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Finest Servant Chapter 350
🕑 Added 2023-08-06 09:08:24 +0000 UTCChapter 350 A Joke
"Old Prince, may I be so bold as to ask a question?" Master Lin asked with refined elegance.
Prince Cheng looked at him with a smile, "Master Lin, you are my honored guest today. There's no need for such formality. Feel free to speak your mind. I promise to answer everything I know."
Lin Wanrong nodded, pointing at the charming lady in the center of the hall, he whispered, "Prince, could you tell me why we're trying to make this miss laugh? Does she not laugh normally, or perhaps she laughs too much and has cramped her mouth?"
Prince Cheng was taken aback. Who could think of such a thing like laughing so much that it would cramp your mouth? Only Lin San could come up with such an idea. The Prince laughed heartily, patting Master Lin on the shoulder, "Master Lin, you are indeed witty and humorous. I like you. The guest of honor tonight seems to be none other than you. This miss does not lack the ability to laugh, but she has said her smile is reserved for those she favors. Perhaps it might be you, Master Lin!"
"Is that so?" Lin Wanrong squinted his eyes at the lady in the center, chuckling, "This miss indeed has personality. I like it. Actually, laughter is quite an important matter. Ah, Old Prince, what do you think constitutes success in life?" He voiced the last sentence loudly, making sure everyone in the hall could hear him clearly. Upon hearing Master Lin ready to share his wisdom, the buzzing conversations in the hall ceased, everyone perking up their ears to listen.
"I have yet to contemplate that," Prince Cheng responded with a smile, "I am eager to hear Master Lin's insights."
"Prince, of course, has no need to ponder over this. You were born into wealth and prosperity, a golden spoon at your birth. How can we ordinary folks compare to you?" Master Lin chuckled, "If you ask me, becoming successful is quite simple. Men should always strive for progress, and women should always be ready to laugh. Hehe, Prince, being a wise man, you certainly understand at once."
He was a witty man, and his words carried a flavor of playful banter. There were quite a few witty men in the hall who understood his hidden meaning and couldn't help but burst into laughter. It seemed that Master Lin was quite experienced in the world of high society, capable of delivering such subtle jokes.
Quick-witted or not, everyone understood his innuendo and turned away to hide their laughter. The miss in the center of the hall glanced at him, her thoughts unknown.
Prince Cheng roared with laughter, "Brilliant, just brilliant! Master Lin, you are indeed profound and unfathomable. I admire you, and I am growing fonder of you. However, the men here today are the best of our Great Hua. You have quite a few formidable competitors!" He said, his gaze nonchalantly sweeping over the crowd, but it rested on Su Mubai.
Being the guest of honor for this lady would surely be more delightful than being an immortal. Everyone was captivated by the beauty, their eyes fixated on her, racking their brains to think of a way to make her laugh.
Indeed, they were the best of Great Hua, agile in mind. Master Lin yawned lazily, just in time to see the large-bellied Master Ye, who had been speaking earlier, stand up, "If all my colleagues are so modest, then I, as an official, will break the ice and make a fool of myself first. Prince, let me tell a joke!"
Prince Cheng nodded and smiled, indicating for the man to continue. Lin Wanrong cast a scornful glance at him, an older, heavier man, who still fantasized about becoming the favored guest of a young lady—utterly shameless.
"Sir, may I ask what position this Master Ye holds in the court?" Lin Wanrong pulled the attention of an official seated behind him, "I observe his quick wit and flamboyant charm, and I suppose his official position is no lesser than mine."
The official almost sprayed his mouthful of wine at Lin Wanrong's inquiry. Lin Wanrong was indeed a favorite of the Emperor; he did not even consider Master Ye, which indicated that Master Lin could soon replace him. It seemed like it would be beneficial to ingratiate himself with this close minister to the Emperor. "Oh, are you speaking of Master Ye? He is indeed the current Minister of Personnel!"
‘Minister of Personnel? The bloody hell, wasn't that my boss?’ Lin Wanrong gave an embarrassed smile, "You are indeed honest. As a matter of fact, Master Ye is my superior, how could I be unaware of him? I merely asked to get to know you better. May I know your name, sir, and your position?"
The official hurriedly bowed, "I dare not, I dare not. I am Yan Daoji, a scholar at the Hall of Literary Brilliance, responsible for copying and recording various historical documents. Additionally, on major events such as worshipping heaven and imperial pardons, I draft the imperial edicts for the Emperor."
‘Ah, so he's a secretary, a good position indeed.’ Yan Daoji's position at the front of the back row implied that he was first among the second-tier officials. Lin Wanrong bowed, "So, it's Scholar Yan. I've heard much about you, my apologies for the oversight."
