Javier owo
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February 2025 Update: A very rough start to the Year...
🕑 Added 2025-02-01 19:20:24 +0000 UTCIts... kind of been a nightmare so far Im not even gonna sugar coat it. With the recent events in the US, a lot of things just got harder if they weren't already hard enough.
its been hard to work without feeling so miserable and so drained from all the chaotic events, and now with the risk of me or my family being taken away at any point. I don't normally talk about these things but I thought it would be appropriate to disclose a bit of how I've been behind the scenes. Me and a couple of close friends are worried about everything.
Things are sketchy and risky. Hell, it's hard to get groceries safely.
2 things also ended up happening in January with my Main laptop locked in Bitlocker Recovery mode because the refurbishing company included it for some reason. And my glasses ended up snapping in half yet again,,,
My luck has been not so good and despite those setbacks, I still need to wait till next week or two to get my recovery key from Microsoft, and my glasses still haven't come in as they typically take 4-5 weeks to be made with Medicare.
So not ONLY do I have to make do with my backup laptop and iPad, I have to do it while blind. It feels like the universe is against me like it is for everyone else who now has to live in fear in the US. There is a lot of bad happening globally, and I can only hope we keep one another and push on hard.
Im exhausted, and it doesn't help I'm still behind and having to take on EXTRA work just to make ends meet, I don't feel proud having to tell those waiting to wait even more, despite saying "yer all good please take yer time"
I hate being so incompetent. But I can't really self-loath for too long, I've got a job to do... And Ive gotta just suck it up buttercup until I'm eventually done.
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To those who were kind enough to be so generous so that I could even eat or order things like groceries and or necessities, thank you. You know who you are, and I feel so ashamed for not being stronger or faster.
Im so sorry for being stuck with bad luck for so long. I want to be done... I want to finish an animation I still owe someone who has been waiting for 2 Years now. I want to be done with comms. I want to work on my game... I just don't want to live in fear and Anxiety. I want to be stronger so that I too can help people back once I get myself in check.
Ive been trying to stay positive... The picture above is actually me spending time to draw my boy,, my son,,
Im happy just seeing that he is happy, playing and vibing to his favorite music. My little Lycanpebble <3
Anyway um... Sorry for rambling, it's super unprofessional but I did need to dump a lot of my emotions out because I don't think I ever managed to vent and process myself during all of January. Im exhausted, and tired but I wanna recover naturally. My wrists still aren't the best but I can't just give up.
I hope to post more soon, sorry its all just wips. I have so many more wips but they are so rough and id rather they be more developed cause the ideas are pretty spicy haha~
Thank you for your patience and support, I'm against all odds at the moment, but I refuse to go down.
