Torsten Hewson
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DEFUNCT v7c30.
🕑 Added 2026-02-01 07:24:48 +0000 UTCAfter commanding their cultivators to deal with things, naturally, the next step was to go to bed; Chanchou was utterly exhausted by the entire boring day, and so she slept soundly. She awoke quite early, however, quite excited to show her sister the error of her ways… but things were strange in the morning.
“What do you mean nobody arrived last night?” Father demanded to one of their servants, who had been instructed to receive their “guests”.
“Nobody arrived, My Lord.” The servant repeated. “We have had no contact from the people who you said would arrive.”
“Lazy, no good bastards.” Father muttered under his breath. He swiftly went up to his room, and ripped in half another talisman. He waited. And waited. And waited some more.
When after twenty minutes, no cultivators materialized, he sent servants to the palace they kept to go and find the man.
However, when their minor transmission stone buzzed… it was not with good news.
“It's empty, My Lord.” the servant stated.
“....what do you mean, empty.” Her father grit out.
“I mean what I say, My Lord. The palace servants said they were dismissed late last night by Master Ye Shun, and so they went to the servants quarters. Now there is no furniture, no luxuries, no food—they even extracted the gold and jade from the inlay in the meditation rooms.”
Chanchou’s jaw dropped. Her husband’s eyes bulged. Even father looked utterly baffled, before rage overtook him.
“Perfidious, feckless—this is why one should never trust a cultivator. Their oaths are worthless. The Azure Jade Trading company must have somehow offered them something. Our informants said they had a lot of cultivation resources. And of course, the peasant chose that over his honour.” Father snarled, before glaring off to the side.
But… if the cultivator is gone, and the Auditor still has all of our records... Chanchou paled.
“Wha—what do we do then?” Chanchou asked. “They still have to be bluffing, don’t they?”
Father just stared at her.
“Idiot girl.” was all he said, and Chanchou flinched. “They’ve had some minor victories, so now they’ll think they are invincible. We have to—”
He paused at the frantic knocking at the door.
“Enter,” he commanded.
A servant poked their head in. “My Lord. A special session of court has been called by the Lord Governor and the Lord Magistrate of Pale Moon Lake City, on behalf of the Auditor General and the Lord Director of Civil Service Examinations. They have asked you to attend, My Lord. They sent a guard contingent. They say that they are here to protect us from… unrest.”
Chanchou’s breathing hitched.
Father frowned. “I see,” he said, then lowered his voice. “How many men do they have with them?”
The servant, still nervous, swallowed. “At least a hundred. The other lookouts reported the city guard forming a cordon. My Lord, what—”
“That is enough.” Father commanded. “Worry not, there is merely a political matter that must be attended to.”
The servant nodded hesitantly, before backing away and closing the door.
“They do not want us running, it seems.” her husband mused. Chanchou on the other hand, felt her heart beating out of her chest.
“Wha—what do we do—” she started her voice rising, but then something hit her. Heat and pain exploded in her cheek. And the room spun. Chanchou blinked the stars out of her eyes, to see her father retracting his hand.
“Control yourself!” Father commanded.
Her head whipped to her husband, who said nothing about the strike. In fact, he wasn’t looking at her at all. His eyes were narrowed into the distance past the window. They were cold and calculating. Chanchou swallowed, and clasped her hands together in her lap.
“They want to make us bleed. Very well. It appears your sister and her peasant were willing to go to war. Will will bleed for this; so they must bleed too.” Father declared.
Father took a scroll, and began to write. Chanchou just sat, her hands folded in her lap, and trying to ignore the stinging in her cheek.
Father called in another servant when he was done. “Send this transmission to our men in Grass Sea City and Yellow Rock Plateau. Open bounty.” Father said, then rose, and turned to look at Chanchou’s husband.
“We will endure this.” he stated simply, “as we have endured since the Age of Heroes. Now, let us play with this peasant.”
Chancou’s husband turned to her father, and smiled. It was the smile he smiled when he had to, and when he didn’t like somebody.
“Of course. I have no doubt of our eventual victory.” her husband said.
The men nodded at each other. Both of them had cold eyes.
The stirrings of fear, quelled by pain, started up again.
….this was all her sister’s fault. If she hadn’t…Chanchou bit the thought off.
