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Chapter 640 - Iona’s Immortality
🕑 Added 2025-03-17 15:00:09 +0000 UTCAfter a decade of being with Iona, I knew all her little habits. I knew all her little expressions, from ecstatic to morose. I could guess how much sleep she had the previous night by her temper, I knew what she wanted for dinner.
After over a century together, to say that understanding had deepened was a bit of an understatement.
Two years after Sara gained her first class, I realized something was eating at my wife. Something she wasn’t telling me, even with a few gentle asks. Iona was spending an inordinate amount of time at the local temple, even when there were no services. Even when nobody else was around. Orthus wasn’t large enough, civilization hadn’t advanced enough, for there to be a full time [Priest] always at the temple, for there to always be activity. We were almost there, but Iona was vanishing a little before sundown in her full armor, and arriving shortly after sunrise with huge bags under her eyes. I knew a knightly vigil when I saw one, and her energy skill could only keep her going for so long.
It wasn’t quite to the point where I felt I needed to step in and force the issue. She wasn’t spending every night there, every other at worst.
Even Sara picked up on it. The four of us - Me, Iona, Sara, and Auri - were sitting around the breakfast table inside of [Manor] when the ten year old piped up.
“Mom? Is everything alright?” She asked.
“I’m alright.” Iona confirmed. The three of us traded looks, none of us believing her. Since Sara was noticing, I was going to push a little more.
“Let’s talk later?” I shot a significant look in Iona’s direction, wordlessly communicating we BETTER talk. If nothing else I was getting unhappy with the state of my cold and empty bed. Iona gave me a tiny nod, acknowledging the problem and that we’d discuss it, then masterfully redirected the conversation. Poor Sara, she never had a chance to insist.
She went off to poke at animals with Auri keeping an eye on her, and Iona and I sat down to talk.
“You’ve got something eating at you.” I said without preamble. “What’s going on?”
Iona frowned.
“Could you get me paper and something to write with?” She asked. “Some of this works better with a drawn timeline.”
I immediately got her what she wanted, and Iona started to sketch out a timeline.
“The first and easiest thing is the Valkyries.” Iona said, the light tension in her voice betraying a tiny slip over her masterful self control. “Nina and I have been tracking the stories and the tales. There just aren’t too many of us left, if any. I know of a few memorials, and I want to go on a long trip to gather up the remnants. Like your wall, I want to build a memorial hallway to my sisters-in-arms.”
She was blinking tears out of her eyes, and I put a hand on her arm to reassure her.
“Sara’s a little too young right now for me to vanish for a few months, nevermind the few years I suspect this might take. We’re looking at moving to the School soon, and that could be a good time to get started on this. The School flies around. It slows down, I pop down to the ground, investigate what I can, then return. I wanted to bring it up later, because there’s nothing we can do about it now.”
I reached over and squeezed Iona’s hand.
“You can certainly start looking around the area. Run over to a nearby town, talk for the day, run over at the end. You’re fast enough. Plus, we can have a nice bounty on the information. We can pay 10,000 arcs per final resting place, or something like that.”
I turned my head to look towards the door. Iona’s face lit up as she joined me.
“Damn. I was sure that would summon Amber with a full list of places.” I said.
“Give her a day or two, she probably got waylaid making even more money.” Iona joked.
=============
At the same time, in the Tuvan Tribes.
Amber tripped and fell hard, scraping her elbows and knees. A quick application of healing magic fixed her right up, and she turned to see what had caused her fall.
The lid of a broken treasure chest was poking out through the dirt, and Amber could see a deep pile of shining gems as large as her fist glittering in the light.
“Ooooh yes, my shinies.” She cooed.
===============
“That can’t be everything though. Something’s eating at you, and I mean no disrespect, but I don’t think deciding a timeline on when to go looking for your sister’s remains has you practically living in the temple.”
The mirth vanished off of Iona’s face.
“It’s not.” She agreed. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking.”
I lifted one eyebrow as if to say ‘no shit’, but didn’t directly press more. Iona looked torn. With a deep sigh, she started talking.
“You’re Immortal. So is Sara. Fenrir. Nina. Auri. It’s just… not fair for me to go on ahead and leave you all behind. Not when it’s so easy to fix. My issues with Immortals remains, but I’m seeing it as less and less of a reason to just die, instead of doing everything I can to fix problems where I see them.”
Every part of me wanted to shout and jump with excitement, but I used every last bit of willpower and self control to shut up and not ruin things.
“My whole family is Immortal, and I think I want to join you. I’m finishing working it all out. Can you give me some more time to think?”
