Luke Everhart
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Chapter 17 - Clouded Minds, Clouded Hearts
🕑 Added 2024-11-11 14:01:56 +0000 UTC“Is he okay?” Gad shouted, panting from the floor.
Cen didn’t answer, unable to in the midst of her grief.
Kur crawled over to the caster, and checked on Mul.
“He looks fine, just knocked out. Cen! Do you hear me? He’s going to be fine!” he said, trying to calm her.
Thank the Crystal! Nar thought. He had feared the worst.
Opposite him, Viy nursed her bruised throat, coughing feebly. The guardian’s striped limbs had been imprinted onto her skin, belaying the strength with which it had strangled her with.
Their eyes crossed paths and she looked away.
You’re welcome! Damned Clean… I almost died saving you! The least you could do is…
Wait. Died?
The thought was like a pileslide inside his battered mind.
Had he just almost died?
The dull pain on his hip was nothing to the sharp pain radiating from his shoulder.
He had been stabbed!
Dropping his sword, he felt his shoulder with his other hand.
He scowled in pain and at the red that stained what was left of his shirt.
I could’ve died…
He had known, of course. He had always known that it was a very real possibility that he faced.
Death or out. Those were the only two possible endings to his Climb.
However, staring at the blood on his fingers, not from the Pressure, not from his nose or ears, but from a stab wound… That was more than knowing. That was understanding.
What are you doing? he asked himself.
He was a hybrid tank/DPS, so he was always supposed to get a little hurt. But it was supposed to be controlled, glances and scratches, or unlucky hits under or around his shield.
But he had no shield. He was left fencing for his life, waving his sword around like an idiot, dodging, moving, perhaps even running away. What sort of tank was that?
Gad, sprawled past his feet, might be tired, but she didn’t look hurt. HP, defensive attributes most likely, tank skills and the shield. All things that he lacked.
The plan, his plan, had always involved a shield.
Now, there he was, and had that blade gone into him just a couple of inches more to the right, it would’ve been the end of his Climb. The end of everything.
Crystal… Not for these people. Not for these Clean…
They didn’t deserve it. They weren’t worthy of it.
Viy hadn’t even deemed herself to say thank you. In fact, now that he thought about it, she had never even spoken to him, nor him to her. What did he owe her? What did he owe these people?
The answer was simple. Obvious. The same as it had always been since the very start, over a month ago.
He owed them nothing. He needed them to Climb. But if they dared to drag him down? Well, he wouldn’t die for their mistakes. He couldn’t risk his dad and their entire future for these strangers.
No, he had to be more careful.
From now on, no more of this shit. Tanking, yes, safely and properly, once I get a shield. Until then… I’ll just do what I have to do, to get my gains.
A hand fell, heavy, over his shin and he flinched.
“Are you okay?” Gad asked him.
She was still on the floor, covered in glistening sweat. Now that he looked closely at her, he saw a mesh of scratches and bleeding injuries. However, even as he stared, he could see that the shallowest and smallest of the cuts were already closing, healing under her powerful tank [Constitution].
And even downed, she still stared at him with that scrutinizing intensity he had come to be wary of.
“I… Yeah. I’m alright,” Nar said, hoping his face hadn’t betrayed anything.
“You got stabbed,” she said, nodding at his shoulder.
Nar looked at his bloody hand. “Yeah…”
“It will heal, don’t worry,” Gad said. “It will give you more [Constitution], too.”
Nar stared at her.
She was right, of course. What else would increase his [Constitution] other than getting hurt?
However, there had to be a difference between getting hurt and almost killed.
Gad half turned and pushed with her hands to sit up straight.
“That took a lot of HP,” she said. “But I’ve gained in [Constitution]. In the end, that's the way it is for a tank.”
Nar nodded slowly. Was she trying to tell him something?
He heard a soft scraping sound and turned his head.
Jul emerged from the darkness.
Her right hands held onto her left arms, and she walked with a downcast expression. Shame? Guilt? Nar wondered if that’s what it was. Had she run away, thinking they were doomed? Had she decided to abandon them, and save herself?
Their eyes met, and her chin quivered. She quickly sat down, hiding her face.