================================
Three hours later, they were within the great hall of the Palace of Pale Moon Lake. It was the most important place in the Province, and a slice of Imperial Majesty Chanchou knew was the envy of Grass Sea City.
Banners of deep reds and golds draped the walls like a cloak; The proud Phoenix stared from every one of them. The wood was smooth, lacquered by the finest artisans, and more than that, was the art. While most of it was from the Azure Hills, there were vases from as far away as Ivory Cloud Savannah, forty thousand Li to the south east. Wood Block prints from Victory Flame Bay. A glowstone mount the size of a house that came from Amber Sap Thicket; an menagerie of stuffed and preserved exotic animals; each one was an ancient thing, occasionally brought over over the thousands of years of Empire… and each one showing the sheer scope of the Dominion of the Phoenix.
It had always been a place Chanchou was comfortable in. The majesty. But right now it was just making her feel ill while they passed through it. Their carriage had been followed the entire time by the city guard, and even now they had been received by the Palace’s household troops. Their shiny, perfect armor gleamed in the noon sun.
The main courtroom itself was similarly opulent; The cushions were silk, and plump. A throne, obscured by flames, stood empty at the back of the room upon a raised dias: the symbolic seat of the Emperor, never to be filled.
Below that was a less impressive throne, the seat of the Lord Governor, and to the right of that the Seat of the Lord Magistrate of Pale Moon Lake.
The titanic hall was mostly filled already; the courtiers were eager to see the reason why this meeting had been called by the Auditor General and the Lord Director of Civil Service Examinations—both of whom were already seated before the empty thrones, attendants and aides beside them.
She glared at the dog who had bitten her hand, but the peasant auditor had no eyes for her. And.. where was her sister? Or the peasant she had married? Neither of them were anywhere to be seen.
She was so consumed with looking for the wretches, that she didn’t notice when her husband left, and sat in his own location, at the seat of the Master of the treasury. Normally he took her with him, when she sat in on—
She didn’t have time to think any harder, however, as there was the ring of a gong. Everyone who had been talking instantly went silent, and rose. The Lord Governor and the Lord Magistrate of Pale Moon Lake entered. Both were rather corpulent older men.. And sometimes people mistook one for the other, though they weren’t related. Both of them had rather grim looks on their faces.
Then the Herald of the Azure Hills began the rituals; declaring the year, the date, and all other boring minutiae before the rest of them were allowed to sit as well.
“And now, we do declare that this court is in session!” The man finished. “Glory to the Crimson Phoenix Empire! May its flame shine eternal!”
“Glory to the Crimson Phoenix Empire! May its flame shine eternal!” the rest of court echoed back.
Then, all were allowed to sit.
“This special session of court has been called by the Auditor General of the Azure Hills, and the Lord Director of Civil Examinations for the Azure Hills.” The Lord Director stated, his voice carrying out over the hall. It is of great concern to His Imperial Majesty’s government; and backed by the word of two trusted men. Auditor General. I have heard your preliminary assessment. Enlighten the court first as how you came about these findings..”
“Yes, Lord Governor.” the rat said, rising to his feet. “This Shen Yanjing, Auditor General of the Azure Hills, accuses the Wu Clan of bribery, corruption, conspiracy, arson, and assassination!” the peasant declared. “As shown in the Wu Clan’s own records.” He raised their scrolls high, and the court immediately erupted into exclamations of shock.
And yet father simply raised a brow.
“These are not ours.” Father stated.
“Oh? I’m rather certain they are.” the rat said, narrowing his eyes.
“Are you? If they are ours, that would mean the Auditor General raided the home of the Wu Clan when we were away.” Father reposted.
The room erupted into murmurs again. Several nobles looked disturbed by the statement. Eyes narrowed at Yanjing, from those who were in the Wu’s camp—and more than that, the neutral, and even some of their enemies suddenly realised what such an action meant.
Raiding the house of a noble family with impunity? They all had skeletons under their floorboards. That was a dangerous precedent.
Yet the peasant remained unphased. “Indeed they are from your house, which I raided, as outlined in the powers granted to me by His Imperial Majesty.” The Auditor stated boldly.
The murmuring got louder. The looks the peasant were receiving started becoming hostile. They would indeed bleed; yet if this continued, the peasant would have to watch over his shoulder for the rest of his life.