All the petty complaints about a cold bed were gone from my mind.
“All the time in the world.” I promised.
==================
Iona had coordinated with the Moon Goddesses, and I wasn’t surprised in the slightest when they wanted to do the ceremony on the night of full moons. The dragoneye moons stared down at us, bathing the hilltop in baleful crimson light.
She - and I suspected it was the three of them - wanted a private ceremony, one with just the two of us.
We were both dressed for the occasion. I was in one of my favorite tunics, a bright red with golden threads, a pair of well-worn and comfortable sandals on my feet. Earrings were clipped onto my ears and rings were on my fingers, and I’d spent more time on my hair than was advisable. Auri was bleeding through a bit.
Iona had done herself up as well. Her hair was in a tight braid, over one shoulder, and she was in her full plate armor. Her weapons were all on display, and I wasn’t quite sure what Iona thought she was going to fight. Then again, it was part of her being a [Paladin], and the entire ceremony was a form of worship to her patron goddesses. Her tabard had the symbols of the two moons on them, Selene and Lunaris’s sacred sigil.
“Twenty five, right?” I confirmed for the last time. Iona grinned at me.
“Hey, if it’s good enough for you, it’s good enough for me.” She said.
I couldn’t keep a silly smile off my face. Nor could I stop myself studying Iona, memorizing details that would be permanently obliviated by my skill. The crow’s lines by her eyes, the ever-expanding silver that had joined Iona’s golden tresses. A thousand little details that had marked the relentless passage of time on my wife’s body.
Her soul shone brighter than ever, and it was that inner beauty that I loved.
“Are you ready?” I asked.
“Not yet.” Iona said with a glint of mischief in her eyes. She swept me up and kissed me deeply before letting me go with a satisfied sigh.
I pouted at how quickly it had ended.
We entwined our hands, moving in a small way such that our tattoos would’ve aligned exactly if Iona didn’t have her gauntlet on. I put my other hand on her forehead, and focused on my skill.
I let the Celestial element infuse my voice. The astral stars sparkled in my voice, inviting a sense of wonder.
“[A Drop of Eternity in a Sea of Starlight].” I spoke, and the world faded around us.
Stars.
A hundred thousand, a million, billions of glittering stars appeared in the vast cosmos around us. An entire sea of starlight for the two of us to swim in.
A single drop of pure gold condensed out of the endless starlight an infinite distance above us before falling down. It took a moment, an eternity to fall, before hitting Iona on the brow. It soaked into her body, and golden light started to shine from her eyes and mouth, then her ears, head, before her entire body turned into a radiant star, impossible to look at.
Even with all my skills, I couldn’t see what was going on. It didn’t stop me from trying, tears streaming down my face as my body tried to protect itself from the brilliant light.
The light faded and condensed, my wife looking almost the same, and yet entirely different. All the little details I’d so closely studied stood out in stark relief as being different, a thousand parts of her I knew with all my senses needing to be relearned. The world faded back in around us, and we braced for the inevitable party crasher.
White Dove fluttered up to my shoulder a moment later, glaring at Iona.
“Iona.” She Spoke, and the world trembled. “[Paragon -”
White Dove was interrupted by Selene manifesting herself on the hilltop, and literally slapping White Dove off my shoulder. The goddess vanished after the maneuver, and White Dove changed into her counterpart, Black Crow. With a vicious caw and a flash of talons, the grim reaper went for Iona’s throat.
Which was when Lunaris manifested herself, and slapped Black Crow out of existence. The only trace that was left of the two birds as one was a pair of feathers, one black, one white, that slowly drifted to the ground into an X.
The two of us stared at the feathers in shocked silence.
“I think I peed myself a little.” I finally said.
Iona started to laugh, the ‘what the fuck just happened’ sort of laugh in the face of something utterly impossible. After a moment or two I joined her, and we ended up lying down together, staring up at the beautiful night sky. A few wispy clouds weren’t enough to hide the endless sea of stars, nor the pair of moons staring down at us.
At last, Iona had joined the rest of us in Immortality. At last, I wouldn’t have to worry about the endless march of time stealing her away from me.
And somehow, she’d managed it without getting cursed.
“I love you.”
“I love you too.”
Comments
Drew
Probably since Elaine got the skill.
Inv7ctus
Woah. How much God juice did they just burn on their champion? They bitch slapped death. How long have they been saving for that?
Henrik T.
And specifically cursing people is not the original purpose of dove. If thanatos had a standing policy of cursing immortals the moon goddesses probably wouldn't have dared doing that.