Nar heaved a sigh, grimacing at the pain the gesture caused.
“Don’t hold it against her,” Gad said. “It will take time.”
Nar stared at her. He had known, or at least suspected, that the big tank was a sharp person. But just how sharp, he didn’t know yet. He had to be careful around her, lest she pry open all of his secrets.
“I know…” he said simply.
Gad motioned towards Cen and Mul, the sister still holding on to her brother with a devastated expression. “Them too. Patience.”
Then she discreetly guided him towards Viy, with her eyes. Nar took a deep breath and held onto his shoulder again. That was a lot of patience she was asking from him.
“It will be worth it,” she said. “You’ll see. We’ll get stronger. Better. Tighter.”
Nar looked away. He couldn’t even bring himself to nod. Not with the sort of thoughts he harbored.
Maybe that was why she was talking to him, asking him for patience. Asking him to not leave them behind.
But then again, even if did want to, could he?
He stared at the broken guardian upon whose limbs he sat on.
He couldn’t tank one of those alone. He couldn’t even DPS it alone.
For better or for worse, he was stuck with those people. And they, in turn, needed him also. Gad may have been able to take that stab and go on fighting, but he doubted any of the others could have. And despite his shortcomings, this was the third time his DPS had come to the rescue.
However, everything felt like such a mess.
Crystal… How am I supposed to do this? Have some mercy on me.
“We’re stopping here for the day,” Kur said. “We need to recover our status. Nar, are you okay?”
“I’ll heal… I think.”
Kur nodded. “You will. You sleep now, alright? Let your HP recover. You won’t be on watch today. Neither will you, Gad.”
The tank frowned at him. “But there aren’t…”
“Don’t worry about it,” Kur said. “I’ll figure it out.”
Nar nodded, grateful, and Kur moved on to check on the rest of them.
Speaking of HP… Uh, 47. That’s more than I had expected.
What he had expected to see was his HP flashing red at him, nearly depleted after taking the brunt for that stab and crushing blow. To be honest, he had half expected it to see it at zero. However, it looked as though he had taken the damage better than he had thought possible.
If he could get stabbed and still be roughly at around half of his HP, and this right after the Pressure had tried to flay his legs from him, maybe he wasn’t doing so poorly on his hybrid path after all.
Even now, the pain on his shoulder was slowly diminishing. If he could get more [Constitution], he might even be able to brush through such hits in the future. However, for that, he needed to suffer through pain and injury.
A lot of pain and injury.
Nothing would be given for free.
If only he had a shield.
Honestly, he was starting to feel tired of that thought.
Anyways, speaking of [Constitution]... Where did that window go? Notifications, was it?
He looked around his UI for a couple seconds before his eyes landed on the notifications symbol next to his status. It was a little gray exclamation mark. In fact, other than his health and stamina bars, everything else in his UI was gray. He briefly wondered if there was a meaning to that.
He focused on the exclamation mark, and as expected, a tab popped open. It was a list of the notifications he had received so far.
A window appeared, above the list.
-[ These are your notifications.
Any and all communications from the System to you will be stored here.
Simply focus on the notification you want to access.
Currently, you can store up to 10 notifications. Any beyond that will be automatically erased, starting with the oldest. ]-
Nar turned that window off, and focused on the latest notification in the list.
-[ You have defeated one Guardian Assailant 1. 210 experience points have been awarded.
You have leveled up!
You have gained:
Constitution 11 -> 12
Agility 7 -> 8
Aura 28 -> 32 ]-
More [Aura], uh?
He closed his eyes and sighed. He didn’t have the strength to even feel angry, worried, disappointed or anything else other than resignation.
Fine, Crystal Almighty, I’ll endure and understand your lesson. I will earn Your mercy.
As for the other gains, [Constitution] was exactly what he had been thinking about, and seeing its increase graced his lips with the shadow of a smile. He just hoped that he didn’t need to get stabbed all the time to earn it. As for [Agility], he would have preferred [Strength], for his skills. However, it was at least still useful to have, especially now while he didn’t have a shield. And even afterwards, [Agility] would always be a useful attribute for a melee fighter. Perhaps, it would even prove critical down the line of his path.
