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13 - Triptych Mirror
🕑 Added 2022-02-28 07:08:18 +0000 UTC‘Nothing has changed.’
‘I know without a doubt that I am still myself.’
‘I am strong, and capable, and…’
My thoughts trail off. I am lost in the reflection of my face in the silver-glass mirror on the wall, too large to avoid, too fascinating to ignore.
My meticulously-maintained uniform lays behind me on the bed, framing my body in black and white latex. My frame is slight, delicate, and small. My lips rest naturally in a soft pout, and my cheeks flush with the now ever-present pinkish hues of blush. My hair, perfectly purple, silhouettes my head, immaculately trimmed.
Altered irises disappear for a moment as my reflection blinks back at me.
Everything feels real.
Examining my hands, I rub my soft latex fingertips together. The sensations are almost overwhelming; gliding, frictionless, liquid, soft synthetic tissue vividly alive.
They crystallize before my eyes. I can see the faintest hints of a seam denoting the sections of my fingers, like a doll's digits. I run a nail delicately over the little voids, feeling the faintest of indentations on each knuckle.
This is my skin.
‘Nothing has changed.’
‘Tell yourself that endlessly and you're stuck in some place already lost to the past.’
‘The past isn’t here, I am,’ I think to myself, my mind clear and my judgment no longer clouded.
My heart twinges as the glint of my augmented eyes flash for an instant in the artificial lighting. The faint mark of the house crest adorning my pupils stares back at me: like a collar denotes a slave, my eyes mark me as property.
‘Everything I am is right now,’ I tell myself. ‘Just like it always has been.’
That's true right? I can only ever be here, only ever move forward.
I feel my chest tighten as I stare intently at myself, trying to drink in reality.
‘This is me. Me. Me. Me.’
‘Maybe not mine,’ the thought occurs, another looming in the back of my mind. ‘But me. That is true.’
I touch the mirror, feeling the air of the room on my skin. I caress my cheek, exploring the soft skin like I never have before; the smoothed places where old imperfections used to dwell. For an instant I can feel the faintest pull of the spin-gravity as my arm moves, the giant station's rotation distorting the slightest motions near-imperceptibly.
My face is a doll’s and I am someone's plaything.
I press my finger to the mirror, feeling as if I too can fall through the looking glass.
‘I am made to order,’ I think.
‘I am not a person anymore,’ I know. ‘That experience is no longer mine. I can only be here, everything else beyond this moment— ‘
Someone spoke up behind me. “Amareth, are you lost in the mirror again?”
I jumped.
The moment shivered and then was gone, lost forever like all others before it. Flowing forward into the next.
I spun to discover Galli peering into my room, her impish face visible through the cracked doorway. She pushed the door open the rest of the way and walked in with a slight bounce to her step as I helplessly tried to hide the flush igniting my cheeks. “Galli!”
She halted her approach just past the threshold, her eyes working steadily up and down, appraising me, and though I tried to grin and hide my embarrassment, her knowing eyes stripped away any shred of decency, and I felt seen.
“Don’t try and play that off, little doll,” she tittered, waggling a finger. “I saw what you were doing. Playing in front of the mirror are we?”
My flush deepened.“I- I was just making sure… I— I was checking m-my hair, that's all.”
Galli smirked, failing to contain her mirth. She walked up to me, touching one of my breasts with her fingertips and delicately brushing down. “Sure… And I was just admiring this lovely, scenic spacescape,” she said, gesturing vaguely at the window.
Her eyes didn’t leave mine. She was so close. Her face filled my world. I felt like I could fall into her stare if I lingered there too long.
I nodded emphatically, my heartrate tap-tapping in my chest, hoping she would let me off easy, praying she couldn’t feel it through her fingertips.
I was wrong.
“I mean inspecting craftsmanship is one thing, but losing yourself in it…” She hummed and touched my cheek with her other hand, thumb brushing over the dimple there delicately. “In those sweet features of yours is, well, delightful to say the least! It shows you’ve finally seen just how fucking pretty you are, little doll.”
If it had been possible for me to dive in the bed and seek refuge, I would have. But, between it and I was a full three feet of space, though the gap grew smaller as Galli stepped forward again. Too close - she was too close and I couldn’t breathe properly.