And then a thin old hand raised, and the entire court went silent.
The Lord Director of Civil Service Examinations rose to his feet.
“The raid upon the manse of a noble was not done in haste, nor without considering other avenues.” the old man said, his voice quiet and mild, yet all heard his words. “It was this humble servant of His Imperial Majesty who advised the course of action, when Junior Yanjing sought the council of his elder. He presented overwhelming evidence. Evidence that included the attempted assassination of a Sitting Lord Magistrate, and the successful assasination of another."
With those words, the mood of the entire court shifted instantly. The hostility that was brewing against the auditor dissipated instantly—and instead the courtiers and junior magistrates turned their accusing gazes upon the Wu once more.
There was pandemonium. Men shouted accusations. They rose to their feet and cursed.
The gong was struck again. “Silence!” The Lord Governor commanded; and it was so. “These are grave accusations; and given to me by trusted men. But worse, they implicate a member of my own government. Master of the Treasury. You are often in the company of the Wu Clan. What say you of these accusations?”
“I knew nothing of them.” Her husband stated, sitting across the hall from her. “Naturally, if the Auditor General’s documents are true… then I must condemn the Wu Clan.”
Chanchou stared at her husband. She had always laughed at the plays in court of those beneath her. Of people scrambling to save their own skin.
Somehow, in this moment…. It didn’t feel funny.
===============
The Lord Magistrate of Verdant Hill watched it all from the viewing gantries in the back, his wife sitting beside him and holding his hand. Xue Ji stood behind them, a small, amused smile on her lips.
The accusations were quite extensive. And quite damning. An extensive record of bribery, corruption, assassinations, strategic arson, purposeful famines… even his wife was rather shocked at just how much her family had written down and stored in that archive—as well as the depths that they had fallen.
It wasn’t just the money and the fraud; his wife’s father had apparently withheld aid during a famine so more people would have to sell themselves into indentured servitude. The confirmation that they had assassinated a sitting Lord Magistrate in the Grass Sea, who had blocked an expansion of one of their land holdings.
And while the Lord Wu tried to mount a defense, tried to turn the rich and powerful against the auditor.. It was for nothing. His own allies and own faction saw the sinking ship for what it was.
While the legal side of things was going down, he knew that the less than legal, off the books storehouses his wife knew of, and the Plum Blossom’s Shadow had confirmed were all being raided, and taken under new management; the enemies of the Wu were feasting on their guts while they were still alive.
While The Lord Magistrate was loathe to give up praise for being part of the group to take the Wu Clan down, and be on the floor making arguments and unveiling his enemies deeds… it was not the best course of action. What was some praise, weighed against being able to go home without fear?
He would be relegated to a single line in this sorry affair. If he appeared at all.
He closed his eyes as Justice was handed down.
The legal holdings of the Wu Clan would be seized. The head of the Wu Clan and all his subordinates would be seized and placed under arrest immediately, while the investigation continued.
…there was a high likelihood his wife’s father would be exiled or executed, as well as a great many more of her family.
He turned to his wife… yet he found her watching on with complete dispassion, when the Lord Governor finished reading his verdict.
“To think this all happened because Chanchou wanted to torment me one last time.” she said in a dispassionate voice.
“Any last words to her, My Lady? I can get you into the prison, if you wish.” Xue Ji stated, sounding darkly amused.
His wife snorted. “Theres nothing more to say between myself and that woman. She made her feelings clear with an assassination attempt. Now, let us speak no more on this. Lets find our dear students, and put this sorry business behind us.”
“...indeed. I do think a meal and good company would do wonders for us.” The Lord Magistrate agreed.
The rose, and started filing out, with many of the other onlookers. They were talking and laughing about the destruction of the Wu clan; they were quite gleeful about the likely impending executions. That they would have acted the same if it were any other clan was obvious yet… still tragic somehow.
The farcical performance of admonishments made him long for the peace of Verdant Hill.
“Its quite sad, but sometimes, I think getting hurt by that cultivator was the greatest thing that could have ever happened to me.” His wife whispered.
“Fate does work in mysterious ways.” he finally said.
The exited the Imperial Palace, in all its majesty, out into the sun and the warm breeze.
He hoped that this would be the last they ever saw of the Wus… but they also had to be prepared for anything they had set in motion.