However, for now, his focus was [Constitution] and [Strength]. One for defense, and the other equally both for defense and also for hitting things.
He pulled up his attributes list.
-[ NAR293457741235645XAV
Basic 5
Health Points: 47/120
Stamina: 22/110
Attributes
● Strength: 11
● Constitution: 12
● Stamina: 11
● Agility: 8
● Speed: 7
● Aura: 32
● ???: 5
● ???: 10 ]-
Level 5 already, and not much better than when I started... It’s okay, I’ll build my path slowly if I have to. No matter what happens or whatever it takes. And who knows, maybe one of those [???] attributes will be the breakthrough I need.
He just had to be patient, repent, and atone. And of course, show that he was willing to work his but off to earn it all.
“Good gains?”
Nar looked up, and found the trugger towering over him. It was easy to forget how tall the ring tosser was, especially next to Gad and Kur, who were both much more buff than he was. In reality however, the trugger actually stood somewhere in between Kur and Gad in terms of height.
“I… Yeah. I guess,” Nar said. “You?”
Tuk offered him a brief smile. “All good man. All good.”
Nar nodded, suddenly feeling awkward. Was Tuk disappointed at his gains?
Can’t be more than me. I’m already at 32 points of [Aura]...
“Here,” Tuk said, offering him a hand. “I didn’t think you’d want to sleep on top of that.”
Nar frowned and looked down. “Oh… Yeah. No.”
He took Tuk’s hand and the trugger grunted to lift him off the broken guardian.
“Damn, you’re heavy!” Tuk said.
Nar snorted. “That's just the Pressure.”
“Nah man, I'm just weak.”
Tuk guided him towards Jul, who flashed him with a brief startled look, then turned her head away. However, she moved to make some space for him to sit next to her.
Tuk lowered him down, grunting as he attempted to do so gently. “There you go. Now sleep, man. That thing looks nasty.”
Nar nodded. Now that he thought about it, he did feel tired. Really tired.
The trugger left them alone, and Nar sighed.
Stabbed, eh? Now that’s something.
“I’m sorry.”
Nar turned his head slightly. “What?”
“I’m sorry,” Jul said. “I won’t do it again.”
Nar considered her for a moment. She wasn’t looking at him, but she had turned her face to him enough that he could just see, peeking from behind her green hair, a hint of green blue eye.
“Don’t,” he finally said. “It could be dangerous. You’re safer next to Kur, okay?”
She nodded.
Nar closed his eyes.
He couldn’t really blame her, could he? She didn’t even have a combat class, much less a weapon. He did, and he had been terrified.
In fact, as he fell asleep, an uncomfortable thought slithered into his mind.
Had he not hesitated, and tanked that guardian as he should have, would Viy and Mul not have been safe? He knew that Gad wasn’t going to be able to stop the guardian as usual. Not with her legs busted up like that by the Pressure.
And he had moved. He was in the right place and at the right time to stop it.
But he hadn’t.
Had it all been his fault in the end? Could he have prevented all of it?
Had he failed as their secondary tank?
It was a thought that troubled him deeply.
If not them, it would have been me… he thought, eventually. And would they have saved me?
He didn’t know.
It didn’t matter.
He had still saved Viy, and taken the hit for it. That was all that mattered.
********
Nar woke up some time later.
His head pounded, and everything felt wrong.
A familiar metallic taste coated his tongue, and something wet and warm dripped down his face.
What… Why… Is…
His thoughts formed slowly.
He was so tired. Everything was so heavy and his shoulder and hip screamed at him.
The others were strewn around him, passed out, and the downed guardian was still there, grotesquely lit in the yellow of the arrows.
The Pressure!
That was it. It had to be. They must have been hit again while he slept.
Since he was hurt and exhausted, it must have hit him harder than usual.
Nearby, he heard the soft sound of clothes dragging across the floor.
Cen sat up. She looked at the downed party around her with an empty stare.
“Cen…” Nar called her. His throat felt like he had just swallowed a handful of aetherium, poison and all.
The caster startled and turned around.
“Nar?”
“Cen…”
He was drifting off again.
Before he did, however, he swore he heard her sob.
“I’m sorry. It was my fault. It was all my fault,” she whispered.
Then, he was gone.
