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Outrun - Chapter 196

🕑 Added 2025-01-13 23:04:01 +0000 UTC

Comments

kreiverin

It will be very Fanny if she in one day be Knight or Inquisitor ))

Lost Rain

She'll ask at some point. Also though, she's been with the guy for less than a day, so all that more interpersonal relation stuff will come in later. Yes, the squires were all suggested by the readers. I think it's fun to include my patrons if they're interested. Just because it's a character suggested by the readers doesn't mean I don't have a story for who they are and why they are the way they are just like every other character though. It's part of what makes the interaction fun. I'll go back soon and cut some of the internal monologue waffling if it's getting repetitive. It was more so to show that she has started to notice Confirmation Bias in her own actions and thoughts and her change as a character to start second-guessing her own thoughts to make sure they're really hers. I'm just bad with names, and I was pointing that out in the chapter. Usually, I think a joke like that would just blow over fine, but it happened to be in a chapter with a bunch of similar jokes that affected the tone overall and turned it more satirical than usual. I also like the situational/setting jokes more, though they're harder to do. Also, you didn't hurt my feelings. I get it.

Gardor

Is this a response to me saying Shiro should have asked what's up with Dev? I don't think that really matters, tbh.

ShadeByTheSea

I'm pretty sure all the squires, besides the MC, were suggested by readers.

Gardor

Sorta feel like we're either fast approaching or already blew past the time when Shiro would have simply asked the guy why he's so jumpy. Not asking indicates a level of social anxiety or passiveness (or something, I'm not doctor) that is honestly superhuman, and she doesn't seem to have that problem with anyone else. It kinda reminds me of her not picking up on the boys having a crush on her during the school arc, it seems more like an author decision over a character decision, to me. Also, I'm feeling like her unwillingness to blame this on the circle is their new AoE mind fuck spell, and I'm liking how the internal monologues waffling on their involvement get more common as she pushes against the mind control. Hopefully she breaks through soon, cuz it is repetitive to read. If it's NOT the circles mind control, then you've written essentially the same paragraph too many times. And just cuz I feel guilty about bad mouthing your comedy chops, I wanna be clear, I do find parts of the story funny. It's the TYPE of comedy i have an issue with. The comedy in this story (imo) should be stuff like crazy characters and surreal situations caused by cyberpunk and maybe magic hyjinks. When ya pull back the curtain and do the silly names, and then the characters go "wow what shitty names [the author came up with]", that's a whole different kind of story. That's Dungeon Crawler Carl being a farce/satire, or any of the "new world works on the narrative conventions of my world's stories" xianxia isekai. I think Dev is funny, is think Corvid can be funny, i think a lot of the cyberpunk world building can be darkly funny. Just wanted to explain so I didn't hurt your feelings.


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