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The Rip: Chapter 3
🕑 Added 2021-11-19 03:48:36 +0000 UTCCommissioned by Areat
Chapter
Comments
Kayla Hackseed
Jesus it's like watching someone check off Maslow's hierarchy of needs in real time
Pelo Dee
Gah! Finally finished it! Sorry, that took me a while. But it was worth it. Long chapters means plenty of time to develop scenes, and I enjoyed it a lot. The embarrassing levels of sweetness from her parents is probably what I like the most. It's an accumulation of little gestures that really show the love between these three. ❤️
Feels to me like the universes are blending :P
Great trip through time to happier days
Agreed that you do the ominous foreshadowing so well. This is fast becoming one of my favorites, and I'm excited to see where it goes!
I do love this story!
"Super easy, barely an inconvenience": someone is a "Pitch Meeting" fan. :-) Also: Peter and Wendy! And I LOVE this line: "If Wendy melted any more on the inside, a diaper would have absorbed her. " Proofreading notes: you used "taught" instead of "taut" (twice), "Diddy" instead of "ditty," and "hosted" instead of "hoisted," "break" instead of "brake," "layed" instead of "lay," "unphased" instead of "unfazed," "laid" instead of "lain," "tiled" instead of "tilted"
I love the little hints of the future to come. Can’t wait to see where it goes
What an awesome part, can not wait for the next part
Areat
Steadily well written! I can't wait for the next part. :]