He prayed for his son’s safety.
========================
Far, far away in Grass Sea City:
Gao Yuze of Yellow Rock Plateau grimaced under the moonlight. He had heard the stories about the Azure Hills, but he had never thought it would be this bad. The Qi here was abysmal. It felt like it was trying to eat his soul, this damn shit.
He glanced at the paper in his hand again, and the amount written on the bounty, and the irritation started to fade away. He had just ascended to the Profound Realm… by spending all of his money. And this bounty would sure as hell pay it all back. Being an independent was rough, and a job like this? It would set him up to at least the Third Stage.
So he had come down from the plateau, to this heavens forsaken place. It was a quick in and out. It would be worth it, even if the man did have a couple protectors.
…case in point, as he landed on the rooftop. Qi signatures. The air was messing with his ability to sense Qi, but he knew they were Initiate’s Realm.
Not one, not two, but three ladies landed in front of him.
“State your business." The shortest of them demanded. She was a cute thing, her hair in twin tails, with a light dusting of freckles on her cheeks, and wearing a green robe.
“Hes obviously here will Ill intenions. Let's just cut him down and be done with it.” The second one said, A true haughty beauty wielding a spear glared at him in a rather fetching way. She wore a blue and white dress, and her hair looked like silk.
The final one was some tribal girl. An exotic looking thing with tanned skin, a bandanna with a geometric pattern on it, and dark blue eyes. Her dark hair was done up in two braids, and she had a tattoo that started on her right hand that went up her wrist to mid forearm. A dagger tied to a rope was held loosely in her hands.
Yuze flared his own Qi in response, and smiled as they all stiffened.
“My business is my own, pretty sisters. Let me be on my way, and later I can show you all the sights of my home up on that plateau later. The best view is from my bedroom window.” he said, smiling at the fetching things. Against one from Yellow Rock Plateau, they would surely stand down; he heard that they barely got above the first or second stage around here—
“Absolutely not.” the slim beauty said.
“Disgusting.” the tall one sneered.
“Khöökh! He's a bit touched in the head, yeah?” The tribal barbarian uttered, butchering the proper tongue with her accent.
Yuze chuckled, even as a vein bulged in his forehead. “Very well then I'll play with you now.” He said, drawing his sword.
All three launched themselves at him, and he raised his blade confidently to meet their strikes—and then a rope suddenly wrapped around his leg and yanked.
His eyes widened at the sudden assault that dragged him off balance. A fourth?! He caught a glimpse of another form—the tribal woman was behind him, but in front still—no. Not the tribal woman. A mirror image. Twins.
The women’s Qi flared higher, and he got a better sense of it; that wasn’t the first or second stage, these women were at the fourth or fifth of the Initiate’s realm!
And it was four on one.
[The Harmony of Silk and Steel, First Form!]
Then the shortest woman’s blade split into twelve copies—and one of those blades split into a fan. It wavered and spluttered, the blades not quite all there.
[Coursing River, Shattering Waves!] The spear became a thundering rapid, heading for every vital point.
[Binding the Clouds!] Two voices shouted as one. The rope daggers weaved a net, sliding around his limbs.
===========================
An Ran of the Verdant Blade Sect panted, and wiped some blood off her sword in the predawn light. Shui Xinlai of the White Water Sect was favouring one leg. Oyun Sarantuya and Oyun Narantuya, twin sisters of the Grand Ravine, made sure that the most recent assailant’s wrists were bound.
"Yoy, Yoy! You girls weren’t kidding! The Magistrate certainly has a lot of flies after him!” Sarantuya chuckled, standing up and readjusting her headband, which was damp from her own sweat. Her eyes scanned the horizon, however, alert for any more threats. “This is the second one this night!”
“Khöörkhii döö. Must be stressful! We should give him a massage to relax!” Narantuya agreed with a little smirk, but similarly alert. The cut on her arm was freshly bandaged.
Both An Ran and Xinlai twitched at the blatant teasing. After the Acting Lord Magistrate had protected several families from the Grand Ravine from a mob, the Grand Ravine had decided to show their appreciation for the act by dispatching these two, to “protect a friend of the Grand Ravine, and assist the Grand Marshal of the Azure Hills.”