Cryptic_Reality
It's about time that petty bird got a beatdown! Love it!
Dalth
The real question that goes unanswered in this chapter is… Does Sara have Persistent Casting yet, and if not, why? I can just imagine Elaine going, you need to take this skill! Sara, ehhh… Elaine: alright, Iona, behead me! And then Sara proceeds to take the skill because, who survives decapitation?
Collateral_ink
There is no need to reverse her age again. When Elaine's skill changed to its current name, it became able to bring someone to a specific age and halt them there, permanently. The only reason to use the skill again on a person is if they wanted to change their apparent age.
Tarkkail Mejn
Or perhaps next time her age is reversed WD will show up.
NDF 07
White dove isn't one of the big five gods in fact she's not even a God she's just a creation of Thanatos the God of death with the job to collect the souls of the deceased the moon goddesses do rank above her
Khal Lee
It was like watching an old batman TV show with Adam west... with the [POW] [BAM] screen emotes... bye white dove... p'wnd black dove!!! Soyonara!!!
Bulborbish
The Gods are higher rank than WD/BC (who are mere divine constructs), so presumably not. If Thanatos cared (he probably doesn't) then Iona may be slapped with a curse down the line, but it was WD/BC who insisted on cursing immortals, not Thanatos.
Hauke Sattler
@A nice fire A long time back I suggested that Elaine could immortalize Lun'Kat back into her egg.
Weebeedee
Thats some grade A bs lol. White dove will be furious. Does that mean she'll get a curse from the moon goddesses?
Phsteven
nah, not cursed to be a paragon, I'm pretty sure white dove was about to name her classes before the big slap.
Phsteven
unearned? She has been a faithful paladin for over a century, is talking with them constantly, giving them mana, spreading the good word, and she put a temple physically on one of the moons for them. Seems like she's earned a couple of well placed slaps...
A nice fire
That sounds like Elaine could apply a whole new variety of curses to immortals by turning them into children vie her skill.
Chad
I honestly don't think they made Iona promise anything they already where going to make her an angel instead. Now she'll probably reach God hood with Elain and they'll have a powerful ally In the pantheon which would be worth a lot.
Chad
The DOUBLE SLAP! 🤣
heh
I don’t hate her or anything, but I’ll try to organize some of my thoughts on why she’s not my favorite: 1) When she was first introduced a lot of people thought and still think that she’s Lyra but reincarnated, but we’ve never really seen the payoff from that so there’s an underlying sense of frustration whenever I see her. 2) There was a pretty serious lack of chemistry between her and Elaine up until the confession during the school arc, and it didn’t really get much better even after that. Like the most banter we’ve ever heard from them is Iona calling Elaine a [thing]osaurus, and conversations felt pretty stilted until suddenly they were a married couple. 3) That lack of chemistry made the initial romance between Elaine and Iona feel incredibly forced. The confession was literally just “will you be my girlfriend” “yeah” 4) The dogmatic approach to life feels really out of sync with Elaine’s way of life, especially because Elaine would already be a god if not for the fae. It just feels weird to have a super devout paladin when you’re essentially guaranteed to reach godhood if you don’t die before reaching the required level. 5) The lack of chemistry and the forced romance made the Gladiator Gauntlet arc feel like a slog. A whole arc dedicated to a character who we hadn’t seen all that much of at that point was not fun to read imo. 6) And despite all this, it feels like the story is becoming increasingly about Iona. The Gladiator Gauntlet, the trip to the moon, and the end of the story which will probably be her quest to defeat Lun’Kat, are all Iona’s goals, and when Elaine’s not doing stuff for Iona, she’s mostly doing missions for Night. So to sum it up, I feel like Iona is hogging the spotlight, which is fine; not everything has to be about Elaine and the story is better if it’s not. The problem in my opinion is that she didn’t really slot in perfectly to the story so her being in the spotlight doesn’t really feel earned. I really want to like Iona. I am both a lesbian and a tall woman enjoyer; she should be right up my alley. But I can’t bring myself to enjoy seeing her on the page. I love that you enjoy her though!
TeaGeek
She is essentially bound to any task set by the two and she has a vow she swore as a child that can cause serious issues for her in some situations. Just avoiding the risk of not bringing people together or fighting dragons are big enough reasons to block a limiting curse 🤷♀️
TeaGeek
I love Iona, especially the way she must work with her vow. It’s rare that I appreciate a character beholden to a set worldview and dogmatic approach to life. Could you list a couple reasons you dislike her, since I’m failing to get what people dislike?