Closer, again. My bed was in the corner of the room, facing the door. I set it up that way when I was first granted my own space.
Closer. My world dwindled and it was just Galli - her eyes, her touch.
And as I sucked in a breath to stammer out something - to draw on some of my long experience as a mouthy merc and offer some witticism to defuse this— this coiling tension—
My knees offered their own repartee to my situation; they gave out as they collided with the edge of the mattress and I was left sprawled on the bed. The grinning, smug face of Galli loomed over me, her palms suddenly framing my face, a knee between my legs, pulse rushing in my ears.
I was so small, and she was so large, and…
She leaned in close. “Anyways, dreamer, we gotta get going. There's a rehearsal for this weekend's event starting in a little.” A breath from my lips, she pulled away suddenly. “I don’t want to give Titania any excuses to kick our butts. Up you get, lazy-butt!”
“Oh,” I murmured, a little confused, a lot dazed. “R-right. Just give me a minute to finish getting dressed?”
Galli giggled, walking away. “Well, I suppose set dressing can’t hurt. I get the feeling Titania would be a bit miffed if you showed up naked!”
She paused and settled against the doorframe, leaning against it with her arms crossed, eyes never leaving me as I shakily pulled myself up to my feet.
I carefully put on my uniform, starting with the undergarments. Each was familiar by now; the soft snugness of the panties against my cleft, the way the soft latex glided across them sending a shiver up my spine. The tops of both stockings pulling themselves taut - keeping them at rest above my knees through some concealed mechanism - was good. The dress felt like a silky embrace as I pulled it on over the top of everything else. My apron and mob cap, each adorned with the crest of the house, sat on the bed and I felt drawn to them instead of ~/—/~.
Instead of ~/—/~
In— ~/—/~
I blinked heavily. It felt right to display ~/ Mistress’s /~ marks.
Finally, I finished by slipping my stockinged feet into my high heels. Their adjustment to my feet still felt like ethereal hands stroking and massaging them as the shoes settled around me. I was alway amazed at how rigid and conforming they felt and looked yet were so utterly supporting and comfortable once installed.
“Looks like you're finally getting the hang of dressing, little doll,” Galli remarked, her glimmering eyes locked with mine.
My cheeks burned intensely, but before I could retort, Galli turned to depart for the rehearsal. “Let’s go!”
As we walked I couldn’t help but to question.
“I still don’t get why we need to rehearse for a rich person meet and mingle,” I muttered.
“Gosh,” Galli’s voice was somewhat patronizing. “You really don’t have any grasp of culture beyond blowing holes in it, do you?”
“Hey!” I blushed. “I never said I was opposed to learning about it. It just feels like a stupid fantasy novel. Who cares about what spoon goes where? Why does there need to be ten of them?”
“Honestly, I think it's kinda fun,” Galli shrugged. “It's a lot like we’re putting on a big performance for everybody in attendance. The details themselves don’t matter as much as the show - it makes things feel dignified. Just the same as uniforms make the maid, cutlery can make a gala, to the right people”.
I fell silent, thinking about that as we clicked along, heels naturally in rhythm.
Soon, we departed the locus of maid life that surrounded our quarters and entered the mansion proper. It felt familiar now, though I’d quite literally been thrust into it days before. My roaming eyes picked out details I never would have before, cataloging every detail I could manage for later.
We worked our way higher in the palace, and as we did, the spin gravity faded and our walk shifted into a delicate dance down the corridors. Even without the assistance of the link, I began to feel a bit spacey amidst the rhythmic click of our footsteps together - I felt connected to Galli, encompassed by our shared role.
I wonder if this is how the fae might have moved had they existed?
Thinking of the fair folk seemed to summon them, as at that moment, Sylphi flitted into existence appearing in a shower of radiance like a shooting star tearing the night sky apart.
“Why, if it isn’t my star pupil and my favorite rabble rouser!” she smiled.
I honestly couldn’t have guessed which one of us was supposed to be which, and it was an embarrassing realization.
Sylphi smirked.
‘Goddess I’ll never get used to her knowing what we think.’
“Don’t get too worked up over it, Amareth,” Sylphi said, her voice a soft whisper that came from just behind my ear despite its source floating in front of me.
“What’s the hold up, Sylphi?” Galli asked, looking perplexed.
