Dieselbrain
patreon
[Major Announcement] Moving on.
🕑 Added 2025-07-10 19:56:16 +0000 UTCHowdy y'all.
Those of you who have been following my work and my crowdfunding campaigns for a while are probably aware that I have been battling burnout for multiple years now. I'm sure many of you have noticed that I seem to have periods of productivity, and periods where I am heavily stymied by my burnout. I've been trying to fight this, basically as far back as 2018, with limited success.
After all this time, ive had to come to a very hard decision. I cannot do art as my career anymore. I don't have any gas left in the tank, and I cannot keep treading water like this. I am deeply unhappy with making art, and my monetization of art has utterly destroyed my relationship with my own creativity. Even on the best of days, even when i have an IDEA that i WANT to draw, I have to fight through intense, painful anxiety every step of the way. I feel alienated and disconnected from myself, my desires, my sexuality, my passion. I've tried my hardest to push through, I've tried touching grass and taking breaks and nothing works. I cannot do this anymore. I cannot handle having something so important to me as my own creativity, my relationship with art, cause me so much pain.
WHAT IS THE PLAN GOING FORWARD?
After discussing options with my wife Carbonoid, I have decided that I am going to attempt to transition into a career in Body Piercing. I am choosing this path for a number of reasons. Firstly, it is a non-creative field, where im not going to be drawing, or designing things, so the part of my brain that has been overworked in a creative field for over 10 years now, can finally rest. Secondly, it is a job that can effectively utilize the hand eye coordination and manual dexterity that I already have from my time making art. And thirdly, since Carbonoid works in tattooing, they are able to help me navigate this transition period.
I am not able to immediately switch over to such a job quite yet however, as I still need to get a work permit in order to hold a Canadian job. It is going to take an indeterminate amount of time to get that, so in the meantime i will be focusing on training in piercing, and tying up loose ends.
WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO PATREON/SUBSTAR, COMMISSIONS ETC?
As I said above, I cannot get this new job immediately. It is going to take at least a few months to secure the work permit, to my understanding. To that end, I will not be shutting down my Patreon/Subscribestar etc until I have the work permit confirmed. I will be finishing up outstanding commissions, and possibly taking on a few new ones just to tide things over if needed.
Any support on here is helpful to me and our family during this transition, and I will be trying my best to update things with a little more art before finally closing things down once a work permit has been secured. If you don't want to continue subscribing to my work, I completely understand, and I think you for the support you have me up until now. If you DO want to continue supporting me during this transition, then i offer you my deepest thanks. I have always been humbled by the generosity of my supporters. I'm sorry I could not make this work.
ARE YOU EVER GOING TO DRAW AGAIN?
After the career transition is complete, I'm likely going to need to not even so much as think about drawing for a while. IDK how long. I hope not too long, but i cannot predict how much time i will need.
But I want to say that I am sure that one day, whether it's sooner or later, I will return to making, and posting, art. I just wont be doing it as a job.
FINAL THOUGHTS
It is difficult to not feel like a failure. I tried to make this work as a career since about 2013. I made so many friends in this field. I met my wife through making porn! I have deeply loved making porn, and it has enriched my life in so many ways. It hurts me deeply that I could not make it work as a career, despite my best efforts. It hurts that work i love so much, has in recent years caused me so much pain.
Something I want to be clear about, is none of this has been fueled by the community of people who have loved and shared and supported my work all these years. I loved making art for you, I love so many of my clients who have shown me nothing but kindness. So many of you have been in my corner through some extremely tough times, and i cannot put into words how indebted i am to every single one of you who is reading this.
Thank you for everything.
Comments
Dieselbrain
sorry lol
Burger.com
I just subbed lmao
Dieselbrain
sure thing. ill be closing down the discord eventually, but if you wanna hop in and meet folks in the meantime, here is a link https://discord.gg/8PahSUQN
Patato352
I had suspended my subscription since I was a bit unsatisfied by the quantity of new art coming out but after reading this I understand completely why that is. I renewed my donation for another month and I wish you happiness and succes in your new carrier <3 Ps: could I have the link to the discord before it gets closed, I dont have a clue how to dm you :(.