While Lin Wanrong was engaged in insincere pleasantries with Yan Daoji, Master Ye had begun to tell his joke. He swaggered over to the young lady, his belly wobbling with each step, and smirked, "Once, a scholar teased a stuttering child. He said, 'If you can quack like a duck, I'll buy you a bag of melon seeds!' The stuttering child responded, 'Even if you buy me ten bags of melon…melon…melon…melon seeds, I won't quack like a duck for you!!!'" [TL: The pronunciation of melon is “Gua,” similar to “Quack.”]
As he told the joke, he imitated the quacking of a duck, his belly jiggling, which made everyone burst into laughter. Master Ye looked triumphantly at the young lady but found her expression cold and indifferent, with no sign of breaking into laughter.
Lin Wanrong burst into laughter. The old man's joke was far from humorous. When men told jokes, they had to be a little risqué, without a hint of vulgarity, how could it be called a joke?
With the Minister of Personnel, Master Ye, taking the lead—although the effect was minimal—it set a good example. Immediately, several more men started telling jokes. However, the lady was like an ice cube, emotionless and unmoving, as if deaf to the laughter around her.
‘Pretentious,’ Lin Wanrong thought to himself. ‘If I hadn't seen it with my own eyes today, I wouldn't have known that you, a vixen, could also pretend to be a fairy. What an act of purity.’
Seeing the atmosphere in the hall growing lively, but no one could make the beautiful woman laugh, Prince Cheng looked around and his gaze fell on Su Mubai. He smiled, "Top Scholar Su, you are the top scorer of the recent imperial exam, your talent and knowledge must be profound. Come, give it a try."
Lin Wanrong and Su Mubai were old acquaintances, and upon hearing Prince Cheng's words, Lin Wanrong immediately led the applause. Su Mubai glanced at him, nodded, and got up, smiling, "All of us present today are Mubai's superiors. I shouldn't have stepped out of line. However, since His Highness has spoken, I have no choice but to embarrass myself. Let me tell a joke. Lin Xiaomao's parents have three children. The eldest son is called Big Egg, the second son is called Second Egg, what is the third son called?"
"This is simple, Big Egg, Second Egg, following that naturally, it's Third Egg!" A straightforward man hollered.
"Master Lin, what do you think?" Su Mubai asked with a slight smile.
‘Damn it, dare to mock me?’ Lin was extremely annoyed internally. He was an expert in banter, and although the joke was subtle, he understood the double entendre it contained. He laughed in a somewhat forced manner, and said, "Master Su, your erudition is impressive, you must know the answer better than anyone else."
Su Mubai laughed heartily, and proudly said, "Lin Xiaomao's parents have three children. The eldest is called Big Egg, the second is called Second Egg, and naturally, the third is Lin Xiaomao. Hahaha, thank you, thank you!"
It was a brain teaser, indeed interesting. Everyone present started laughing, and a few clever ones caught the underlying meaning. The third son was indeed called Lin Xiaomao, but following the order of his elder brothers, he was also called Lin Third Egg, which was not a lie!
Lin Third Egg?! The man looked at Lin in shock, only to see him smiling as if he hadn't caught the hidden meaning. The man felt relieved, thankful that Lin wasn't as clever as him.
[Lin Third Egg also means Lin San Dan, or Lin San Egg.]
The story of Third Egg was over, but the lady still sat quietly, not uttering a word. It seemed that no one could move her tonight. The audience was somewhat disappointed.
Seeing the flicker of flame in Su Mubai's eyes, Prince Cheng revealed a faint smile and stood up, "Top Scholar Su, your talent is truly delightful. But the purpose of tonight is to make the beautiful lady smile. She has been waiting for a while, but no one has succeeded. It makes me anxious. Master Lin, as you are close to the Emperor, your talent and abilities are undoubtedly top-notch. You should give it a try too. However--"
Prince Cheng paused slightly, looked at everyone in the hall, and said with a smile, "My colleagues have all tried to make the lady laugh with jokes. To be fair, Master Lin, you should also tell a joke. Does anyone have any objections?"
"Good!" The crowd erupted in cheers. They had long heard of the great name of Master Lin, who had triumphed over Goryeo and fought against the Turks. His exploits were numerous, yet they had never witnessed his talents in person. Today, they would finally have the chance.
"Ah, you flatter me, esteemed gentlemen. I, Lin San, am of modest learning and talent, and really don't know how to tell jokes," Master Lin modestly said with a shy smile as he rose to his feet.
"Brother Lin, you are being too modest," said Su Mubai, his eyes sparkling as he looked at Master Lin, "You have earned the Emperor's deep trust and are titled 'The First Talent Under Heaven' by His Majesty's own hand. The title 'First Talent' alone says it all. You must possess extraordinary abilities, far beyond us ordinary folks. What would telling a joke count for?"
"Yes, yes!" The crowd buzzed with excitement, their spirits high.
Lin Wanrong grinned, "Since Top Scholar Su values me so highly, I suppose I should give it a try. Top Scholar brother, what would you do if you encountered a mad dog on the street?"