“Oh, it's nothing really! Just wanted to check in and offer to help if Amareth struggles in the ballroom.”
Galli snorted. “Really, Sylphi, I doubt she’s gonna struggle based on her previous line of work, she’s been dodging and ducking with the best for ages. Bullets and Ballrooms, right?”
I stood, confused as usual, the subtleties of this strange point in spacetime lost to me entirely. Before I could pull together the will to ask them for an explanation Sylphi ushered us down the vast hallway. The space opened up in front of us as we passed through a marble archway out into a strange courtyard atop the palace that followed the curvature of the station far beneath.
“It’s pretty lovely, huh?” said Galli as she noticed me pause at the threshold.
“Yeah. It’s like somebody dropped a green belt onto this place.” I said, still drinking in the verdant green all around. “Is this --”
The space was absolutely stuffed with myriad plants and overflowing with life beyond. In the center of the back wall stood a massive set of doors, each dwarfing everything else in the garden. A stone-slab path led down from where we stood across the mossy ground to the steps, which rose up to meet the gateway.
Sylphi drew near, alighting on my shoulder. “Not bad for a first guess!” she said. “It’s the fairy garden, and also the main entrance the to the Grand Ballroom”
“Every time I start getting a grip on this place, you peel back another layer to reveal another dreamscape.”
Galli grinned. “If you think \this is wild, wait until you see the grand ballroom.”
I nodded silently and followed the two to the gates.
The Grand Ballroom certainly lived up to its name - albeit somewhat dizzyingly - as it curved up visibly on all sides. The walls stretched up until halfway around the arc of the station. At this threshold they opened into a fractal explosion of glass, metal, and technofuckery frozen in time.
The intent of the design was obvious; it looked as though half of the tubular room had burst apart, torn asunder into the depths of space and frozen at the height of the tempest. Opposite from the ballroom floor where the ceiling might have been had the space been bound by planetary gravity was a stage jutting up from the depths of the mad modern art display that constituted the roof. I felt like I would snap my neck trying to see every component of the gestalt.
“Holy—“ ~/Good maids speak politely/~ “Uhm. Holy Cow.”
“I know, right?” Galli clapped her hands together eagerly. “It’s my favorite room in the mansion. I feel like I step out of the mortal realm entirely here.”
“I would say it’s certainly a cut above the rest of this wonderland,” Sylphi said. She glided ahead of us a short way, before bursting into a blur of striated light, and disappearing into the darkness above.
I blinked at the display, but she was back almost immediately.
She bloomed back from the darkness like a glorious flower, bursting forth in a fireworks display of shattered light, each piece fluttering back to earth as countless flower petals. As they fell, they dwindled in brightness until only sparks remained on the floor.
The dwindling light coalesced like sand in the wind back into the familiar form of Sylphi, only this time she was almost as tall as Galli.
I had to tilt my head up to meet her eyes now. “Sylphi? I…”
The AI’s face stretched into a Cheshire grin, her features becoming something clearly inhuman; eyes wide, her body cast in something resembling cell shading, and something sharp in her posture, something that could shred one’s resolve.
“Have you always been able to do that?” I blankly finished, transfixed by seeing her manifested at such a scale.
She reached out to pat me on the head with insubstantial fingers. “Where’s the fun in telling you that? Silly.”
Galli laughed. ”She really likes to play up the mystery doesn’t she?”
I snickered a little myself. “No. Sylphi? Playing things up?”
Slyphi continued unphased. “Even unaugmented people can see me in here. This room is brimming with low-energy laser projectors. It’s the same system we first met through, but scaled up a lot. It could easily accommodate a thousand-person projection!”
“Oh, I didn’t know that… I guess it makes sense since I could see through you.” The sheer amount of data… I felt dizzy for a moment, feeling the pull of the station's rotation again; its invisible hand pressing on me. That sort of system had to easily require an exaflop of processing power to control. That it would be spent on sycophants amusement — and, really, Mara’s entertainment…!
Sylphi reclaimed my attention by reaching out and gathering my gaze with a smooth, undulating hand motion. “I have another little trick just for you.”
She continued, the motions seeming to pull dust from the floor. She wove it into an increasing flow of glittering dust. “We usually use these nano refractors to cover the blind spots between people.”
