thank you to the real ones who have stuck around and been pr..
🕑 Added 2023-05-15 16:27:08 +0000 UTC
thank you to the real ones who have stuck around and been present on my page while I was taking a short break for 2 weeks. A few of you were sending “just checking in” and “coffee” tipped messages even though I haven’t been online much and I have to say that’s just such a beautiful gesture. Thank you for your support while I decompress and tend to my mental health **before** I start feeling burned out. I’m getting better at listening to my body. It sucks that in the time “I’m tending to my bones” and getting my battery topped off, that such a huge portion of my fan base leaves and my income plummets. But the good fans, the real fans, y’all know that every time I take a break I’m able to come back more fully! I’m so grateful you’re here. Thank you.
I am on my final days in the United States. Wound up having to get an emergency passport renewal appointment, my work _________ (redacted) ended after a whirlwind trip, so in this extra time I’ve been really present in my day and in my body. Road-tripping around. Yesterday + today I rented a Jeep and headed to the coastline. Water creature + windows down + driving my 4x4 + tits out on an empty morning beach.
I drove lastnite until midnight. Drove from Raleigh. Parked my jeep and slept in a parking lot. I was up with the sun, and headed to the beach. Today I was going to film the wild herd of horses that live on the Outer Banks!
Before I got started though, the moment pavement turned to sand; I got stuck. I suppose I’ve driven 4x4 vehicles before but never needed to down/up shift into. I was struggling when an old timer silver Fox and his wife, having their morning beach stroll saw me and came to help. He leaned into passenger window and explained how to shift, verbalizing what gear I was in as I did. When I gave it a little gas to peel out into the beach, *in the most proud grandpa voice* “that’s it! you got it!” I was beaming ear to ear. Waved goodbye to him, and his wife as I passed. Done the stretch of sand I go!
For the following 5 hours I spent on the Outer Banks, passing in my jeep or while walking past other beach combers and drivers - a mutual subtle hand wave. waves of acknowledging, of “I see you” safety, waves to say we are a community here, hello.
I love this. it’s a small town thing, an American thing, a Southern thing. The more often I come home to USA the more I realize how much I never got to love it fully. What a huge beautiful place this is. I’m making up for lost time now that I’m an immigrant far away.
When I had a stretch of sand (miles at a time) to myself, no people no homes no trucks, my tits came out. Wind felt so lovely. Overcast at the beach is my favourite kind of beach day. Balmy, not hot, not chilly. Just nice.
Today was good. Literally a perfect day. Didn’t get what I came here to see, but that just means I’ll have to make a return trip in a few months. Don’t gotta twist my arm!