Bryn Thomas
Absolute flex from Selene and Lunaris
Kurosov
It's my belief atm that she was already immortal with a curse involving aging while immortal and Elaine's skill overwrote and set her age but as she was already immortal she didn't get a curse applied. I'd assume the same thing would happen if Elaine used her skill to turn a Vampire into a 12 year old, they'd get the newly set body age but no second or overwritten curse.
Joshua Little
Thanks for the chapter.
Roombot
I’m not sure if white dove actually hates Elaine. Their interactions over the years have gotten more cordial IMO
Roombot
That’s my headcanon. It was a birthday present to Elaine.
Specter
But she already softly committed to that... what was she doing in communication with the goddesses in the previous nights if not getting over her moral & ethical objections and figuring out the deal?
Bosparan
Thanks for the chapter! Loved the closing scene - Iona totally deserved to go curse-free. Curious though that two ascended gods were able to slap down an "origin"-god. On the other hand, I don't think White Dove was truly angry with Iona to begin with, given Iona's motivation to police the immortals that try overworking Black Crow.
Archer
It was on Elaine's birthday.
Peter
Different races unlock at different ages.
Benjamin Smith
The thing is that Valkyries only take squires who specifically ask. I don't think either of them has been turning down candidates, it just hasn't happened since the goblin who decided to become a cop instead of joining the order.
DireGoat
I mean maybe but the first time we see divine intervention to stop the reaper probably shouldn't be in favor of the main cast. feels kinda hollow and unearned.
Mad Dessert
Thanks!
jacob
also remember that iona has been giving mana her entire life so her having this kind of miracle built up makes sense
Hauke Sattler
Well... I would like to remind that White Dove "forgot" to curse Titania when she got her immortality. We still don't know why. If it was because Titania is of the fae (or some other already immortal race) or if it is just White Dove's unequal treatment.
Thomas Heaton
So, what are the chances after her little tour, Iona and Nina maybe restart the Valkyries? The Valkyrie Order, now with 50% better naming sense!
jacob
not really iona changed over a century and gods probably do have a way of protecting there followers
jacob
i mean an immortal follower can go dragon slaying eventually
Lijwent
Well it kinda make sense gods can prevent other gods from doing something, especially for really loyal followers, also it wouldn't surprise me if the doves don't take like all their power for cursing someone, they are needed elsewhere while the moon goddesses can focus more of it
Darth
More Elven bullshittery?
Specter
Question is, what cost did the gods pay and what promises did Iona make
Benjamin Smith
My guess is it's a mercy to the parents, not needing to deal with an infant who thinks they know better than them.
DireGoat
Honestly not sure what to think about this. My first impression is that it feels like a cop out. edit: to be clear I was talking about the divine intervention not Iona changing her mind.
TheBotler
Indeed, but let's be honest, the birds had it coming. Good chap all the same
DireGoat
Elven bullshit every other race gets it from birth
AntiClimax she her
It's not that I thought they'd be against immortality for her, that's definitely a plus for the Lun'Kat mission, or that they want her to join them ASAP or anything, it's just that in the convo with Elaine they explicitly said that they were not going to do any miracles to save her life. Preventing the curse that all immortals get seems really Xtra or something, and doesn't seem to line up with that talk they had with Elaine. Unless they knew that the flying rat was going to curse her in a way that would hurt their plans for her. Something like "You pious person will no longer be able to pray or hear your gods" or something like that. She does seem to like to target things important to the person. And this is like a chapter after Sarah got her curse after being so afraid of it. It's... Just very surprising. As another commenter mentioned, I don't know what the narrative purpose is, though maybe it's there to set up conflict between Sarah and Iona, or Iona with other gods? Or maybe being the only immortal without a curse is a curse in and of itself if people find out?
Andrew
Thank you!
Wretch
Knowing how much Dove hates Elaine? Probably steal Iona's ability to love. Spite Eliane through Iona
CringeWorthyStudios
Didn’t say it wasn’t worth it, I was just curious about exactly *how* expensive it was.
Rainer
Benefit-cost=worth
Kennyevilmonkey
As glad as I am to see those birds getting a well-deserved *SLAP!* I just know that the next person Elaine turns Immortal is utterly fucked now...
bcdp
Even if they were eager for Iona to join them, they aren't petty like that, especially when the curse has little effect on that. And on the other hand, Iona will now be representing them on the world for an eternity until she dies. Considering how much fame she already brought them, why would they be unhappy with that? You can miss a friend and still be happy for them.