The metallic particles danced to her gestured instructions rising up in a cloudy glimmering series of estuaries all of which flowed out into the digital sea of Sylphi herself.
“But in all honesty, I prefer doing this with them!” she happily proclaimed.
The turbulent flow of the glittering particles turned into a strange laminar flow that resembled a loading bar extrapolated into its third dimensional equivalent, and Sylphi seemed to meld together with them.
It was a spectacular display, and I couldn’t help but stand there and simply gawk.
“That's not even the coolest thing these little gals can do,” Galli said into my ear, pushing me forward suddenly and sending me tumbling into Sylphi’s arms.
…Sylphi’s arms?
I squeezed the purportedly-insubstantial elbows holding me up. Yes, that seemed to be the case.
I glared at Galli. “Alright, when did you stick me into Fulldive VR?”
Then Sylphi’s hands were on my elbows, holding me firmly at arm’s length, and I found myself in the center of a pair of giggling girls with no meaningful way to escape. Sylphi leaned forward and stole a kiss from me before the absolute bewilderment of being caught and held could wear off. ”We didn’t, you ditzy doll! The refactor nanites can condense themselves to reflect any projections within range.”
Galli chimed in “Which means you can also technically direct them to take any shape you want — even friend shaped!”
In my bewildered state, I didn’t have anything to say to that. The two seemed to find this even more amusing than my initial embarrassment and accordingly squished me in-between their bodies in an impromptu group hug.
I jumped as an unfamiliar hand pinched my side. “Hey! This is no fair, Sylphi! You were the one person I got to feel bigger than,” I complained.
The pair released me, and Sylphi stepped back to examine her body appraisingly.
“Oh, come on Amareth, It might be convenient to see me as small, but I am more closely the station you are standing in,” She gestured down her body with her hand, “than any of one the avatars we have spoken through.”
I pouted. “Okay, fine. I guess. But why didn't you do this before now?”
“Believe me! I would love to indulge in the sins of having flesh more, but the system doesn’t work very well in higher spin sections of the station,” Sylphi giggled. “In fact, it kinda melts into a puddle under any force stronger than the microgravity up here in the ballroom and spindle.”
“It’s honestly homophobic,” Galli said, looking longingly at the fae.
The cold voice of Titania interrupted us from behind. “Sylphi. If you’ve finished distracting my maids, I have need of them for this rehearsal.”
Sylphi spun and waved cheerfully at Titania. “Of course, Head Maid, but first I have one final, essential task to complete.”
Titania sighed and stroked her temple with a fingertip, “If you must.”
Sylphi turned and leaned in to kiss Galli forcefully, practically knocking her off her feet, before pulling back to eye me with her familiar, hungry grin.
“O-oh,” I took a step backwards. “I— Mmm!”
Her lips were cool, with a metallic smoothness so silky it was distracting, yet they were also still so, so alive. I couldn’t help but moan softly as she pulled me off balance by my waist. She used another hand on my nape to lock me close, pressing our lips together, softly crushing my mind with her kiss.
“Alright. Alright. Indulge yourselves later, girls.” I felt Titania’s icy glare on the back of my head. “Pet princess of mistress or not, Sylphi, I need these girls to get to their place in this madness.”
Sylphi let go, leaving me dizzy. ”Of course. I don’t wish to impose any further.”
I felt Galli’s hand on my shoulder, but I shook it off and started following Titania into the ballroom on my own, fighting the blazing flush on my cheeks with as much dignity as I could muster.
Her and Sylphi’s gloating grins were a tangible presence behind me. I did my best to ignore them.
Before I knew it we were all lined up together, almost like the day I—
~/
—
/~
“Alright maids, enough delays! It’s time we get going,” Titania barked as she stopped and turned to face us. We all lined up in front of her, and as she passed me, her face softened ever-so-slightly. “I know this is the first time for one of you but the rest of you are quite ready for what comes next”
Everyone else replied suddenly with a solid, “Yes, Ma’am!”
“Everyone ready?”
“Yes, Ma’am!”
Galli and Iri stepped closer to me, flanking me in the lineup.
Iri leaned in close. “We will catch you if you fall this time,” she whispered.
It finally dawned on me.
Oh, stars.
