NEW]SuperMoleman[F52]: Are you okay?
Sorry to spam your inbox but I’m worried.>
<[NEW]SuperMoleman[F52]: Did everything go
alright with the floor?>
<[NEW]PranksterGangster[F47]: I’m with
your mother. She wants you to also suck me.>
For a minute or two, I just stare at my inbox.
…I forgot to tell Moleman I survived. Erm. Uh… With trembling hands, I open the most recent PM.
<SuperMoleman[F52]: Congrats on beating the floor!
Sorry that I sent so many messages,
I could see that you were still alive
since your profile hadn’t gotten auto-deleted,
but I still felt worried. There are worse
fates than death, after all. But I’m happy to see
that you were able to beat the floor! I didn’t
doubt it for a moment. How did it go?
I talked with Bach about the floor,
and she said a pair of gorgons would appear
after five and thirty-one hours respectively.
Did these go alright?>
Slowly, I draw in a deep, deep breath.
He isn’t mad at me. He was just worried. That’s all. I don’t have to feel afraid or anything. Still, for some reason, I don’t want to reply. If I just ignore him, I won’t have to worry about his response. But—but that’s cowardly! And I’m not a coward. Never.
My fingers tremble, but I still put them to the keyboard.
<PrissyKittyPrincess[F10]: um ya
i beat da flor it wuz kinda hard n stuff
an uhhhh da reson i messaged u is cuz
a big snek 8 me witch wuz bad bt now im ok
i bcame a meatball at 1 point but i jus had 2 get
8 by anotter snek and i wus ok
srry 2 worry u i relly thoght i wuz gonna die>
I press send. Silently sweating, I wring my hands, trying not to let the thoughts get to me. He isn’t mad at me. He said so. But what if he’s mad at me anyways? Sometimes people say they aren’t mad but they’re actually super mad. People do that a lot, actually. They say they’re happy but they’re actually sad, or they say they’re disappointed when they’re actually angry, or they say they love you when they really hate you. I don’t get it. Wouldn’t everything be much simpler if we were just honest with each other? I just don’t—
<You have received a message.>
I press the pop-up faster than my brain can even read it.
<SuperMoleman[F52]: Eaten by a snake…
Glad you made it out alright! I just hope
you didn’t escape it the, uh, natural way,
but I’m happy you were able to make it through
regardless. On Easy, you only need to stay in
the room for four hours, and according to Bach,
the Hard difficulty challengers had to stay there
for forty-eight hours. I can’t imagine having
to stay there for an entire attempt, with all the snakes,
their bodies piling up higher and higher…
But you made it through, and that’s what matters.
You really do amaze me sometimes, you know that?
Good luck with the tenth floor, it’s a real doozy!>
I don’t really know how to respond to that. I made him worry that much, and I didn’t even send him a single message, and now he just wants to smooth it over like it never happened? That’s just… so much like him. Why do I always expect him to blow up in my face? This is all so weird.
Anyhow, I can’t just leave him on read, so I quickly type up a response and send it.
<PrissyKittyPrincess[F10]: thx u2
ur messag ment a lot withut it
i prolly woulda died so thx
ur a good friend>
<SuperMoleman[F52]:
You’re a good friend too, Kitty.
See you soon!>
I stare at his message, stunned. He—he said it. He agreed. He… he said I was his friend.
My vision turns a little blurry but that’s quickly undone by fiercely wiping at my eyes. I—I’m okay, I’m fine, I just… I mean, Simel is also my friend, but he never said it back, it was just kind of there, but Moleman, he just, he just went straight out and…
Sniffle. A friend. We’re friends.
I have a friend.
<[Now that you’re finished
with your personal affairs,]>
<A change has been made.>
<Would you like to enter
Floor 10 early?>
<Yes/No>
H—huh? Wh… what? What’s that supposed to mean?
I blink, and I rub at my eyes, but the message isn’t going away. It’s just hanging there, motionless. Asking for a simple response.
I can feel my nose wrinkle. This is… weird. Bad. Untrustworthy. The gods are up to something, again. I don’t trust it. Not in the least. I’ve seen more trustworthy signs in gas station bathrooms.
<The God of Harvest
sighs.>
<If [Yes] is chosen,
100 000 points will be
deducted from your debt.>
C—come again? A hundred thousand? With a big h?
Frankly speaking, this bribe just makes the whole dead even more suspicious, but on the other hand… Ten thousand points. A HUNDRED THOUSAND. Do you know how many princess cakes I could buy with that?! Technically zero, but that doesn’t matter! A hundred thousand… That’ll bring my debt basically back to zero! And, sure, maybe they’ll hate me and make it go right back up to a hundred large again, but…
A hundred thousand. It’s an offer I just can’t refuse.
Even though it’s suspicious, even though I don’t trust a single god, I still press the yes button. Because of course I do. I don’t exactly have any choice, do I—