An Ran wished they had been men, rather than two stunning tribal beauties, who had instantly decided the most amusing thing to do would be to insert themselves into things.
Neither An Ran nor Xinlai could tell if they were serious or not—at least at the beginning. Now both of them were quite sure they had a new pair of devastating, extremely forward rivals who took great delight in reading everyone they could.
“Thankfully Rags warned us.” An Ran said, thankful the man had some people who kept an ear on the transmission stone networks. They had tried to hide this one, but the ragged-looking cultivator proved why he had An Ran’s teacher’s trust. “An open bounty, and for that much silver…?”
“I’m going to kill whoever put that out.” Xinlai agreed. “They’ll die a thousand deaths for this.”
“Oh! I know a good one! You cut open their back, break their ribs open, then tear their lungs out the hole!” Narantuya said, a bloodthirsty grin forming on her face.
“Makes them look like a fat, ugly bird.” Sarantuya chimed in.
“...that one has merit.” Xinlai declared.
“Lets just get ready for the next one.” An Ran said, sheathing her blade.
They had to hold the fort here—and trust Rags would get to the bottom of this.
====================
===================
And so it ends. The Wus, in prusuit of being petty assholes, bit off way more than they can chew... and try and chew it anyway.
And the Speical Inspector has to deal with the aftermath. Luckily, the man is well defended.
Google translate mongolian for the twin's exclaimations
Khöökh! Wow!
Yoy, Yoy!= Dearie me, dearie me! AKA: Mongolian ara, ara
Khöörkhii döö= Poor thing!
Edited By: Brandon “Philosophysics” Zhang-Leong
Comments
Shweta Narayan
I love this! reading, but fuck on one detail: whose point of view compares stuff to Chun Ke's size? it's Chanchou before and after.
fruit dragon
All of that can happen with them just making assumptions that are wildely incorrect just so meime gets a better sop Opra
Gwyn
Glad we got a re-write. I didn't think the previous version was bad, just kind of short and ended suddenly. That said, I can't fucking wait to return to the farm. Vajra's POV chapters have been my favorite literally since her first introduction, i'm hyped for her revenge Arc.
Bryan Rosser
I realize that we don't have any firm confirmation of the future relationship status between TLM and his wife and Xue Ji, but I'm already looking forward to the moment, Xue Ji, TLM, and Lady Wu all show up ready to spank TLM jr. I somehow expact that the cultivator girl harem are going to run into Xue Ji first, assume she's yet another rival for TLM jr, and then realize that the nice servant in the Spiritual realm is likely to become TLM jr's second mom. Think about what that means in this culture. TLM's second wife is in the Spiritual Realm. It will blow all the other cultivators minds. Plus, its going to be a really embarassing conversation between father and son.... "So, I see you've made some nice friends..... you too dad....." I'm sure CF's version will be much better written, but I feel like its going to happen, and that its likely going to happen before they get to Grass City.
ABTelford
I love this line “ What was some praise, weighed against being able to go home without fear?” It is simple yet profound, valuing a peaceful life more than fame. True wisdom and fitting this story’s vibe so very well! The description of taking the lungs out made me a little nauseous though - a bit too gory for this story in my opinion. This phrase didn’t make sense to me - maybe reading is the wrong word? “ rivals who took great delight in reading everyone they could.”
Randomosity
If you go to the Discord server and search for "the root is", you'll find a message from CF explaining it.
Daniel Wells
Have we heard anything about that weird root that Jin is slowly growing. Last thing I remember is that cloudy sword sect person could not identify it.
Arieh Sochaczevski
Thanks for the chapter!
Kreylix
This.
NaturesStressball
Much to his chagrin, his parents reactions will be hilarious
Often Irrelephant
Color me surprised - the cultivators stole the stuff that was nailed down, too. 😏
Seiden Kyoukai
And so the harem of TLM Jr. continues to expand...
CUI13
Thanks for the chapter. While you could've dragged the court part out more, gloating over the Wus wouldn't really feel in-character for the Magistrate or Jin. Given how immensely prepared they were, it makes more sense to just, put the ball in motion and then watch as every attempt the Wus make to retaliate gets thwarted.
Cranky Otter
Spectacular, aside from “what do we do now?” from a woman who is never without ideas on how to make things worse (https://x.com/realemirhan/status/2015892004022993133?s=42)