C Gillan
Elaine needs to get Amber to find a way of recording thiers memory of that. Every immortal everywhere would pay tons of gold for a record of white dove being bitchslapped.
Archer
Iona belongs to Selene and Lunaris. They weren't going to let White Dove curse their favorite Paladin.
The Random NPC
@AntiClimax I remember them not caring if she became immortal because she's a paladin with a suicide mission, she'll join them eventually
Kurosov
Gods have their own flavour of bullshit. Can’t be having immortality curses on their tangles and as a future angel prospect with an important mission. Question is, what was the curse going to be? Sex after battle saps her strength? Can’t defend from the left? Or a reverse of the vampire curse where she loses access to the system under moonlight?
Isaac Boyles
Hax! Lol
NondescriptGamer
Favoritism. I'm not saying it was that, but that's a possible reason.
PickledTink
Huh. Just had a thought. Why is it that the Elven curse manifests on their system unlock day, but for Trolls it manifests immediately? From a much earlier book (As I recall, before the time skip when Elaine was travelling with her elf buddies) you had a baby troll that had been petrified in their petrified mothers arms. I guess the White Dove is a racist who hates trolls, what with the horrible murdercurse and all.
John Lentner
This makes me suspect the curse was going to either be related to the goddesses themselves or to Elaine. I don't see why else they would intervene so bluntly.
SwitchBlaze
Amusing Chappie. Thank you.
Khal Lee
Thanks for that! LoL poor Slapped Dove of the Moon Goddesses anger... yes, now for Amber to somehow make something of this. . .
AntiClimax she her
I thought they were eager to have Iona join them, so preventing the curse is surprising to me, unless they thought the curse would impede Iona's ability to serve them.
Trevor Mergen
Thanks!
Jennifer Leigh
Amber is ridiculous.
Duct Tape Engie
Amber! :shakefist:
Ant1h3ld
Remember that Iona has a divine mission to free the moons. Compared to the non-zero chance to finally bring Lun'Kat down, a few billion (trillion?) Mana to bitchslap both White Dove and Black Crow is a pittance.
Quantenmecha
Lets see how fast Amber arrives now that she can be the lucky owner of two very special feathers.
Scott Frederiksen
Now they have an immortal paladin though. Who will still likely join them someday when she ascends herself and only bring more power and followers in the meantime.
TeaGeek
Woah. Delightfully irreverent, but I was kinda expecting White Dove to go at least a little easy on Iona since it’s almost guaranteed she’d die in battle. That’s a hell of a second blessing by the goddesses.
elijah pickett
Poor white dove 😂
CringeWorthyStudios
Lyra was better. lol. Just did a reread and that was the main thing I got from book 1. 🤣
Hodge Wasson
I didn't know bitch slapping white dove/black crow into submission was a possibility.... Good for Iona.
Tiffany Miller
Ooh good point yes. A high level paladin at that
Tiffany Miller
They have said Iona is one of their favorites
Tiffany Miller
Nope white dove and black dove got slapped hard
Cormac
Narratively, I do not understand the point of that. I have the big confuse.
Tiffany Miller
Most people probably aren't dedicated enough to make it worth jt
Deltoren
I CALL BULLSHIT THIS IS SMURFING. BAN THE HACKERS
Anonymous
I would not want to be the next person Elaine gives immortality to
Daniel B
So thats two now… neat
Lacika02
Couldnt white dove just curse her later? Nice chapter btw.
heh
There are a few reasons I’m not fond of Iona as a character, and now I’ve got another one, but goddamn that was hilarious
joss sim
Okay that made me laugh more than I think it should have. I got the image of White Dove/Black Crow being "slapped like an unwanted stepchild".
Markus
That must have been costly for the moon godess. If not why would there not be an incredible amount of them?
Tilen Praprotnik
Awww, Thanks for the chapter
Tucker Glick
No Amber popping up for the feathers lol
Tonberry
What the fuck *did* just happen? No immortal curse for Iona?
Adurna
Still cursed to be a paragon? Reminds me of doors.
CringeWorthyStudios
I’m with Elaine on that one. What the fuck? Like, if nothing else, how much fucking power did that cost those two? Spanking White Dove/Black Crow *cannot* have be cheap, even for one of their top Paladins… Thanks for the chapter!
Daniel Everest
That's some bullshit. Curses are an excellent balance!
Michael Seedorf
And that's what a god can do with a hundred plus years of prayers from a particularly devout Paladin.
Ben
So unfair, I love it
Simerop
That's cheating
Evan Stone
Who knew Gods were OP
dtape467
hacks