The link started with the world, which promptly cracked in two as I felt everyone surge into me, and I into them. This time though, the feeling didn’t crush me underneath untold pressure and weight. All the time linked with Galli and Iri must have paid off.
I felt like a star in a constellation, my mind one spark of life in a great painting. I didn’t really fit anymore.
There was only us. Smiling, bright and transcendent. Us. Us. Us!
We were one being. Where before we had all been separate strands, we were now woven together into a tapestry of service.
Each motion of our rehearsal connected through our link. Every action lined up with the next in a way that must have seemed premeditated from the outside. Every gesture, deliberate.
My own movements were a delightful, choreographed dance across the ballroom, through the neighboring kitchens, halls, and corridors. For the next three hours I lived, breathed, and thought as We. A superorganism of maids, We were poised, polite, demure, and above all else, efficient.
We served trays with food to the tables that would someday soon hold countless guests. We danced between them, carrying drinks and desserts. Lost in the dance, We were all such perfect automata.
To top off the evening with a flourish, We all lined up in a row, facing each other. I found myself across from someone other than Galli or Iri. I didn’t know her, but her name came so clearly to me! Emerald, though she preferred Emera. Her face was lit with a blank, beatific smile.
Her green eyes glinted. No, they glowed softly, her attention was a presence in my mind, learning of me, knowing me. In my own way glowed, feeling the pleasure of good service accomplished welling up in me.
Titania stood at the head of the line to address us.
“Maids! You’ve all been spectacular this evening,” she announced, her black bob framing a slight smile for a change. “And I am especially pleased to see our new maid performing her duties with such grace. Good Maid!”
My ears could have been used for guiding in a landing spacecraft, and my cheeks were aflame with embarrassment.
Emera leaned in close to address me. “Amareth, since you’ve never done this before, I think I’ll lead.”
I exhaled heavily. “Oh, r-right.”
The first cords of a strange and breathy orchestral piece filled the great emptiness that had rested quiescent in the room before.
And then We were off again, with Emera leading us into the opening of what at first had the rigidity of an ancient court dance long forgotten. The motions and steps of which were like some odd fae cousin to the waltz, but swiftly they began to diverge into something entirely otherworldly.
Then the music picked up, as if a great gust of wind had blown through a sea of chimes and woodwinds. The tones, meeting with electronic support, began to depart from traditional orchestral accompaniment. It was vibrant. It was bright. It was floaty and loose.
The whole room felt like lighting was about to strike, charged with anticipation.
Emera pulled me close to her chest until with our hands clasped together and elbows almost touched. Her excited grin filled my view, and I couldn’t help but smile back breathlessly.
And then we exploded apart in a burst of motion. The faint touch of the link drew me into the next step with perfect synchronization, and I found my momentum turned easily into a spin.
I fell into the moment, finding perfect stillness amidst unceasing motion. I realized without time to think that I had been launched into another maid’s arms, who easily redirected my flight into a gentle arc back to Emera.
The microgravity transformed every motion into an arcing flow of near weightless movement. I didn’t have time to think as each move of the dance simply connected to the next, and the link caught me up in the flow.
Eventually the music began to slow like a storm passing the last drops of rain falling on wet leaves. As it did so, I was struck by the silhouette of another maid leaping across the display, her body just like—
Not her, please. No. No. No.
A wave of light-headedness struck me. I almost lost my balance and stumbled. Iri’s appeared arms appeared swiftly, catching me with delicate ease
“Oh no! I’m sorry, Iri!” I gasped loudly, horrified.
She smiled at me knowingly. “You were wonderful dear. It's always my pleasure to catch you when you fall.”
Her glowing lips and circuit traces flickered with what I now knew meant amusement.
“Well,” I said. “T-thank you then, Iri.”
“Of course”
A slow soft clap interrupted our conversation. I turned to its source, and as I did I suddenly found myself and every other maid facing Mistress, who had walked out from one of the many concealed ingresses into the ballroom.
Before I knew what I was doing, I found myself delivering a deep curtsy towards her. Around me, other maids echoed the movement with eerie precision.
Titania promptly approached her, and the pair began a brief hushed conversation. After just a few moments, Mara smiled up at the tall woman and stood up on her tiptoes to deliver a delicate peck on the cheek.
While this drew my attention, in my periphery I noticed something very odd begin to happen. Maids I had never seen before began to pour in steadily from the many vestibules around the lower arch of the ballroom to gather up all the settings, table dressings, and other sundry that had been setup for our rehearsal.
I was shocked to discover such multitudes existed that I had never met, or even noticed; sisters that I hadn’t shared in the knowledge and pain of. Their voices didn’t sing with ours, they weren’t connected at all…
Were they not us? Were we not we?
The more I observed them, the more I felt a growing sense of unease. They all wore an identical uniform cut to hang to the floor, with a long apron and matching covers on their sleeves. Earpieces like the ones I had trained with adorned each and every one, connecting up and into an encompassing bonnet that kept their hair from my sight.
They looked like they could have been cut from the pages of some ancient victorian novel, save for the fact that all of their attire was made — of course — from latex.
“Amareth.” My thoughts scattered as she suddenly pulled my attention to her with her smooth commanding tone.
I straightened.
“Uh. Yes Mistress,” I said, trying to avert my eyes slightly, for fear that she might look into them and see all my worries laid bare.
“I have to say,” she said, touching my cheek. “That you are shaping up into quite the stellar part of this great dance.”
The compliment felt far better than I could recall her words had been the morning after.
For a moment I managed to look towards my Mistress. “Thank you Ma’am.”
Her thumb stroked over my cheekbone. I could feel her eyes boring into mine, seeking something. My eyes fluttered. “I only had the pleasure of catching the end of the show, but I did get to watch Emerald and the other maids juggle you about in quite the delightful manner.”
While our conversation continued I noted the advance of the strange new maids around us.
“Yes, it was…” They moved without the same joy we’d carried into each and every motion during the evening's rehearsal. There was only empty, mechanical efficiency. Only a task, not a role. “It w-was quite thrilling, to be honest.”
One of the new maids in black passed through our bubble. Her face seemed almost blank, save for the faint look of… of lust?
“Dancing here in the ballroom tends to be so, dear. “I am pleased to know you are so capable of embracing it.”
Another maid passed, and this time I openly stared, watching her move smoothly — even robotically — past, that same hint of…of something on her face.
“Who? Who are they?”
Mara stepped closer as I turned to look back at her. Meeting her eyes.
Mistress’s smile turned vicious, and I felt something drop in my stomach. “They’re the help, that’s all. They keep you lovely maids from having to bear all the hard work alone.”
I felt my hands shake with… with something. I didn’t know what emotion. I wanted…
Something ached. Somewhere deep. It made me want to act —to…
I balled my fists and, turning away from Mistress, stepped in front of one of the maids. She stopped immediately before she could walk into me, her face impassively blank for but a moment before she smiled hollowly.
“How may I be of service to you today?” She said.
“What’s your name?” I demanded. There was an emptiness to her eyes — a vacant glassiness — that made my stomach twist. Why weren’t they like us? We weren't special. Why?
She looked down at me blankly. “It is unimportant. We would be happy to assist you in any way you might—”
“Assist me by telling me who you are, then,” I snapped.
I felt hot. I felt angry. My manicured nails dug into the soft undersides of my synthetic hands.
The maid looked through me. “We do not have names,” she said. “We are simply the help. May we assist you in some other way?”
I felt the urge to reach out and shake her to whatever extent my f-f-f— fragile, tiny doll body would allow.
But then Mara’s hand closed on my shoulder. “Maids don’t fraternize with them, Doll,” she said. “You may give them orders. You may direct them as you need. You can look, and you can touch. You can fuck them if you so please, but do not make the mistake of thinking that they are in any way your equal, let alone people. They are the help. Nothing more. Nothing less.”
I pulled away and took a step back, fear and anger mingling into a potent cocktail of ill thought. “What did you do to them?” I demanded.
Mara’s smile was thin and sharp enough to cut. “Bespoke toys don’t scrub every toilet in this palace. You have no idea how close you came, doll. if I hadn’t seen your potential, and decided you were merely wanting in etiquette and form at that blood soaked dinner…”
Something in me recoiled, taking the anger with it. Mara saw it. Her smile widened. “You’re special to me, after all. So special that I may even forgive you this little rebellion of yours.”
She stepped forward and took my chin firmly in her hand. “If, that is, you can convince me that you are capable of showing restraint.“
“I have the perfect punishment in mind.”
